Second Thoughts

As I wrote a while back, I’ve signed up to the NSPCC’s “Climb the Gherkin” challenge in about eight weeks’ time. It involves walking (or, if you’re a lunatic, running) up the 38 flights of stairs inside the Gherkin in London to get to the top.

It’s fair to say, I’m having some doubts and second thoughts about the wisdom of it. It’s a lot of steps…

I’ve looked it up – because I’m an idiot – and now know that it’s over 1,000 steps to the top, and that’s making it all a bit real. There’s a lot of me to lift up that many steps, and really not many places where you can get to train or prepare for something like that.

I’ll still go, and I’m sure I’ll complete the challenge. It’s just that it might destroy me along the way…


Following the Crowd – Again

Following on from yesterday’s post about charity, Children in Need, and doing what everyone else does, another current grouse is around Movember. It’s a great cause – raising awareness of male cancers, and raising funds for fighting them – but it’s another group thing.

In my office, every other male member of staff is doing it. And when you ask their motivations? Yep, it’s either “Well, everyone else is doing it, so I thought I would”, or “it’s for charity”. Yet when I asked them what charity it was for, at least half had no bloody clue, and aren’t even doing it to raise money.

Movember started off as a fun idea – but this year it’s got huge sponsors (including Gilette – which is kind of obvious, in fairness – and Three) but I just kind of get twitchy when it comes to charitable stuff with large corporate sponsors.

So yeah, if you’re going to do something that’s based around charity – at least support that charity, or know what the frick you’re talking about, rather than just following the damn crowd.


Following the Crowd

For many, many reasons – none of which I can really be chuffed with going into right now – I’ve grown up to be horrifically independent, both in action, life, and thought. One facet of that is that I’m sensationally bad at group activities, at doing what ‘most people’ do.

Today’s a case in point. I know I’ve waffed on about it before, but it’s Children in Need day, which is one of my particular bugbears.

“But it’s for charity, isn’t it?” is the calling-card of the day, assuming that if you’re not taking part and dressing up (or whatever) then you’re A Bad Person, and Uncharitable to boot. “Why not dress up, everyone else is doing it”.

And that’s part of my problem with the entire thing – it’s that ‘everyone else’ is doing it. Like Groucho Marx said, I’m not interested in being part of any club that’ll have me as a member. In the same way, if everyone else is doing something, you can be pretty damn sure that I won’t be.

The other side, when it comes to these days of charity and fundraising, is that I don’t like being conspicuous about which charities I support – and I like even less being forced (or attempts to force) to support charities because of how their perceived. I don’t publicise what I do, or who with, or why – because it’s no-one’s fucking business but my own. Being pushed to take part in something popular, into some fund-raising activity or other because everyone else is doing it, that can fuck right off.

So today, I’ll be in my corner, “Bah Humbug” hat and all. If you don’t like it, sod off. Go on, everyone else is doing it.


Blessed Relief

So, today is Comic Relief day (AKA Red Nose Day) – one of those shit fund-raising days that encourage people to be “crazy” and “funny” by getting dressed up and acting like tossbags. “It’s all for charidee, innit?” Fuck off.

For the record, I don’t mind Comic Relief – the charity, not the activity.  They do good stuff, both in the UK and everywhere else, and I think that’s good.  I just can’t stand the way people go stupid about it. (Let’s be honest, I’m not a fan of people most of the time anyway)  It’s always the “I’m mad, me” bell-ends that love it, along with (sometimes) some of the quieter office people who normally don’t say a word, but do something special “for charity” (or out of peer-pressure, I don’t know) At least the quiet ones are amusing to watch, because they’re so mortified and teeth-grindingly awkward about the entire thing.

My main amusement this year has come from the changes at Radio 1. (Yes, I still listen to it, despite the increasing ass-hattery of the presenters)  In previous years, Chris Moyles has raised millions of pounds on his show for Comic Relief. Just in 2011, his “longest radio show” raised £2.4million on its own, and there was other stuff that year as well.  When he left last year, Comic Relief came in and revealed that Moyles’ show had raised just under £11 million.

This year, the new Breakfast Show presenter did a show yesterday for Comic Relief, and raised … £250,000.

Of course that’s still a decent amount, don’t get me wrong. But he’s all impressed with himself for getting that figure, and I’m thinking “Moyles managed that in about an hour”

So, that’s been amusing.

In the meantime, though, tonight I’ll be avoiding the TV (and any thought of shopping etc. can sod right off) and doing absolutely nothing Comic Relief related. This is A Good Thing.


Oh Good God

Once more, it’s Children in Need day.

This means I’ll be avoiding people like the plague all day. Yes, even more than usual.