Updating

One thing I do very irregularly is update software. A case in point is iTunes. Or “Fucking iTunes”, as it’s known in this house.

Now fair enough, I get why a program can’t be running while it upgrades itself. That’s fine. It makes sense.

But in the name of all that’s fucking holy, why the blue blazing shit does iTunes need to shut down Fucking Microsoft Outlook while it upgrades?!? I could understand (ish) restarting a web browser. But email? (And yes, before any techie spod gets a hold on this one, I know poxy Outlook uses the IE rendering engine for HTML emails – well , until Outlook’07, anyway – but that’s a rant for another day. Oh yes.)

Even more annoying, if I tell it to “Ignore” the problem with Outlook, it goes back, tries again – and still insists that Outlook gets shut down. Apple has the funniest fucking perspective on the word “Ignore”, doesn’t it?

And then, not content with fucking about with poxy bloody email, once the upgrade is over and done with, it tells me it also needs to restart the entire fucking PC. Why?!?

And when all’s said and done, what sits there in the fucking system tray again? Oh yes, it’s Quicktime. Which I drop from the system tray every bastard time, because it’s a system-hungry piece of shit that doesn’t pissing bastard well need to be running every time I start the PC. If I want a fucking Quicktime movie to play, I’ll wait the extra ten bloody seconds for the fucking thing to start. That’s fine. I don’t care. But stop running in my fucking system tray all the time, you bastard piece of crap.

And then people reckon I should buy an iPod as well. Fucking Apple. I wouldn’t touch their hardware with a syphilitic leper’s dick.


Infantile

At the moment, one of the people in the department isn’t talking to me. I’ve obviously done something wrong, but couldn’t quite tell you what it is. The list has a few options on, so *shrug*.

However, when someone is ‘not talking to me’, I can’t deny that I become extremely childish. I keep on asking the person questions, or just generally involving them in conversations, so that they damn well have to talk to me.

I know, I know, it’s childish and infantile. But at the same time it’s also bloody funny – not just to me, but to the rest of the people in the team as well. And thus I feel slightly vindicated.


Terrorism Bollocks

On the way home last night, I got ‘stop and search’ed in the entrance hall of Cambridge station under the auspices of the Terrorism Act 2000. It wasn’t for any reason, just part of the random shite during ‘heightened’ alerts.

Now, in general I don’t really have a problem with the stop-and-search stuff. I got used to it a long time ago, when I was in the throes of heavy insomnia, and would regularly get stopped and searched at 4am when I was out for a walk. I understand the principles of it, and the Bentham-esque supposed panopticism, where the theory goes that if you are under constant scrutiny, you never know when They really are watching you. It’s the same motive that underlies all the CCTV crap, and many other bits of our current legal surveillance framework.

What I do object to is that when I get stop-and-searched, the search is so cursory as to be utterly fucking pointless. Yesterday’s one was a case in point.

All they did was look in my backpack. That was it. I didn’t have to turn on the laptop that was in there, to ‘prove’ that it wasn’t an explosive device cunningly disguised. I didn’t have to open the bottle of water there, to prove it was water, and not some colourless liquid explosive. They didn’t even open the pockets on the bag – at least one of which was heavy with portable hard-drive, USB stick, headphone cables, metal pen, and some other stuff that had all the hallmarks of a small explosive device. (electronics, wires, small compact box, blah blah)

They didn’t check me at all. I could’ve had weapons on me, small gas canisters (those little gas capsules for CO2, for example) or been wired to chuff and back – hell, my entire belly area could’ve been padding and C4. But none of it was checked.

And let’s be honest, if I were some numpty bent on self-immolation with a C4 waistcoat or whatever, would a stop-and-search have any effect? Would it bollocks. If I were that dedicated/committed to blowing myself to kingdom come, and taking as many people as possible with me, (which I must emphasise to the hard-of-thinking I am most certainly not) then fuck it, the rail station entrance hall is as good a place as any. And ooh look, the chance to take out three or four policemen as well. Bonus.

Would stop-and-search have been of any use in the current wave of so-called ‘attacks’. Would it bollocks. Well, unless they’ve a method for using stop-and-search against oncoming burning vehicles, or ones being driven at speed towards the station.

And when all’s said and done, that’s what I object to – the fact that the entire thing is just staged shit to make people ‘feel’ more secure. It’s got no practical use whatsoever. Maybe iit would’ve had some use f I’d started sweating, or praying, or some other massive giveaway. I doubt it though.


2012 Logo

OK, now just what the fuck is the new logo for the London 2012 Olympics supposed to be representing?

logo for London 2012 Olympics

The old logo with the outline of the Thames running through it at least made sense.

This one looks more like a four-year-old has been playing with pink post-it® notes and scissors…

EDIT : Ok, having looked at the logo a bit more, I can now discern the ‘2012’ in the pink bits of the logo. So it makes a bit more sense now. Still looks like shite to me though. Then again, I’m neither a designer nor a marketer.


Stupid?

When I first read this story about drivers not recognising various road signs I figured that it was hardly news to know that two-thirds of the drivers surveyed couldn’t identify the ‘no through road’ sign, or that a third didn’t recognise the ‘no motor vehicles’ one.

But when it got to the second section, about the signs that (supposedly) people did want, I just despaired.

I’m sorry, but how is a sign saying ‘Wifi Zone’ going to help things? Or one saying ‘Drive-Through Approaching’? (although I bet Mac-fucking-donalds would sponsor those) The final quote just made me laugh, though:

“We’ve all been on wild goose chases looking for cash machines. A new road sign could save endless hours searching the streets.”

No, I’ve never been on a wild goose chase looking for a cash machine. If all else fails, go to the nearest supermarket. Simple.

Grrr.


Extended Sentence

Well, it’s been determined, my sentence here has been extended again – I’m now here ’til the end of August.

At that point, I’ll have been in this one contract for 11 months.

Time flies when you’re having fun.


At long last

Seven weeks today, and Blair finally quits..

Frankly, the time just can’t go quickly enough.

However, I assume that the media needs that much time to figure out what to whittle on about incessantly, now that all the speculation about ‘when the lying little weasel-shagger will finally fuck off'(© Me.) is over and done with.