Improving sarcasm for thirty years

A Very Good Deal

Over the weekend, my toaster finally died. (You can tell this one’s going to be interesting, can’t you?) It’s done fairly well, daily service for three years, if not more. Over Easter it had started playing up, but then on Saturday it gave up completely.

So – off to the retail superstore of gloom. (It’s closest, I couldn’t be arsed with faffing about too much, and I had some vouchers to use up)

I had a look, and decided on this one, mainly because it’s purple – I’m shallow like that – and because it was £10 off the marked price, so £40 instead of £50. Fair enough.

But when I got to the tills, it scanned at … hang on … £19?  OK, I’ll check it with the customer services, but that’ll do.

As it was, I also had a number of vouchers (all in “You would’ve saved £x at a different store, so here’s the difference” price-match vouchers) that came to £25. So I effectively ended up with Tesco paying me £6 for my new toaster…

I don’t know quite how it all worked out like that, but I’m not going to complain.

[Additional] : When I went to customer services to check, in case a) the price was wrong or b) their system was wrong, I waited ages to be seen and then the person involved said “Oh, for electrical enquiries you’ve got to go back upstairs and ask them“. To which my thought response was “Fuck that, if you can’t be arsed to check it, I can’t be arsed to report it any further“.

So – a nice new toaster for  the princely sum of minus six pounds.  I can live with that.

Creatively Becalmed

This year so far – and probably for a bit longer than that, if I’m honest – I’ve not been getting all that much done on a creative front, and I don’t really know why.  It’s more a feeling of being bogged down, uninspired, and just not in the mood.

Writing is going better than anything else – lots of ideas, but nothing is particularly gelling at the moment. I’ve got a couple of things started, but it’s still bogging down, and not flowing.

Photography-wise, I haven’t even taken my camera out in ages. Really it’s been since I did the NCFE course, which is a bloody long time now. I don’t know why that seemed to flick the ‘can’t be arsed’ switch, but it has.  I’ve tried a few things and ideas, but it’s just all a bit “meh”, with no real desire to take the photos.

In some ways, the day-trips over the last few months have helped on that – I’ve taken photos, even if ‘only’ with the phone (although that’s a surprise, considering how good they’ve come out) but still can’t really bring myself to take the actual camera out for a day. A lot of that is also because I can’t be arsed with lugging it around and faffing about, but mainly it’s just the faff of it all at the moment.

I’m sure things will change again – I certainly hope so – and that the changes will be positive for once. The rest of this year to date has been positive, so I’m hoping that once I have some headspace and time, I’ll be more prompted.

(And I’m sure I’ve written about this a couple of times this year already, so forgive the repetition. It’s just something that’s bugging me at the moment)

Make Up Your Damn Mind 2

It seems like a developing theme (although I don’t intend it to be so) but I’ve been noticing dodgy signage/labelling this week.

This one is at a local restaurant…

So - not all day every day then

So – not all day every day then

If you’re advertising a menu as “All day every day”, you can’t then qualify it as “up to 6pm on Friday and Saturday”, can you?


Make Up Your Damn Mind

While shopping this morning, I looked at “Glaceau Vitamin Water“. Not for any intention of buying, just out of interest (I got a promo thingy for it, so thought I’d look).

The labelling is….. interesting.

Zero or not?

Zero or not?

So… “Zero Calories”, but 100ml contains 1.5 calories, and 500ml contains 8calories.

All told, that makes it a pretty interesting interpretation of “zero”…

Burger Crawl

Over the weekend, I took part in a very silly event that I’d discussed and come up with – a Burger Crawl in London.

It started off with a conversation about alternatives to pub crawls – I can’t even remember why it came up – but it seemed like a fun idea.

Originally it was going to be four of us as a trial run, but two dropped out, so it ended up just being one friend and me doing it, but that was fine.

Because it was the first one, and my idea, it ended up being my plan for where to go. So I made the choice that it was going to be all new places, nowhere we’d been before, and all in a similar area of London, rather than roaming all over the place.

As it turned out, it almost started badly. The place I’d picked for the first one – breakfast at Honest Burger‘s place near Liverpool Street – wasn’t open, they only do breakfasts Monday to Friday.  So, a bit of a trip on the first hurdle, but we had other places on the list of possibles, and went for one of those instead.

So the final list was

We did well – much more food and it would’ve involved exploding stomachs – and was a brilliant day with all the new venues being excellent. I plan to return to all of them – just maybe not all in one day again.

Oh – and we covered a fair amount of distance as well, which probably helped in dealing with the amount of food…

Distance Covered

There will be more BurgerCrawls in the future – and we’ve had a couple of other related ideas too – but for a first go, it all went really well, and definitely a success.

Resurgence Of Ills

Late last week, and into this, the lung-crap made a bit of a revisit.

It’s nowhere near as bad as the full-on Bronchitis of a couple of months back, but it’s been noticeable, with the cough and the lumps of coughed-up green. Over the weekend I did wonder if I was going to have to make a return visit to my GP – not that I wanted to – because of the breathing issues and crackles in the lungs again, but for now that seems to have receded again.

I’m actually feeling OK, and pretty healthy – which makes it even more annoying that this crap keeps on coming back round.

It’s back on the wane now, thankfully. I just hope I don’t get battered by a third round of it.

Overtaking – On the decline

Over the last few weeks of driving, I’ve been noticing more and more that other drivers seem to be quite averse to overtaking, even with miles of clear and visible road ahead.  I don’t quite know why it is – maybe it’s about how generally risk-averse we’re becoming – but it’s bloody annoying.

I do overtake – so long as it’s safe, and the road is clear. (That should go without saying, but still) But I now seem to be in the minority.

Of course, the irony is that when you’re then on a multi-carriageway road, every single one of those motherfuckers is sitting in the outside two lanes, overtaking fuck-all. But I digress.

The thing is, if you’re behind five or six – hell, even two or three – vehicles who aren’t overtaking whatever’s holding everyone up/back, then my own overtaking manoeuvre becomes difficult, if not impossible. So you just end up sitting there, because no-one else is prepared to do anything.

It’s an odd state of affairs – and sometimes bloody annoying. But there’s not a lot that you can do, except accept that it’s just going to be one of those days…

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