Omens
Posted: Thu 14 July, 2005 Filed under: Thoughts, Travel, Weirdness 4 Comments »You know, there’s a sign that you’re about to have a bad day. It’s this :
You get on a train, (or any form of public transport, but in today’s case, it’s a train) sit down, and opposite you there’s a woman clutching the cross on her necklace, and singing hymns to herself. At a volume high enough to make the tune identifiable (Closer My God To Thee, I think it’s called) but also at a pitch spookily resembling the “mosquito buzzing in the ear” level of irritation.
Thank Chuff I only had to go ten minutes with it.
Nutter.
Monitors
Posted: Wed 13 July, 2005 Filed under: Geeky, Weirdness 3 Comments »On the subject (well, almost) of multitasking, a geeky set-up question…
At work, I’ve got a dual-monitor set-up. Monitor One comes through the DVI plug, and works fine. The other one comes through the normal DSUBoutput (I think it’s DSUB- whatever the standard plug for video output is, anyway). This works fine in most circumstances.
However, on the second monitor, I can’t see video playback through Real – whether it comes from BBC or wherever, I get the audio, but not the video. Any ideas why?
Froggin’ Expensive
Posted: Tue 28 June, 2005 Filed under: Customer Services, Weirdness 3 Comments »Well, colour me shocked. There’s a story on the BBC News today about how signing up to the Crazy Bastard Frog (CBF) ringtone costs people a lot more than they expect. Basically, if you signed up to get the CBF, you’ve then signed up to Jamster‘s shite from now ’til the end of eternity. (and yes, pedants, I know that technically eternity never ends, but bollocks, I’m using the expression anyway) Or, in fairness, ’til you get enough IQ points to text “STOP” to whatever number it is. (if memory serves, I think that’s the code – see, I do pay attention to the adverts)
The whining twat on the BBC says this:
I did not spot the impossibly small print whizzing by on the bottom of the screen while a larger-than-a life Crazy Frog gyrated to his latest tones.If I had, it would apparently have informed me that by ordering the ringtone I had also signed up to a subscription.
The watchdog’s 2004 code says pricing information must be spoken on television adverts if maximum call costs can exceed £2. The code also states that “textual pricing information must be easily legible, prominent… presented in a way that does not require close examination”.
©BBC News 2005
She then goes on to say “I couldn’t find anything about this on the Jamster site”. Well, madam, then you’re obviously as thick as pigshite. If you click on the “Terms and Conditions” link on any Jamster Page (yes, I’ve just looked at the site for the first time ever you get to see this :
To unsubscribe by text message, text “STOP” to 88888, call 0870 121 3186 or go to “My Clubs” under “My Jamster!” on www.jamster.co.uk or send an email to info@jamster.co.uk. The termination shall become effective immediately upon receipt of termination request.
© Jamster 2005
Rocket science this isn’t.
So far as I can see, the entire Jamster ringtones thing is just like an idiot tax anyway – if you don’t read the text at the bottom (and I have – it’s not difficult so long as you don’t need to read aloud, or follow the words with your fucking finger) and just subscribe then a) you’re an idiot, and b) you’re fair game to get ripped off. This whine masquerading as news just goes to illustrate the point.
Rainy
Posted: Fri 24 June, 2005 Filed under: Thoughts, Weirdness 3 Comments »Hallelujah, the weather’s broken and it’s finally raining for a while. I’ve just been out in it, and I think it’s the first time I’ve been cool in a week.
What does amaze me though is – unsurprisingly – how stupid people are. While in the shops, every other person in the queue was complaining that it was raining now, and it’d been fine when they left for work, so they hadn’t bothered with jackets/ umbrellas/ whatever.
I’m sorry, but the weather reports have been full of this for a week. “Friday’s going to bring rain, storms, thunder, lightning”. Every report I’ve seen has said that. It’s even been on the BBC news website. Hard to miss that level of information, really, isn’t it. But no, because there was sun in the sky at 8am, everyone seems to have assumed that it’ll be fine all day, and they don’t need anything, despite all the stories to the contrary. And then they’re complaining about it. I despair.
As for the fuckwits who just stand in doorways waiting for the rain to stop, words fail me. Particularly when you try to get past them, and they just give you an incredulous look, as if to say “But it’s raining. You can’t go outside in that. You’ll melt or something.” It’s bloody water. Nothing more, nothing less. It’s cool, and when all’s said and done, I’ll dry off. Now fuck off and get out of my way, you poor pathetic cuntwit bastard.
MP3 playlist
Posted: Fri 24 June, 2005 Filed under: Music, Weirdness 2 Comments »I’m on a train later tonight, and I’ve just been thinking (again) about how surreal my music tastes can be.
The MP3 player is currently loaded with the following albums :
- Alabama3’s “Outlaw” (which is bloody good, it has to be said)
- NIN’s “With Teeth”
- The The’s “Hanky Panky” (a set of Hank Williams covers)
- Daddy G’s “DJ Kicks” compilation (mainly dub and reggae – very mellow)
- Marc Almond’s “Tenement Symphony” (camper than a row of tents)
- KLF’s “White Room” album
That’s a fair selection of genres in there. And yet to me it makes sense in a scary kind of way. And also (to me) flows pretty nicely.
Pedestrians – again
Posted: Wed 15 June, 2005 Filed under: Thoughts, Travel, Weirdness 3 Comments »I wish I understood people who walk. Bearing in mind that I’m one of them, you’d think that gaining an insight on the mindset wouldn’t be that difficult, but no, it is.
So far as I can tell, a great majority of pedestrians are – frankly – fucking stupid. Or suicidal. I haven’t quite figured out which yet. For instance, I completely fail to understand the way people – particularly couples – have to walk side-by-side and/or hand-in-hand, and block an entire pathway. Especially when it’s a subway or similar, and there’s no alternative way past. Why do it? Are they “so in love” </vomit> that they can’t bear to be seperated for even 3o seconds?
Equally (and I know I’ve mentioned this before) I don’t understand why some fuckwit cunts idiots have to walk on the cycle-path when there’s a perfectly good footpath right beside it. It makes life really bloody awkward, and even more so when they don’t have any spatial awareness of what’s going on around them – although I do tend to yell “Get out the fucking way” when they’ve also ignored the bike bell. Sometimes I don’t bother with the bell, and just yell at them anyway…
I also simply don’t get how people can walk out into a road (and in one recent case, a dual carriageway) without looking to see what’s coming. Do they believe they’re invincible? Or that all road-users will simply stop for them?
ID card
Posted: Thu 9 June, 2005 Filed under: Thoughts, Weirdness 1 Comment »The other day I saw a car sticker advertising the website No2ID.net – underneath which was a slogan about “don’t join the database state”.
Now, I figure that this guy who’s so anti the ID card programme (and fair play to him, because I’m against a lot of the factors in it too) has probably sent off for this car sticker from the website, and as such his name and address have (unless No2ID.net have a specific system that doesn’t store such information) been added to the database of the site.
So, a database of people who don’t want to be in the database. Ironic, isn’t it?