Following on from a stomach bug (food poisoning, viral thing, whatever) there’s a stage in the recovery process that is a real throwback to childhood, but that has a joy all of its own – and far out of proportion with the actual import of the event.

That event is the first post-illness solid dump. There’s a true happiness about this, coupled with knowing that you can finally drop your guard a bit, and not worry that every single occasion involving that area is going to necessitate a run to the closest loo.

Or, to quote a friend…

Thought I was going to fart.
Was wrong.