What is it about the people you have to work with? There's always some little pillock who thinks they're the main cog, around which the entire company revolves. Finanace departments are the worst for it - everyone in them thinks they're essential to the company, and yet even there there's some little knobber who thinks they do everything, when you can pretty much guarantee they do fuck all.

  Actually - why is it you can always tell the people who do fuck all by the fact that they insist they do everything, that they work harder than anyone else in the office, and that they're essential to the workplace, as if the company will fall apart without this one person in the department. It's the same in so many avenues of life - you can tell the people who can't do whatever they're bragging about, purely and simply by the fact that they're bragging that they can do it. Now maybe this is just a vile generalisation, and maybe I'm just a bigoted prat, but it still seems to me that everytime you hear some cretin going on about How great they are at x, y or z, then the instant reaction is either "bollocks" or "prove it" - because while they're gibbering on about being great, you just know it's insecurity speaking.

  Look at it this way - how many times have you been told by someone that they're a great lover, only to find them to be a 2 pumps and a squirt inadequate. I've shared houses with people who claimed to be great Buddhists, supposedly totally enlightened human beings, yet they were the most self-obsessed judgemental pigheaded lower primates it's ever been my misfortune to share a house with. In Internet chat, you always see the gimps who think they're God's Gift to something or other, normally they know how to help everyone in the chatroom with the problems in their lives (one almost wants to reintroduce them to the psychological phenomenon known as "denial") - and you end up wondering how utterly self-obsessed they must be to actually think they can do that.

  Come to that, how come all the people you see claiming they're so great in bed are always single? If they're that fantastic, surely they would be quite a catch, but yet they're always the single ones, or they're the ones begging for cyber-sex. And when we get right down to it, what the hell is the point in cyber-sex anyway? It's just a wank with delusions of grandeur, except you end up with at least one thing that's fucked. However, it's normally the keyboard. Maybe it's the keyboard manufacturers that are behind the entire cyber-sex phenomenon - keeping up the demand for replacement items.

  But anyway, I digress. What the hell, it's my site, and I'm allowed to. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah - big headed little teenage cretins who think they're great. What the hell, you get the idea. I started working (just temping, the glamourous world of website owners, eh?) in the finance department of a certain UK medical healthcare company that shall remain nameless (but it's pronunciation rhymes with Super) and yes, there's a little knobber there who's already driving me up the wal. Unfortunately, it's becoming more obvious. Ah well.

  Anyway, I guess I can't complain about people saying they're good at something when they're not. This was supposed to be a rant, and hasn't turned into one. Maybe the next one will. In the meantime, I'll just slope off with my head hung in shame.

  Cybersex, anyone?