Finally, it looks like my ongoing fight with the Inland Revenue may just be coming to a close.

Way back in March last year, I got a snotty letter from the Inland Revenue telling me that my tax return for 2003/4 was now officially late, and I was being slapped with a penalty fine of £100 as a result. OK, fine – except, well, I hadn’t actually received a tax return for 2003/4. I called them immediately, and told them so. “We’ll send one out, and put the account on hold” they said.

Did they fuck as like.

In May I got another demand – it was still late, another £100 had been thrown at me, and I still hadn’t received the bloody tax return in the first place. Another call, another promise, and finally a tax return arrived. I filled it in, enclosed all the shit they asked for (P45, P60, blah blah) and sent it back. Like a numpty, I didn’t send it recorded delivery.

Yes, Inland Revenue lost it. Along with all the documents. Oh shit.

Everything’s gone on from there, really. Two more returns (one lost, one finally received), shitloads of demands for money, invoices, the lot. Oh, and a similar scenario for the 2004/5 one, which started happening this year, to a disturbingly similar pattern.

Finally it’s all looking like it’s been sorted. It turns out that a company I was a director of, and left back in August ’04, hadn’t told Inland Revenue I’d left. (and had earned fuck-all with) So Inland Revenue thought I was still self-employed, and getting money from the company. Except I’d left them, and told Companies House so as well. Your standard “linked up government” *cough* scenario. I got a return for 2005/6 as well, but it now looks like common sense may have taken hold, and I won’t have to fill it in. That’s getting verified today, as you can imagine. I want that decision in writing. Ideally in 48point bold, with flashing lights.

And the final amount? After two years of stress, hassle, threats of court, (Well, being told the day before the court date “Oh, you’re supposed to be in court tomorrow”. I’m sure there’s some kind of statutory requirement to fucking tell me that? “Oh, we sent out a letter”. In a similar way to the other ones that I haven’t received? “Oh.”) threats of bailiffs and tax inspectors?

£150

That’s it. One hundred and fifty sodding pounds. It’s cost more than that, just in administration at their end. Hell, it’s cost me a bundle just in phone calls and postage. Pity I can’t count that against the payment.

Still, the cheque goes off today, and hopefully that’ll be the end of it…