Posted: Tue 8 June, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: Domestic, Health, Thoughts, Travel, Work-related |
On Sunday, I put my back out. Not completely certain of how, but I’m pretty certain it involved a load of garden furniture in the car, then losing my temper while getting it all back out of the car at home.
Then stupidly (in hindsight) I sat down on the floor to assemble the new table – yep, I braved the joys of self-assembly garden furniture, and achieved it with no swearing and no pain. Well, not ’til I stood up again having done the job – or at least I tried to stand up.
At that point my lower back hurt enough that I nearly passed out – full-on black and white vision, the lot. Really not funny. Luckily I’d already unpacked all the new garden chairs, so I was able to road-test one of those while waiting for everything to get back to normal.
My pain threshold is pretty high. Not awesomely high, or “stick needles in me and I won’t notice” high, but high enough that I’ve been able to do stupid things like walk on a totally stuffed ankle, get annoyed with a nagging toenail and pull the entire thing out, or have various dental bits done without painkillers. And yet the pain in my back was enough – and I suppose surprising enough and sudden enough – that it made it almost unbearable at the start.
It’s got better since – looks more like a twisted muscle than a stuffed disc, for example – and while I was fragile yesterday, I was still able to go in to work and do most of the normal stuff. The only two things I actually wimped out on were a) walking Hound and b) getting the rest of the growbags out of the boot of the car. Walking would’ve been painful, lifting bags of compost again would’ve been truly, epically, weapons-grade stupid.
Today’s a bit better again, thankfully. But it’s made me rather more aware of my back for a while, and I’ll try not to re-stuff it. Frankly, it fucking hurts.
Posted: Mon 24 May, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: Health, News, People, Thoughts |
Today the GMC has struck off Dr Andrew Wakefield, the doctor whose ‘research’ caused so much of the tension and bad press for the MMR (Measles, Mumps and Rubella) innoculation jabs, and a purported link to induce autism-related conditions.
The GMC also said Dr Wakefield, who was working at London’s Royal Free Hospital as a gastroenterologist at the time, did not have the ethical approval or relevant qualifications for such tests.
And the panel hearing the case took exception with the way he gathered blood samples. Dr Wakefield paid children £5 for the samples at his son’s birthday party.
It also said Dr Wakefield should have disclosed the fact that he had been paid to advise solicitors acting for parents who believed their children had been harmed by the MMR.
Quite amazing, how this doctor’s research was both so universally accepted as Truth, and was so flawed from the start. That research has caused so many knock-on effects with the increasing incidence of both Measles and Rubella in children whose parents decided not to innoculate them because of the supposed issues.
Posted: Mon 19 April, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: Domestic, Geeky, Health, Weight Loss |
via Twitter, I came across Withings scales – a set of scales that’s connected to t’Internet. (via wireless network)
I still can’t decide whether it’s a great idea or an incredibly bad one. I love the concept of being able to keep track of your weight, graph it out and monitor it. I hate the idea of it connecting to t’Internet rather than just recording the data on a card for uploading to your own computer. I get the idea of it, but yeah, that connection to t’Internet means I probably wouldn’t want one.
Interesting idea, though.
Posted: Thu 15 April, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: 2009/10, Depression, Domestic, Five Year Plan (now Ten), Health, Introspective, Thoughts, Writing |
A couple of weeks back I wrote about making an appointment to see the doctor about depression, lack of motivation, lack of drive etc. etc. I didn’t – and still don’t – want to ask for help, but I know that in my current state I have/had to.
Yesterday was the day of the appointment. 7am and I’m at the doctors. That’s never going to be the start of a good day…
Anyway, I talked through some of the stuff with the GP – who’s extremely wet and wanky, but means well. Better than being completely useless I suppose. But you never really get the impression he could give much of a damn one way or t’other. I suppose that’s one of the risks of being a GP though.
And now I’ve got a prescription for Citalopram, an SSRI anti-depressant. I’m going to take them, and see how things go.
I’m not happy about being on these pills, but I’m at the point where I know that I need something to break the cycle/spiral I’ve got into. This is the first step in that process. Well technically it’s the third step, I suppose- the first one was acknowledging I’m in that cycle at all, and the second was doing something about it by going to the GP.
I don’t like the thought of being reliant on pills or medication – I’m crap at even taking painkillers unless I really need them.
Also I can’t help but wonder what I’ll be like on anti-depressants. I’ve been living with depression for such a long time now, I wonder what changes there’ll be if it’s not around. It’ll be interesting to find out, anyway.
Posted: Fri 2 April, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: Creativity, Depression, Domestic, Health, Own Business, Photography, Thoughts, Work-related, Writing |
It won’t give up, it wants me dead
Goddamn this noise inside my head
© Nine Inch Nails, “The Becoming”, Downward Spiral album
That’s not quite where I am at the moment – but somehow it still seems to be the best lyric for describing things at the moment.
I’ve written before about my regular issues and history with depression, and the way I normally fight my way through it. Recently though, that’s not been the case. If I’m honest, the last three or four years have involved fighting, but only getting to an impasse, a holding action to keep ground, rather than a victory.
I’ve made lots of plans, and had the intention to do things. It’s just that I never seem to find the time or the final motivation to get them done. I keep on trying, and I keep on failing – and at the moment there’s no good reason for Why. I just don’t get to it. That final bit, that final push, is missing, AWOL.
So I’m working on getting through it, but I’m also going to go a different route this time. I’ve a doctor’s appointment in a couple of weeks time, and I’m going to aim to get some anti-depressants. Not something I’m overly happy about, but I think it’s time for me to try them again.
I had a very negative experience with them many moons ago, so I have some really serious reservations about them. But if I can give them a go and they work, so be it. If not, it’s another avenue tried and I need to find other options. But at least I’ll be trying the avenues this time.
Posted: Mon 15 March, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: Domestic, Health |
Yet again, my foot is sore, to the point of making me limp when I walk. (Ooer, matron, Fnarr Fnarr, etc etc.)
I don’t know what the hell I do to it – I woke up yesterday morning with it being a bit sore, and it’s progressed from there.
Most annoying. It’ll sort itself out over the next couple of days, but in the meantime it’s a pain in the bits.
Posted: Sat 6 February, 2010 | Author: Lyle | Filed under: Domestic, Driving, Health, Own Business, Travel, Work-related |
One of our plans this weekend was to go over to the NEC and visit the International Spring Fair, a massive trade fair held every year.
However, somehow I’ve managed to stuff my foot (again) which means that walking is currently pretty painful. No idea quite what I’ve done to the damn thing, but it’s becoming a more regular occurrence round these parts, which isn’t a good sign. Thing is, it’s not damage in the same location as before, so it’s not like one weak spot or anything.
We could still go, but I think it’d be pretty silly to do a two-hour-plus drive each way and walk/limp round the NEC while on a dodgy foot.
For the rest, I can hold off ’til the Autumn version, so it’s not a massive loss- just a delay to a couple of things.
All told it’s a bit of a bummer, but for once I’m trying to let common-sense take over from ‘Well we’ve planned it so that’s what we’re going to do.”