Night Driving

Posted: Tue 21 September, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Driving, People, Thoughts | 2 Comments »

There’s a story on the BBC today about whether it would be better for new drivers to not be allowed to drive at night for a defined period once they’ve first passed their tests.

In some ways I do think this is a good idea – I’ve said before that I like the Australian method, with limitations on night driving, no alcohol level allowed at all, and a limitation on number of similar-aged people in the same car.

However, as the story says, it would also be a nightmare to administrate and enforce.

So perhaps a better idea would be to simply insist that the learner undergoes a certain number of lessons at night, and thus gets used to night-driving in as controlled a way as possible?

WTF

Posted: Fri 17 September, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: 1BEM, Charm School, Cynicism, News, People, Stupidity, Sweary | Leave a comment »

Every so often a story in the news just makes me say “What. The. Fuck?” – this one is one of those stories.

Children at a school near Selby have had a play break cancelled and hard ball games banned after neighbours complained to the council about noise.

Barlby Community Primary School has also put up a soundproof fence because it fears a noise abatement order.

So people who live near a school – and one assumes, have either a) lived there for a while, or b) moved in thinking it would be nice and quiet (because they’re shit-for-brains morons) – complain that the school is noisy at play time.

You really have to wonder sometimes. In the town where I grew up, a housing estate was built that backed on to the local sewage farm. People who moved into those houses complained about the smell, and tried to get the (pre-existing) sewage farm shut down.  When I was in Manchester people who moved in to one part of the city centre complained about the noise from the bars, and tried to get them shut down.

If you’re that fucking stupid that you move near a school, or a bar, or a sewage farm, and only then complain that there’s a problem, then you don’t deserve to be allowed to complain. Live with it, and shut the fuck up. You moron.

Weighty

Posted: Wed 25 August, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Business, Domestic, Health, People, Thoughts, Weight Loss, Work-related | Leave a comment »

This week at work, I’ve broken the chair I’ve been using since October. Completely, categorically broken it. The central piston (for raising/lowering the seat) has cracked through the plastic baseplate, and now hits the floor. This has resulted in a chair that is politely known as “broken”. Or in my terminology, it’s “totally fucked”.

Thankfully the directors are OK about it – it’s wear and tear (and me being a weighty bastard) rather than that I’ve wilfully abused/broken the chair.

But because I know that at least some of the blame is due to being rather bulkier than most people, I had a look at the specs for some new office chairs as a replacement. And I know Argos isn’t exactly the centre of the office-furniture world, but it’s a useful reference point.

So looking through the chairs they’ve got listed, and all of them seem to have a ‘recommended max weight’ of 110kg – 17ish stone. You can see what I mean by looking at this one. And don’t just think it’s the cheap-ass ones – even this one for £150 has the same limitaton.

I know I’m not an average size – I’d need to lose four stone just to get down to that ‘max recommended weight’ – but equally I’m not massively obese. Fairly solid, I think it’s fair to say, but not supersized or owt. So why is it that chairs just aren’t available (in Argos, I know, I know) that are designed to support – or at least not fuck up and break – for someone my size?

Shit for Brains

Posted: Fri 20 August, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Cynicism, News, Offensive Repetition, People, Sweary, Thoughts | 1 Comment »

I love the story on the BBC this week about a council who’ve used the word “shit”  in their adverts about dog-fouling. (even though it’s starred out to “S**T”) Supposedly a number of people have complained about the word “S**T” appearing in print. Which strikes me as pretty Mary Whitehouse at the best of times.

Way back when I was working with the council in Oldham, this was something that we discussed heavily. One of my projects there was working on a lexicon of expressions that people actually used, and then translating them into council-ese. For example “roadworks” becomes “Highways maintenance”, “bins” becomes “refuse collection” and the like. I always said – and could prove with the search logs (pardon the pun) – that “dog shit” was the most common search-term when people were looking for information about dog-fouling, reporting issues with dog-shit etc. But the powers-that-be in the council at the time were very sure – despite all the evidence to the contrary – that having “shit” in the lexicon was A Bad Thing, and would lead to Bad Press – another Very Bad Thing.  Considering that most people at the time used the word “Shit” as pretty much synonymous with that council in general anyway, I always figured they were on a hiding to nothing on that one.

Personally I could never figure out why people thought – and obviously still do think – that councils can’t use words like shit, when they’re the ones that most (if not all) of their constituents/inhabitants use.

*sigh* People are strange.

Suited/Booted ?

Posted: Tue 17 August, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Geeky, People, Thoughts, Work-related | 4 Comments »

Over the next few days at work, we again have potential investors visiting the office, and so the word has gone round to be as smart as possible.

While I don’t have any real problem with this, and generally look vaguely presentable, my main argument is that these visitors – Americans – aren’t expecting the techies to be suited and booted.

I wasn’t hired for this role because of how I look in a suit, or because I’ll be dealing with customers. I was (to blow my own trumpet briefly) hired for my brains and my skills in writing websites, databases and the like. Suited and booted is – for the most part, and unless I’m in an interview – irrelevant to my skill-set or reason for being employed.

Personally, I wouldn’t ever trust a techie in a suit. Sure, they/we can wear suits for other stuff – interviews, smart events, weddings, social stuff etc. – but in the office? A techie in a suit isn’t a techie.

What do you think? Would you trust a techie in a suit?

Road Maintenance and Sarcasm

Posted: Mon 16 August, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: 1BEM, Charm School, Cynicism, Domestic, Driving, Norfolk, People, Stupidity, Travel | Leave a comment »

Over the weekend, one of the significant crossroads near us was completely closed for re-surfacing. The problem was that at least one route to get to that crossroads didn’t have any mention of said road closure.

Which means I get to send sarcastic emails to Norfolk County Council. (Again)

To whom it may concern,

I’d just like to congratulate the person(s) involved in sorting out signage for the road closure in Hingham this weekend.

If (as many people did) you took the road from Little Ellingham towards Hingham using Hingham Road->Little Ellingham Road -> Attleborough Road to the crossroads in Hingham, there was not *ONE* sign saying that the road ahead was closed. The signage was in fact before this junction (at roughly the spot of the red circle in this map)

This meant that anyone coming through on the route from Little Ellingham came round the corner to find the entire road closed off, and then had to turn round and go back. This also had the effect of stuffing a significant amount of the newly resurfaced road before the junction.

Of course, the road from Little Ellingham isn’t that heavily used. Except when Little Ellingham has its Vintage Working Weekend event- yes, the weekend just passed.

I look forward to any response Norfolk Council deigns to give in explanation of why there was no thought given to this route, or signage on it.

Sincerely

Lyle

I know it’ll do bugger-all good, but I felt better having written it. And that’s what matters.

Rural Weekend

Posted: Sat 14 August, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Norfolk, People, Weirdness | Leave a comment »

This weekend the village down the road has their annual “vintage working weekend” event. It’s a bizarre thing – not quite a steam rally, not quite anything particular – but means that our road is pretty much constantly thronged by tractors running up and down.

Right now though there’s a parade of tractors going past the front of the house, some with passengers on trailers, most just being driven along as part of the parade. Completely mad.

So far there’s been about forty of the damn things…

← Older Entries
Newer Entries →