I’m seriously thinking (allbeit for next year now) of getting some big stickers printed up that just say

For christ’s sake, it’s still only fucking September!

Where will I use them? In supermarkets, when they’re already selling Christmas cake, pudding, mince pies, and general Festive Tat.

I mean seriously, we haven’t even got the bloody Hallowe’en stuff out in some of the shops – let alone feckin’ fireworks – and yet there we are, all the food and tat for the Festering Season is on the shelves already.

One of the local garden centres even has on display all the chavtastic house-decoration shit.

It’s fucking September. I despair.