One day I’ll learn.

I’ll learn that me and Absolut, particularly the Mandarin flavour (and especially following ahem pints of Budvar), get on very well, but it does absolutely stuff all for my balance. So when I then go walking across grassy areas where dew has fallen, and slip into some kind of dip in the ground, I hit that ground like a sack of shit, twisting my ankle to buggery in the process. Einstein I’m not.

Of course, the fact it was in front of a shitload of people, and must have looked like a comedy sketch, disappearing behind the hedge thing like that, well, that’s entirely a side bonus.

But at least I didn’t smash it to shit like I did a few years back, twisting it so badly that the tendons pulled out of their anchors in the bones of my ankle. That one really did hurt. This time it’s just a light shade of mauve, and swelled up last night, but it’s OK today.

All the same, I feel like a cretin for doing it. I’ll learn, one day.

And after that big rant Levis with radiation shield mobile phone pockets made me laugh like a village idiot.

I’m going to put in a quote from THAT site again, because the more I think about it, the more it bugs me.
Before we go any further, I just want to point out that yes, I was a gimp, and yes, this is a satire site. It _is_ well written, and very satirical. My personal feelings are that it’s just a little too believable, and still probably accepted by other people as being valid, but yes, mea culpa, I bit. For that, respect is due.

What do we want?

We want the law changed to make it illegal to murder children and bury them in woodland. We want it to be made illegal for adults to work with children. We want an end to the ridiculous process of ‘criminal trials’ for suspected child killers.

Point one : We want the law changed to make it illegal to murder children and bury them in woodland. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it’s already illegal to do this. Nice try Einstein.

Point two : We want it to be made illegal for adults to work with children. OK – so no adults working with children. What about things like schools? No teachers allowed near children? Police can’t come near a child no matter what, or the police break the law? Nannies/child minders become a black industry because what they’re doing is illegal. No schools, playgroups, playschemes in the summer. What about Childrens TV? They’re adults who work with kids.

Lord of the Flies, anyone? (and a link to the video, just for the hate mobs with a short attention span)
About the only good part of this one is that I suppose it would also be illegal for the parents to have contact with the kids, so that’s a bonus.

NEXT!

Point three : We want an end to the ridiculous process of ‘criminal trials’ for suspected child killers.
So what do you want instead? Hate mobs picking on the wrong people, vigilante lynchings, and the odd simple beating to death?

Criminal trials are fallible, yes – but to my mind they’re the best option. They could be improved, but given a choice between a fallible court system and a lynching based on rumour and hate, I’d go for the courts every time.

And before “concerned parent” gets on his little “have you read the site?” soapbox, or decides I don’t know what the fuck I’m on about, I’ll tell you now, I was abused for three years, the person who did it wasn’t a family member, and I still wouldn’t want to see him lynched by a mob in the street. I’d rather see him in jail for a long time, but that won’t happen either. But vigilante mobs bring out the shivers in me – if they come in for one crime, what’s to stop them becoming more popular, until you get a screaming mob stoning to death shoplifters, gays, dopesmokers, and anyone who doesn’t fit “what’s right” in the minds of the mob?

Go for it, “concerned parent”, I want to see an intelligent comment or explanation. Because at the moment you’re breaking the law of the UK yourself by inciting violence and hatred. Nice move, Genius.

So AMAZINGLY wrong, it’s really quite impressive.

because i thought this picture was pretty, laura of mewing.net told me this: “you enjoy sitcoms, popcorn, horses, and perhaps surfboarding. you lost your virginity either very early (under the age of eleven) or very late (over the age of thirty). you take politics and religion very seriously, and when you were a kid, you had a penchant for getting lost in shopping malls and/or amusement parks. your favorite color is most likely blue or green, and you are terrified of spiders.”
whatever will laura tell you??

That is actually pretty much the total opposite of me – maybe Laura needs a kick in the head, or just some good healthy ElectroShock Therapy because I tell you, she’s fucking crap at people analysis…

Additional – 21:20 12th Sept
Something’s just occurred to me, looking at that picture on the page again – it’s actually very close to the d4d colours too. How sad is that?

What can I say?

“Sun readers against paedos” – now that’s got to be a headline somewhere along the line. Or “Rent A Mob” – truly scary.

Of course, the petition has it’s detractors, and it’s actually quite amusing to read. But the vein of the rest of the site leaves a very bad taste in the mouth.

With a mob mentality and group IQ like this, Paediatrician’s everywhere should be very scared indeed.

Update 22:30 12/09
Thanks, Concerned Parent, for your comment “You’ve read the site, right?” – Yeah, I’ve read the site, and rent-a-mob vigilante dickheads always worry me. Last time they tried it, you had mobs going after Paediatricians instead of paedophiles because of the ignorance of the mob. The fact you’re trying to organise mob rule is enough to make me see the flaw in the plan, let alone anything else.

NEXT!

Playlist

My thanks to the green fairy for bringing this list to my attention. It’s the list of all the songs that weren’t to be played during September 11th on US radio. And she’s right – some of them are brilliant. It’s virtually a radio show in itself.

My personal favourites? The bangles “Falling for the First Time”, Chi-Lites “Have you Seen Her”, “Knocking on Heaven’s Door” by anyone who’s covered it, Three Degrees “When will I see you again?”, Van Halen’s “Jump” and my ultimate favourite, Tom Petty’s “Free Fallin'”.

But how come they missed things like Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s “Two Tribes”, “War (what is it good for)” by anyone, Leonard Cohen’s “Tower of Song”, Bloodhound Gang’s “The Roof is on Fire”, or Steve Earle’s “John Walker Blues”, which (as Elayne pointed out) was played on one of the radio stations (by someone who probably wants to get sacked, admittedly). A story on CNN is here.

What other ones could/should go on the banned list?

Some respect to NBC. I just remembered that in last Friday’s Will and Grace (yes, I watch it – so sue me) Jack mentioned his website www.justjack.com. So being a sad pedantic person, I thought I’d try it out. And what do you know? It exists. Not as perfect as it could have been, but at least it exists and is relevant.