Genocide is painless

When the weather gets warm, what is it that makes peoples IQs drop so significantly? I’ve just been out, and the quota of braindeads is even more than usual. Maybe the sun just brings them out of the woodwork or something – from the sheer lack of brains I’ve witnessed so far though, I’d be surprised that they can manage to negotiate complex activities like opening doors, or walking and breathing at the same time.

I think the first thing that must get melted out of the brain is the decision-making section. Everyone seems to be so aimless, wandering around with even less clue than usual, displaying all the IQ and personality of a road-kill walrus. The really worrying thing is that most of these keff-wits are also breeding – all of them were either pregnant, or dragging/pushing (depending on the ownership of pushchair/buggy) round some snotty wailing brat. I know that they say there’s a partner for everyone, but sometimes I do start considering whether a programme of eugenics wouldn’t be the way to go.

Actually, eugenics and birth-control would only hit the tip of the iceberg. But the concept of genocide opens up a whole world of opportunity…

The truth will out

Ah well, it had to be proved at some point. First I’m geeky enough to take The Geek Test, and then to reveal that I scored 44.18146% – which makes me a Major Geek. Apparently. *coughs* Of course, anyone who knows me would be amazed that the score was that low. *Grin*

Heatwave

I don’t want to be overly British and go stating the obvious by saying “Bloody Hell it’s hot today“. So instead I’m going to comment about another phenomenon from heatwaves, and basically whenever the temperature goes above about 15°C (60°F, for anyone outside the UK) – the fact that some people really fucking stink.

(as an aside here, I should point out that yes, I do know I’ve ranted about this subject before)

I don’t know what it is about this country, but it certainly seems that there’s a facet of the nation that simply don’t wash or use deodorant (I’m going to stick with an Americanised spelling on that one, because deodourant still doesn’t look right) – I know there are some facets who won’t use it for religious reasons etc., and fair enough, I’m not going to aim this at them. But the others, the offensively smelly fuckers, deserve to be shot. How can they not realise how bad it is? And even how antisocial? In fact, I’d go so far as to say it’s just fucking vile.

In the office where I’m currently working, there’s one person who obviously suffers from this condition (known in medical circles as “stinkyfuckeritis”) to an epic degree. It’s hard to be subtle about it – the temptation to walk over and tell him he stinks is getting more tempting by the minute, and I don’t even sit near him. I pity the poor sods who sit opposite, because every time he walks past me, the smell is enough to pole-axe a mastodon. It seems to carry a physical force to it, because wherever he walks, people are reeling afterwards.

There’s not even any real escape at lunchtime – walking into town there were at least two others suffering the same problem, and it’s exceptionally difficult to walk uphill without inhaling at some point. The town is full of scrots in tracksuit bottoms, who seem to feel that these temperatures are a grand excuse to strip off and show how amazingly shonky their cheap nasty tatoos are, and how well they’ve already faded. Oh, and how well dodgy gold necklaces go with pasty scally skin.

Personally, I’ll be glad when the clouds come over again, and the temperature drops. Now, has anyone got some horse-shit so I can tone down the smelly bastard?

Look out for thistles

The concept of “boots-only” hiking (that’s hiking in the nude, for those who care about such things) conjures up a whole range of images – very few of them particularly pleasant. In weather like today, I imagine that sunburn is a pretty relevant issue – and considering that half the vegetation on hiking routes is either Gorse (fucking prickly) or Heather (bloody abrasive) I would think there’s a fairly good risk of ending up scratched all over. Which is enough to make most people wimper a bit.

However, the random sightings of two naked men hiking The Pennine Way made me smile, another sign of the eccentricity for which we’re world renowned. Particularly with the female witness who “absent-mindedly” bumped into one of the men – I wonder what she was paying attention to? *Grin*

Uneventful

So far, it’s been a fairly quiet day. It won’t last, I’m sure. In the meantime, I’d just like to say that converting Adobe PDFs so that they can be filled in on-line is a task of utter wankdom, and not one I enjoy. So of course that’s what I’ll be doing for most of today. *Sigh*

Lame Academy

Please God, we’re beginning to see the end of the “reality” game-show. The BBC’s Lame Academy has managed to lose one million viewers in a week. 50% more people watched Grease on ITV than watched Lame Academy – now that’s really rubbing it in. This Saturday, ITV’s Flop Idol is back (again) – let’s hope it crashes and burns like most of the audtionees do.

Return to normality

Since the swap of domain names for d4d™, there’s been a bit of a dip in the regular hits from search engines. In some ways this has been no bad thing at all, as it’s allowed me to drop a couple of very old bits that I no longer wanted on d4d™ without too many hassles. And now I’m starting to get search hits from Google again, so it looks like the resumption of normal service is continuing apace.

And I really must get my finger out on some of the stuff I want to play with on d4d™ after the first birthday is out of the way. With all the other stuff that’s been going on, it now might not happen in time for Friday (ye gods, a year already – how did that happen?) but it’s in the process of happening.