Ticketed – Update
Posted: Mon 10 April, 2023 Filed under: Customer Services, Cynicism, Driving, Milton Keynes, Pedantry 3 Comments »Following on from the post a couple of weeks ago about getting a parking ticket and the poor wording on the back of it, I got a response from Milton Keynes Council…
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. The wording on the back of the PCN was checked and this was an oversight on Milton Keynes City Council.
We have notified the Parking Contract Manager of this error and he has contacted the manager of the enforcement contractors, SABA to request this paragraph is amended as soon possible.
So somehow apparently no-one had noticed this error, and no-one else had written in to point it out. Which is kind of scary in and of itself…
Ticketed
Posted: Sat 25 March, 2023 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Milton Keynes, Pedantry, Stupidity Leave a comment »This morning, I got given a parking ticket – incorrectly, as it happens, and it’s already been challenged.
However, on reading the back of the ticket, I came across this gem
Click to embiggenify
For those who don’t want to enlarge the text, what it says is :
If the penalty charge is not paid [wordy guff] or has been successfully challenged, the Council may serve a Notice To Owner (NTO) on the owner of the vehicle requiring payment of the penalty charge.
Now, I know what they mean, but that’s not what they say. The implication here (as I read it) is “If you’ve successfully challenged the ticket, we can still come after you for the money“.
So, I’ve raised that as an issue as well, which should be interesting – or at least entertaining!
Offering A Service
Posted: Wed 27 September, 2017 Filed under: Advertising, Cynicism, Domestic, Milton Keynes, Pedantry, Thoughts 2 Comments »Every few days, I go past this office, and re-notice the window…
It’s a solicitor’s office, and I still can’t figure out whether they’re offering Abduction as a service to their clients (along with Domestic Violence!) or whether they actually mean they offer services based around Abduction and recovery of Abductees.
Either way, it always strikes me as an odd one to advertise – and even more so when it’s not clear what they’re actually doing.
Advertising Standards
Posted: Sat 27 August, 2016 Filed under: Advertising, Bad Ads, Customer Services, Domestic, Food, Getting Organised, Loyalty Schemes, Marketing, OpenTable, Pedantry, Solo Dining, Stupidity, Thoughts Leave a comment »With the whole “Solo Dining” project I’ve been doing this year, one of my bugbears has become OpenTable (who provide a lot of the table-reservation services for restaurants) and – more particularly – their “Dining Points” loyalty plan.
As it says on that page about Dining Points,
OpenTable UK members can earn OpenTable Dining Points when they make and honor reservations made through opentable.com, or our related mobile sites and apps.
They say the same thing on another modal window to explain Dining Points.
“Earn points every time you dine”
Except that’s not true – not true at all. I queried why I’d received zero points for several reservations over the last year, and they then started to say (and this is a direct quote from one of the responses)
points are only given to diners who start their search on our website and not the restaurants website as you know. This is because as you came from the restaurant website, you are considered a customer of the restaurant and they use our services on the back end to take your reservation for them. If we started awarding points to the customers of our clients they would feel that we are trying to steal you as a customer.
So OpenTable are, frankly, liars. They say clearly throughout the site “make a booking through OpenTable, and get points“, with no provisos, asterisks, or get-out clauses. This isn’t even me being pedantic about something – they’ve said something (repeatedly, in black-and-white!) that’s simply not true.
This would’ve been an easy fix for OpenTable, if they’d had any sense at all. If they’d said “Oh, sod, sorry, here, have the points, and we’ll make that text clearer“, we’d be done. But no, they started backtracking, patronising, and explaining why I was so wrong to believe their “Get points every time you book” spiel. No apology, no “thanks for letting us know“, nothing. All the customer-service skills of a concrete monolith.
Having hit that concrete monolith with no joy, I decided to take it further. Having checked their criteria, I raised it with the ASA (Advertising Standards Authority) and I’ve now had a confirmation from them that, having done an initial review, they’re going to investigate it further.
So, that’s going to be entertaining. I’m assuming that getting an ASA investigation done isn’t a trivial step, nor one that the ASA do for the fun of it. I’m also assuming that, because they’re investigating, the complaint has at least some merit.
As and when I hear back, I’ll write more here…
Statistics
Posted: Fri 10 October, 2014 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Driving, Media, News, Pedantry Leave a comment »On the news last night, there was a story about how rural roads are more dangerous/deadly than motorways (which just makes sense to me – of which more in a minute) and one of their illustrations of this was this road sign
This is supposedly a sign from “one of the more dangerous roads” – but 43 injuries in 3 years equates to 14 (point 3-recurring) deaths a year. That’s just over one a month. Not quite such a scary figure… The same goes with 4 deaths in three years – just over 1 a year.
I don’t know if my viewpoint is a rarity, but I look at a statistic like that, and tend to think “I’ll go with those odds”.
And now, about those stats in the first place…
The stats in the story are :
- 3 people a day die on rural roads
- That’s 11 times more deaths than on motorways
To me, that all makes sense, for a number of reasons – including…
- On motorways, people drive faster – but (in general) pay more attention when doing so. Sure, there’s still idiots – there’s idiots everywhere – but in general people are paying a bit more attention on motorways.
- People definitely pay less attention – and drive worse – on non-motorway roads.
- But also – on motorways, everyone’s going in the same direction. It’s *far* harder to have a head-on collision at speed on a motorway.
- The speeds are higher, but with everyone going in the same direction, it also reduces the relevant impact speed. A head-on is the sum of the two impact speeds – so two cars hitting head-on at 60mph is an impact speed of 120mph. Even if you’ve got someone at 70 on a motorway hitting a stationary vehicle, that’s an impact speed of 70.
- It’s not the same factor if you were to crash into someone ahead of you (for example) because they’re still going forward at 60-70mph anyway, so – as I understand it – if you’re going 70mph, and hit someone going at 60mph, the *impact* speed is 10mph – the difference, rather than the sum.
The other key factor is that I’m willing to bet that there’s one hell of a lot more miles of rural road in the UK than Motorway. In 2005, the DfT’s report said that the UK has 2,202 miles (3,523 km) of motorways. According to this document, the UK’s motorways account for 1% – ONE PERCENT – of the total road space/distance. So again, 11 times more deaths on roads that account for 99 times the road mileage.
All told, it’s just bad stats and shitty journalism
Attention To Detail
Posted: Fri 9 May, 2014 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Education, Literacy, Pedantry, Thoughts Leave a comment »While filling in my postal vote last night, I noticed this on the paperwork…
The red dot is added by me, just to highlight the error.
But really, how can I be assured that my local authority is capable of anything efficient when they can’t even get things right on a bloody envelope?
You Had One Job…
Posted: Sun 23 February, 2014 Filed under: Advertising, Agency Idiocy, Cynicism, Pedantry, Stupidity Leave a comment »While out and about this weekend, I spotted this sign, and simply had to stop and take a picture of it…
Romans Estate Agents, you had one job, and this is what you get…
(Amusingly, their website also claims “a thorough approach to every aspect of our business”)
It’s a Pie
Posted: Tue 18 February, 2014 Filed under: Advertising, Bad Ads, Cinema, Cynicism, Marketing, Media, Pedantry, Writing Leave a comment »Another in the occasional series of “adverts that annoy me” – this one is one of the ones from Santander (which I still think are creepy, as I have said before)
Why does it annoy me? Again, because of one line.
At the start, we can see that the guy is making a pie, and putting a pastry lattice over the top. Yet the woman says
“I really like what you’re doing with that cake”
It’s a fucking pie, you idiot.
Bad Writing
Posted: Sun 16 February, 2014 Filed under: 1BEM, Advertising, Bad Ads, Cinema, Films, Pedantry, Writing Leave a comment »Recently my visits to the local cinema have included the trailer below, for a new film called “Winter’s Tale”
Within that trailer is the line
I’ve had no memory for as long as I can remember
which just drives me crackers. Seriously, people get paid for writing piss like that?
I mean, if you’ve no memory then of course it’s for as long as you can remember. Because you’ve got no fucking memory, you insufferable ballbag!
And breathe…
Pedantic Thoughts
Posted: Mon 3 February, 2014 Filed under: Cynicism, Pedantry, Public Transport, Travel Leave a comment »As my train arrived this morning, the platform announcement said “This is a 12-carriage train for London Euston. Please use all doors to get on this train”
Being a pedantic twat, my first thought was “Really? All of them? Can’t I just use the one in front of me?”
I need to get out more.
Errant
Posted: Sat 28 December, 2013 Filed under: Business, Central Bedfordshire Council, Own Business, Pedantry, Work-related Leave a comment »Over Christmas, my local council provided a wonderful example of why you should always double-check things – preferably with someone literate.
Yep – errant apostrophes all over the Festering Season.
As always, it’s the result of letting their website be managed by individuals rather than a team who are actually capable of things like proof-reading, literacy and the like. But it’s not a good thing at all.
Not What They Meant
Posted: Thu 11 July, 2013 Filed under: 1BEM, Cynicism, Media, Pedantry, People, Writing Leave a comment »Today in the EDP (well, on their website at least) there’s this headline
Murdered Wisbech pensioner’s niece makes emotional appeal six months after she was brutally stabbed to death and set on fire
Now, you know they mean “Niece makes emotional appeal six months after her pensioner aunt was brutally stabbed and set on fire“, but that’s not what it actually says.
So instead I’m going to be impressed at the moral strength of someone so distraught that she can make an appeal about a pensioner six months after being brutally stabbed and set on fire.
Yes, yes, I’m a bad person.
Reporting Potholes
Posted: Mon 4 March, 2013 Filed under: 1BEM, Customer Services, Driving, Getting Organised, Pedantry Leave a comment »One thing I’ve become a bit of an arse about over the last few months has been reporting potholes and road damage to the local council(s).
I’m not the only one doing it, I’m sure – but particularly with Bedfordshire it’s interesting to see the speed of response from when I’ve reported stuff to when it gets fixed.
I’m drawing the conclusion that it’s down to me because in some cases I’ve left the report for a month or more, with nothing happening. When I report it, it gets checked and fixed quite shortly afterwards. Now sure, it could be that my report is the one that breaks the limit on reporting – but not every time, I’m sure.
I know that councils are reducing their road repairs as part of all this austerity and cost-saving bollocks, but it’s a false economy. The costs/claims for damage are a big factor – and particularly claims are more likely to be paid up when the pothole has been reported (but not repaired) because that shows more of a disregard for maintenance.
I’m not interested in that side particularly. I am interested in getting decent road quality without dangerous potholes causing issues – both to myself and others.
Critical Reading
Posted: Fri 16 November, 2012 Filed under: Advertising, Creativity, Cynicism, Education, Food, Literacy, Pedantry, Thoughts 6 Comments »As has been observed many times over the years, I can be a really picky/pedantic bastard – particularly when it comes to spelling, punctuation, and literacy in general. And it’s true, I am all of those things.
Today I’ve been proof-reading a menu for the work Christmas Do (of which more at some other point) – and with some of the errors, had to check the original menu.
So – would you still go to a place whose menu has spelling errors? I realise that the typing and publication of the menu won’t have come direct from the chef, and will have been farmed out to someone on reception (or similar) – but really, if chefs / owners are so obsessed about control, wouldn’t that also extend to the menu, and how it represents the establishment ?
In this case, some of the spelling errors are pretty basic – Mascarpone , for example, is mis-spelled. In others, it’s the actual cooking techniques themselves, such as “Ballantine” instead of “Ballotine”. And I just find that a bit worrying – for if there’s that lack of attention to details in the menu, I can’t help but think there might be the same lack of attention when it comes to the food.
Shock, Horror
Posted: Wed 6 April, 2011 Filed under: 1BEM, Advertising, Cynicism, Daily Mail, Hypocrisy, Offensive Repetition, Pedantry, People, Thoughts 3 Comments »At least two different media sites are today carrying the story about the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) telling clothing company Jack Wills (ever heard of them? I hadn’t) to not continue publishing their current catalogue until certain images are changed.
The story’s on the BBC here – and on the scumrag Daily Mail here.
Only one of the two stories manages to also show the image in it’s full “offensive” version. Guess which one?
Yep, you got it – good old Daily Fail, making sure its readers know precisely what they should be offended by.
[Oh, and if you do want to know what the image is, look below the ‘More’ link]
Daily Fail
Posted: Fri 6 August, 2010 Filed under: 1BEM, Design, Media, News, Pedantry Leave a comment »Always nice to see when the Daily Fail gets to screw things up. (again)
In this case, they’ve managed to forget to put two photo captions in on one story. (This may have changed on the page by the time you look at it)
First example
Second example
Way to go, Daily Fail!
Apostrophe Question
Posted: Tue 2 February, 2010 Filed under: Literacy, Pedantry 4 Comments »One for the pedants out there (you know who you are) because for once I’m just not sure…
In Homebase over the weekend, I ended up looking at seed potato sets. I know, what a classy life. Anyway, reading the back (Hey, I was bored) I saw this…
Is this apostrophe errant or not?
I know that an apostrophe is used in the case of compressions (i.e. “there is” becoming “there’s”) but I’m fairly sure it doesn’t apply in the case of an abbreviation.
So to my knowledge this apostrophe is incorrect, but equally I’ve been known to be wrong on these finer points…
So – am I right? Or is this OK?