D4D

If brains were dynamite, you might just have enough to blow your nose.

Archive for the category “Commuting”

Squish

Maybe I’m more aware of it this week, with Death of the Mau, but on my drive to and from work I’ve noticed a lot more dead animals by the roadside this week.

Uncommonly, the great majority seem to be badgers (of varying sizes and ages) which I always find very sad.  At least these are on dual-carriageways, rather than the completely-intact bodies I sometimes see on the edge of other roads. (I’m never quite convinced that these aren’t actually from farmers/people gassing them, and using the roads as a convenient excuse/reason for dead badger, and disposal thereof. But I’m horrifically cynical)

In my opinion it’s always sad to see dead badgers – they’re awesome creatures – but particularly seeing younger ones depresses me.

I suppose it’s that time though, with semi-mature ones making way for new litters and exploring the world, and also post-winter-sleep. (I know they don’t ‘hibernate’ as such, but they certainly appear to slow down significantly over winter)  All the same, you’d hope that a driver would notice a bloody big black-and-white creature lumbering across a dual-carriageway. (I know they don’t, because they have issues noticing other cars, let alone animals. But still, we can hope)

People Carriers

As has been noted before on here, I do a fair amount of driving on any given week, mainly for commuting. It’s about 400-500 miles per week at the moment – although I’ve had greater mileages, and lesser ones.

One of the things I notice during those drives is how drivers do seem to group up, and that certain groups are infinitely worse than others. There’s always the usual culprits – BMWs, Audis, and White Vans, but there’s another one I notice more over time. MPVs, or people carriers.

I don’t know if it’s because BMW et al don’t actually do people carrier vehicles, but it does seem that MPV drivers are on a par with BMW drivers. In particular it seems that Citroen Xsara Picasso (now renamed the C4 Picasso, I think) are a breed of shit drivers. I’ve lost count of the times I’ve seen these vacuous bell-ends approach roundabouts in the wrong lanes, cut across lines of traffic, cruise across busy roundabouts, stick their cars into the flow of traffic, weave across multiple carriageways, and generally act like cunts.

So yes, welcome to the ‘shit drivers’ group.

  • BMWs and Audis
  • White Van drivers
  • MPVs – and Picasso drivers in particular.

More Gof

Today has been an excellent example of why (sometimes) it’s a good thing for my commute to be getting me in to work earlier than usual.

Despite it being even foggier than yesterday, and a pig of a drive (still unlit idiots, or people shitting themselves at not being able to see) it was a smooth run, and I got in on time.

Other colleagues coming in for ‘normal’ times though have been absolutely screwed. Apparently two trucks collided in the fog on the dual-carriageway near the infamous Black Cat Roundabout, which led to epic screwage of all relevant traffic in the area.  (Even better, soon afterwards the other end of the same road was equally screwed up by a truck shedding its load all over the entry roundabout. Well played…)  It’s taken them two to three hours to do the drive that takes me 45 mins on average.

Hopefully it’ll all be sorted by the time I head home. It should be – there’s plenty of time yet – but all the same, it’s been a useful example.

Lit

This morning’s drive in to work was foggy – foggy enough that you could see maybe three or four car-lengths ahead, and not much more.

So it left me quite gobsmacked to see how many drivers today weren’t bothering with their foglights – and in some cases without any lights on at all.

Considering how every pisswit fuck-knuckle in Christendom seems to put their fog lights on when it’s misty – and then leave them on for three damn days afterwards – it’s pretty amazing when you come across cars today (and particularly bloody silver ones) with no lights on at all.

What on earth are these drivers thinking? (And yes, I know, they’re not thinking)  After all, it’s not like they can see any better than I could – I just don’t get the mindset of “Oh well, other people will be able to see me, even if I can’t see them”

I don’t mind people being stupid, inconsiderate, and fuck-witted. If they want to die on the road, that’s fine with me. What I do mind is the other people affected by those decisions. And that’s just cuntish.

Travel Time

Over the past year, much has been made of the HS2 train route, and how it’ll improve transport links in the UK. It’s absolute balls, as most common sense would tell you.  Mind you, what *would* be useful would be a route going across the country, rather than up-and-down it.

An example…

My current contract is in Cambridge, and I live near Milton Keynes. Road-wise it’s an OK run, takes me 45-60 minutes each way.

But by public transport? Oy, fuck me, what a nightmare. For fun, I had a look.

Milton Keynes -> Cambridge isn’t a direct route (because there’s no ‘across’ rail line) Instead, I’d have to go :

  • From Milton Keynes into London Euston
  • From Euston to Kings Cross
  • From King’s Cross to Cambridge.

Now that is madness – it’d be 3 hours in the morning, and at least two on the way home. (Weirdly, trains seem to run better on the return journey)

And then you get to the real madness. The price. Because it’s a ‘via-London’ route, and at ‘peak time’ the cost was always going to be high. But it turns out that a day return comes to £73.70. Yep, just under seventy five quid. Per day. I don’t pay that for a week’s fuel.

And if you think I’m lying – here’s the screenshot from Trainline.com…

mk_to_cambridge

Flickering

As I’m now working in Cambridge, I’m seeing a lot more cyclists. And a question occurred to me…

If a cyclist has one of those flashing/strobing LED cycle-lamps at a high-flash-rate, and they ride towards a driver prone to epilepsy through strobing (which isn’t something one would normally/usually expect to encounter while driving) who is responsible for any damages etc. should that driver suffer a fit at the wheel?

I’ve seen four or five cyclists already with these super-bright LED lamps set to a *very* high strobe rate, and it just made me wonder…

Ominous Omens

On my commute, there is one road that is always a pain in the tits – the A428 between St Neots and Cambridge. It’s single-carriageway (i.e. one lane in each direction) and thus is the main sticking point on the entire journey (the rest of which is dual-carriageway).  Because it’s also the quickest/shortest link from Cambridge to the A1, it’s prone to use by a lot of heavy vehicles – trucks, lorries, and even cranes.

On the journey in this morning, there were a lot of cones by the side of the road, all laid out and ready to be deployed. Oh bollocks.

It turns out (not that you can tell from the Highways Agency website, which is unutterably fucking shit, and a nightmare to get information from) that there’ll be work going on there for the next month. They don’t say what’s going to be done, or whether it’s limited to non-stupid hours (it won’t be) but it may just make the commute a bit more interesting.

I’ll know more tonight once I’ve done the drive home, and see how it all goes. Alternatively, it’s going to be a case of finding alternative routes for the next month…

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