Getting Darker

Last weekend, we switched back from BST to GMT, which is just another major clue that winter is just about here. (If you’ve missed the storms/gales, fireworks, X-Factor, Strictly, autumn leaves, shorter days etc.)

Thankfully, the gaining of an hour doesn’t usually affect me too much – the loss of one in spring usually hits me a bit harder, but still not all that much.

However, it appears to have somewhat confused the cats, who really don’t know what to make of it all. Food times have been disrupted, as well as everything else.

What does affect me the most, though, is the fact that I’m now leaving work and driving home in the dark. I don’t mind night-time driving, but still I find the darkness affects me just because it reduces the amount of available sunlight I get during the day.  Indeed, the next time I’ll be even close to driving home in daylight is at the end of February.

As with previous years, I always found that the thing that affected me the most with getting home in the dark was getting back to an unlit house. Particularly when I was in Manchester, that return to a dark and empty house was very unpleasant, and since then I’ve always made a point of having at least one light on a timeswitch, so it’s on when I get home.  It’s a ridiculous thing, but it makes such a massive difference in my head – very strange.


Legalised

It’s now two years since my little spat with Ian Corbett (of Toyota Ireland) and his legal advisors was completed.  I said at the time that the way they’d requested things to work out wouldn’t actually get rid of the search engine results that annoyed him so much. But he’s a marketing manager, so one assumes he knows these things, and that I would be wrong.

On a random whim, I searched the other day on Google for said person – and lo, I was right. Even when searching for just name + company (with no mention of D4D™ at all) up comes D4D™ with a nice healthy 4th place in the search results. And now there’s also Google Images, I can also see what the glaikit bawbag looks like, too.

All told, I can’t deny, I do find this very amusing. And there’s nothing at all I can do about it, it’s all in the hands of That There Google.


Time Out

This week (and some of next) I’m actually on leave from the job. This is A Very Good Thing.

I don’t have much in the way of plans, the main thing is just Not Working, and taking the much-needed time out.

Of course, there are things I want to do, or at least get onto “paper” and out of my head, but that’s all going to be done on my terms, rather than within the demands of an office.

I’m sure there’ll be a couple of days out and the like along the way, but really the main thing is just time out. It’s been a pretty hectic first third of the year, and the next one isn’t looking like it’ll be any quieter, so downtime is definitely a good plan.


Catching Up, and Updates

This year, I’ve actually sent out Christmas Cards – not something I always do, by any means. It’s also been a way of making sure people have new address details, as I know in some cases I’ve been utterly crap with keeping friends up to date on where I am. (And in some cases I know my addresses take up more than a page in their address books)

It’s been a good thing, too. I’ve caught up with a couple of friends whose situations had changed quite radically – one who’s now married, and one who’s now separated, as well as another who’s had a number of relatives with hospital-based issues and the like.

All told, it’s been a worthwhile exercise. I do feel slightly guilty for being a shit mate and not knowing these things already, but at least I know now, so it could be worse.

And now just to get on with the actual catching up…


Finished for the Year

Today was my last day in the office ’til 2013 – for which no-one is more amazed than me.  I’m now off for no less than 13 days – allbeit covering the Festering Season – which is going to be very strange.

Honestly, I can’t remember the last time I was off work for that long (and particularly being off on proper Holiday pay, rather than just not working) but it’s going to be good to have the time. Indeed, I’m currently so tired and wiped out, just having the time is a real bonus.

I don’t know yet what I’m going to do with most of my leave, other than relax. There’s some bits planned, which will all be good, but primarily, relaxing and preparing for 2013 will be the main objectives.

And it’s going to be needed – one of my final actions today was to list the projects my team will be working on for the first three months. Suffice it to say, it’s a big damn list, with 17 projects (as well as ongoing projects) between three of us…


What’s Next ?

Looking back over the archives, it’s now five years (nearly 5 years 1 month, in fact) since I moved (with Herself) into the first house I’d owned, or been involved in owning. (And still the only house, actually) Which means that it’s eight years since I got together with Herself – and it’s also seven and a half years since I left Manchester, but that’s less relevant to this post.

Now, five years on, I’m back to being on my own, back in a rented place.  It wasn’t entirely my choice, more a conclusion to plenty of events in the run-up, but it’s where things are, and I’m going to try and make the best of it.

The thing is, I don’t really feel like I’ve made any progress in those eight years. Sure, there’ve been lots of changes, and lots of stuff has happened, but when all’s said and done, have I progressed? No – indeed I’d say I’m in a worse situation than I was back then.

Back in 2004, I was working – admittedly at a job I didn’t much like – and doing OK. My finances were up-and-down, more so than they should’ve been, but I really only had debts of £1,000 at any one time – my bank overdraft, and that was it. The house was rented, and was OK. I didn’t drive (ah, OK, that’s progress) – but I didn’t need to, with a decent transport system at my door. Sure, longer travel was more of a pain, but I was used to that.

Now, I’m working – at a job I like, but don’t want to do Forever – and my finances are shit. I owe a significant amount of money, and know it’s going to take a long time to sort that out. That debt has been my own choice, to a degree, but I’m not happy about it, and I want to get rid of it. It’s just that sometimes that looks like a bit of an insurmountable task.  The house is rented, and is OK. I do drive, and have a car, so yeah, that’s progress.

I don’t have any assets, realisable or not, and I don’t really have anything of merit going for me right now.

The job? It’s OK – even good – but it’s not really what I want to do any more. Except I don’t know what I do want to do, either.

And with everything else going on, I most certainly don’t feel like I’ve anything to offer anyone else. I don’t want anyone else either, so it’s not all bad, but it’s the feeling that’s just a bit grim right now. All I’m going to focus on for the foreseeable is getting myself sorted out, figuring out what I want to do/be, finding what (if anything) makes me happy, and all that jazz. It’s not reinvention time, but it is – I think – rediscovery time.

What’s going to come next? I honestly don’t know. This is either a new beginning that leads to something interesting, or it’s the beginning of the end. Who knows which way it’ll go? Not me, that’s for sure.

[Note : I’m just having a down day. Not great, not by a long chalk. But I’ll get through it, one way or t’other]


2012 – The next twelve months

This year I’m not going to lay down a big old list of plans. They rarely work out, or I’m just too ambitious – or other things take over.

Take last year’s list, for example :

  • Write more
  • Take more photos
  • Do more websites
  • Get more business
  • Pay stuff off
  • Get off the antidepressants

Not much, really. Yet most of it didn’t quite happen. Work and life got in the way, and things just didn’t quite happen.

Mind you, I did get off the antidepressants, and I did take photos when I got the chance, so that’s not too bad. I also completed a fair few websites, and some other projects – just not for myself.

I think I’ll be keeping the same basic list for this year though.  It’s written with the best of intentions – but the knowledge that things change, including my motivation.  But I think the 2012 list will be (in no particular order) :

  • Write more
  • Photograph more
  • Owe less
  • Weigh less

And that’ll do, I think.