Goals
Posted: Tue 17 February, 2009 Filed under: D4D™, Depression, Five Year Plan (now Ten), Own Business, The '09 Writing Project, Thoughts, Writing Leave a comment »Yesterday, in a comment on the post about colour-schemes for D4D™, Gordon wrote :
Step back a minute.
Why do you have this blog? What do YOU want from it?
Which seemed like a pretty good starting point for a post, to be honest.
1. Why do you have this blog?
There’s a number of reasons, but the main one will always come out as “Because I wanted to see if I could“. Over the years, I’ve had many many projects that I’ve started up, got about 75-80% of the way through, or even all the way to launch, and then got bored and not completed them. (or not continued putting energy into them) There was always something new to try, something else to work on.
D4D™ was a way to combat that. It was an ongoing project, sure – but it’s been one I’ve kept on with now for six-and-a-bit years. Maybe it’ll fade out at some point – the odds are that it will – but it’s kept going, kept me going, and I haven’t just faded off with it. Sure, it’s nowhere even close to what I envisioned when I started – them’s the breaks – but it’s kept on happening.
Also, it was a way to get me back into regular writing. Not necessarily about anything – even a quick trawl through the archives will easily show there’s no consistent theme to any of this rubbish – but to be posting at least one piece per day, every day. Years back I’d written two book-length stories as well as an absolute shed-load of shorter/smaller stuff (some of which is utterly cringeworthy now, but some of it still works to one degree or other) but they were fuelled by depression and a need for catharsis on certain experiences. Between then – about 1995 or so – and 2002 when D4D™ came on the scene, I hadn’t written a damn thing. Since then, some 750,000 words – and it must be coming up to the 800,000 mark by now – have gone through D4D™.
Of course, at some point I want to be doing more “proper” writing, as I’ve mentioned before. So at that point, D4D™ will either mutate once more, or get put on hold. Or some weird bastard-child intersection of those two things. Or something else entirely.
2. What do YOU want from it?
Now that one’s a bit harder. I don’t really know what I want from D4D™ – other than to be a braindump space, where I can splurge out some of the things and thoughts that keep on happening. It’s a healthy venting spot for my more cynical moments, but it’s bugger-all use for the more creative stuff I want to be working on.
I suppose I could add a different section to D4D™ now that a lot of the other stuff has gone The Way Of The Bin, which deals with the bigger stuff, or even get back to doing a “Page” for a longer piece every so often. (That’s what I would do with the old rants etc. anyway, should they ever make a comeback) Or I could just have a different site for that writing stuff. I don’t know yet.
So I suppose what I want from D4D™ is to maintain a status quo, to allow me to keep on writing – with no aim of becoming BWABD (Blog With A Book Deal) or anything other than just that general dumping ground for whatever’s going on in my brain at the moment. Or at least whatever’s going on in my brain that is a) not related to other sites/writing and b) not related to the multitudinous other business ideas etc that are forever battering round the brain cells.
In fact, I think that’s what the aim will be for now – to let the site keep on going, to keep it doing the same kind of things it has for the last six years.
Of course, that means that I’ve got an open hand when it comes to colour schemes etc. – but for now that’s going to stay the same too, and the yellow will remain as a reminder of the reasons why D4D™ came into being at all…
Getting Longer
Posted: Sun 21 December, 2008 Filed under: Depression, Domestic Leave a comment »Now we’re past the Winter Solstice, at least the days will be getting longer. It might not feel like it, but it’s happening – slowly but surely.
Getting Darker
Posted: Fri 12 December, 2008 Filed under: Depression, Domestic, Thoughts 1 Comment »Within the next two weeks, we’ll get past not only the Festering Season, but also the Winter Solstice. And that means that the days will then start getting longer again – which is always a good thing.
In fairness, the Solstice always means more to me than the Festering Season anyway. (I know, that’s no shock to anyone here)
Interestingly though, so far this year I don’t appear to have been overly prone to the Seasonal Depressions, which again is A Good Thing®. I’m normally very susceptible to the old Seasonal Depressions – again, as regular readers well know – but for whatever reason, this year they don’t appear to have kicked in all that much.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still prone to very bad days (and sometimes weeks) but I’m nowhere near the prolonged State Of Glum that was the usual. This last week has, for me, been a particularly hard one – but that’s more down to my dislike of people than down to the weather/light/colour of sky.
I don’t know if I’ll fall foul of the Seasonals this year now (for this post could almost be seen as tempting fate) but we’ll see.
Regardless, I’ll be happier come the 23rd to know that the nights will be getting shorter again, and then come Jan 2nd when all this Festering Shit will be properly over with for another year. Once all that’s done, things should improve anyway.
Remember, Remember
Posted: Wed 5 November, 2008 Filed under: Cynicism, Depression, Domestic 6 Comments »Shit, I’m thirty-fucking-seven.
Blimey.
Cutting Out Diet Coke
Posted: Wed 11 June, 2008 Filed under: Depression, Health 3 Comments »I promise, I’m not going to turn into some kind of anti-Diet-Coke evangelist now that I’ve cut it out myself. Honest.
However, I did notice today via Bitful a couple of interesting articles…
- A short piece from the Guardian of a committed dietcokeaholic (hmm, can’t identify with that at all) who cut out fizzy drinks for a month – he felt so good from that, he hasn’t gone back to them yet
- Coca-Cola is phasing out a controversial additive that has been linked to damage to DNA and hyperactivity in children. (It’s a link to the Daily Mail <spit> I’m afraid, but there we go – they’re who had the story
- A story in the Ecologist : “Far from being the healthy drink implied by its sports sponsorships, Diet Coke is a worrying cocktail of neurotoxic and potentially carcinogenic chemicals”
So there we go, more grist for the mill of stopping (and not going back to) drinking Diet Coke®.
Predictions
Posted: Sat 5 January, 2008 Filed under: Cynicism, Depression 3 Comments »On a highly cynical note, now that she’s lost custody of her sons as well how long do you reckon it’ll be before Britney Spears
- Has a(nother) breakdown?
- Attempts suicide?
- Announces her ‘retirement’?