B&Q can't find their arses with both hands and a flashlight

Archive for the category “Domestic”

Perfect Timing

On a totally different note, why is it that batteries in smoke alarms and CO2 detectors *always* need replacing at 4am?

Bastard bloody things.

Still, at least I now know – not that I had any doubt, and I certainly didn’t need any proof – that I can’t sleep through a CO2 alarm.

(And of course yes, I can now – because I pulled the dead/dying batteries out of the fucking thing)

Seen In Summer

Things I see regularly on my current commute that just worry me more than they possibly should…#

  1. Riders of powerful bikes on the M1 wearing t-shirts and shorts.
  2. Rear passengers in cars reclining with their legs hanging out the windows
  3. Front passengers reclining with their feet on the dashboard.

All of these setups worry me – in all cases, if anything were to happen, they’ll be injured far, far worse than they would be if they were sitting properly.

Of course, none of it is really my problem. I just can’t help noticing, and being somewhat concerned.

Learning Curve

It’s been a bit quiet round here over the last month. I’m still around, just been hugely busy with new job, and a learning curve “so steep it might as well be effing vertical” (© Ade Edmondson, from the Bottom Live video)

I’m much, much happier than I was in the previous job, and have already lasted longer than I did there.

All the handover stuff is now done, so it’s all down to me now. Let’s hope I’ve learned everything I need for the basics…

Anyway, with a bit of luck I’ll be able to have a bit more time to update D4D™ from here on.  But regardless, all is good.

Nearly Done

2014 has been another of those grim “Summer of Sport”s that piss me off.  But it’s nearly over, which is A Good Thing.

This year’s sport includes…

  • Winter Olympics
  • World Cup (Football)
  • Commonwealth Games
  • Wimbledon (as usual)
  • UK Grand Prix (as usual)
  • Tour de France (as usual) with UK start
  • Various cricket things
  • Various rugby things
  • Various cycling things
  • Other stuff I can’t recall right now.

The real genius is that a lot of it was all on the same weekend – Grand Prix, World Cup, Wimbledon and Tour de France start. Genius right there.

Still, we’re now at the point – now the World Cup’s finally bloody over – where it’s (I think) just the Commonwealth Games to go from the list of ‘main’ events.

And then of course we’ll just be back to the normal football instead. *sigh*


Stone Down

In other news, I’ve now lost a stone in weight this year.

That puts me on a weirdly OCD number (ending with two zeroes) although still at the high-end of “Functioning fat fucker”, with a way to go.

I’m happy with the progress though. I’d like it to be quicker (wouldn’t we all?) but at least it’s progress.

Failed Survey

I got a survey by email today from Randstad Technology, asking about skills required for management and leaders, as well as about Career Progression etc.

Now, glossing over the fact that my version of “Career” is to use the definition of to move swiftly along; rush in an uncontrolled way” (as in ‘Careering downhill’)  – and thus not really relevant to me, and my opinion not being really relevant to it – there’s a couple of pretty glaring errors on the second page, which amused me somewhat…

OoopsSo I’m assuming that the third top attribute should be ‘numeracy’, and one of the three top skills should be “attention to detail”…


Last night, I went to see Chef at the cinema. It’s brilliant – if you get the chance, go and see it.

Lots of films (or their reviews/pimps) bang on about being “the feel-good movie of the season/year/decade” – Chef doesn’t, but bloody well should. It’s ace.

The basic premise is simple – talented chef gets bored by humdrum menu/restaurant, has a meltdown at a restaurant reviewer, loses his job, goes off and launches a food van doing what he loves. But the acting, the script – and the food – all raise it up a level.  I’ve never been in a film where you hear the audience groan with lust/envy at the presentation of food in the film. They did in Chef.  Sure, it’s – kind of – a film for foodies, but it’s not just that. It’s one of those films where you can see that they had fun doing it, that it was an enjoyable thing to work on.

It’s funny, it’s sweet (without being mawkish, cloying, or any of the normal American emotional guff) and it’s just good.

Go and see it. It’s worth it.

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