Weirdly Consistent
Posted: Fri 14 December, 2018 Filed under: Cinema, Customer Services, Domestic, Films, Geeky, Single Life, Thoughts, Weirdness Leave a comment »When I moved here six-and-a-half years ago (and yes, that does still freak me out) I got a Cineworld Unlimited card, so I could see as many films as I wanted to. It’s a decent deal, less than £20 a month, so as long as you see more than one film per month, it’s paid for itself.
Because I’m a geek, I also started listing what I’d seen, with a separate sheet per year.
And it seems like I’m really quite consistent in how many films I see each year – not through any plan or schedule, it’s just the way it’s worked out.
The totals are
- 2012 – 26 films (although that’s in under six months, as I didn’t get the card ’til July/August)
- 2013 – 61 films
- 2014 – 64 films
- 2015 – 64 films
- 2016 – 54 films
- 2017 – 66 films
And so far this year I’m on… 62, with a couple of weeks to go.
Each year I think I’ll up my quality control a bit and see fewer films (when you’re not paying anything to see them, it’s remarkably easy to just say “Yeah, fuck it, I’ll give that a go”) And yet it all ends up being much of a muchness.
It’s odd, but I’m not going to complain. At least I know I’m getting value for money out of my Unlimited card. (It’s an outlay per year of £215 all told – so each film is costing me an average of £3.30, which is one fuck of a lot cheaper than the £10-ish for a single ticket!)
Downtime(ish)
Posted: Mon 27 November, 2017 Filed under: Depression, Domestic, Films, SAD, Thoughts Leave a comment »The weekend just gone ended up being a proper weekend “off”, and much needed. The last few weeks (well, months) have been pretty hectic, what with one thing and another. This weekend had been kind-of empty, but that also meant I’d booked stuff in.
I should’ve taken the hint though – a couple of weeks ago I cancelled off my first plan (a restaurant visit) because I just wasn’t feeling it, wasn’t looking forward to it, and where’s the fun in it when every single reaction to it is “blah”? So I sacked that off, and had made other plans, which then fell through a bit. No-one’s fault, just short-notice and other things already booked with the people in question. So I’d made a third plan, a day-trip to Manchester (travelling by train, so it was still semi-sensible, by my standards) which would’ve been fun – I haven’t been back to Manchester in a good eighteen months or so.
And then on Wednesday/Thursday I got an email making me aware that Manchester was going to be full of football stuff, plus a few other events, and I realised that actually I didn’t want that – and I particularly didn’t want that super-packed train home. Not in the mood for the people and the crowds, blah blah.
So I sacked it all off, admitted defeat (not quite the right word, but it’ll do for now) and stayed home. I still did a fair amount – sorted a bundle of domestic stuff, got rid of some things to the local tip, went to the cinema to watch a rubbish and easy-watching film on the Saturday, and then went out with local friends on the Sunday evening.
Basically, it was all enough to appease my brain’s nagging work ethic, but without doing much more than the bare minimum to appease it.
It was good – but also annoying, because I don’t actually feel any better for that quiet weekend. Maybe it’s a lost hope now, but I wanted to sleep, and to feel somewhat refreshed by the end of a peaceable and quiet weekend – but I don’t. I’m still tired, still feeling a bit blah about things, and just trying to figure shit out.
It was needed, but I kind-of wish it felt like I’d had more benefit out of it…
Detroit
Posted: Wed 9 August, 2017 Filed under: Domestic, Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »In a weirdly – and unintentionally – connected thing to seeing the Soul Of A Nation exhibition over the weekend, I also ended up seeing “Detroit” last night.
“Detroit” is a new film from Katheryn Bigelow (the director of the original Point Break, Hurt Locker, Zero Dark Thirty, and many others) about the Detroit (unsurprisingly) 12th Street race riot, and in particular the Algiers Motel incident.
That incident is (yet another) one I didn’t really know anything about until seeing the film. I don’t believe it’s one that has gone into ‘common knowledge’ – while I’m no expert on these things, it’s not one I’ve ever heard even mentioned, and I don’t honestly think it’s even left a large imprint on American history.
Anyway, the film is an interesting one – but (in my opinion) tries too hard, telling too many stories in one film. There could have been a film about the riots themselves, the causes, the people, the effects. There could have been a film about just the Algiers incident – although I suspect that the conclusion of that would’ve been deeply unsatisfactory. And there could’ve been one about the aftermath, the court case(s), the people, and what happened to them afterwards.
But trying to do all of those within the scope of one film – admittedly, a bloody long film at 14o-odd minutes – is difficult, at best. It starts with the riots, and we don’t even really meet any of the “main” characters for a good half an hour. Then we go to the Algiers, which is as bad as it could be – and probably pretty truthful, as one of the people involved was on set every day, advising and providing input. And then for the final half hour or so, we’re in the court case, the details, the results, and the aftermath.
If the film had been longer, it might’ve gelled better, become a whole story. As it is, it feels overly-edited, almost like a ‘greatest hits’ rather than a full story. It’s still a good film, and a story that should be told. It’s just that the story deserves to be properly told, not in a hodge-podge of setpieces.
King Arthur, Legend of the Sword
Posted: Fri 19 May, 2017 Filed under: Domestic, Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Single Life Leave a comment »Last night, I went to see the new Guy Ritchie film, “King Arthur – Legend of the Sword“. It is, to be charitable, a bit of a mess.
I wasn’t expecting high-art, or a high-brow version of the Arthurian Legends – it’s a Guy Ritchie film, so anyone expecting that would be sorely disappointed anyway. But I was expecting a Guy Ritchie film – a significant portion of silliness, snappy and smart dialogue, and some impressive visuals/shots. This is the man who brought us “Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels”, “Snatch”, “Sherlock Holmes” (and its sequel) and “The Man From Uncle” – all of which qualify on all those things, and all of which I like.
But this one… well.
It’s got silliness – but in this case it veers more towards the ridiculous. Yes, ridiculous even within the pantheon of Arthurian stuff. The mage-driven war-elephants larger than mountains were a particular “high” point in this. But at least they were visually impressive. Which leads me to…
Visuals – it’s got some gloriously shot scenes and set-pieces. But the rest is a mess. Even some of those setpieces, there’s just too much going on for it to make sense. It needs to convey the speed and fury and chaos of battle – and in some ways I guess it does that, as no-one has any fucking clue what’s going on. But it’s also a film, and you should be able to at least see what’s happening. There are bits that are visually brilliant, but then the rest just detracts from those pieces.
Dialogue – it’s got it. But again, like the silliness, it feels forced, and it doesn’t fit with the characters, or the time. There are a couple of larger pieces that are definitely meant to be “Lock, Stock and Broadsword”, but they simply don’t work, even with snappy camerawork to accompany them.
Some of it may also be down to the cast – I like Charlie Hunnam in most things, but he does come across as being more of a supporter than a star. So having him as the main character doesn’t necessarily help things – but it does seem far more like the script is a complete dog-egg, and they’ve all just done what they can with it. And if that’s the case, then it’s really Guy Ritchie who’s primarily responsible, as he’s the writer of the original screenplay too.
All told, the nicest I can say is that it’s a mess. Not one I’d go and see again, it’s fair to say.
Logan
Posted: Mon 6 March, 2017 Filed under: Cinema, Domestic, Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »As expected (and hoped-for), Logan turned out to be bloody good – and succeeded in all the aims that the writers and director had gone for.
It’s a superhero/comic-book film that doesn’t work to the normal stereotypes. Most importantly, it’s one where you don’t need to have seen any of the other X-Men or Wolverine films before seeing Logan. It’s more a stand-alone film that just happens to occupy the same space as some of those movies.
In many ways it’s actually more of a Western than a superhero film, and that’s no bad thing in my book. They make a lot of connections with Shane, but it could just as easily have been Unforgiven. There’s a kind of bitterness to the whole film, both an anger at getting old, and an acknowledgement that it’s happened – and also a huge sadness about it.
In the case of both of the major characters, age is hitting the things they’re most valued by – Charles Xavier, always valued for his intelligence/genius, is suffering from dementia (among other things), and Logan’s regenerative ability is fading, leaving him sore, scarred, and hurting in ways he’s never had to get used to.
The next generation is ably served by Laura (AKA X-23), played by Dafne Keen, who is frankly awesome. She doesn’t speak for the greater part of the film, but the emotion and feeling she conveys in a glare and an eyebrow is nothing short of stunning.
Obviously, if you hate superhero and comic-book films, Logan won’t change your opinion. If you’re open to them, it’s one that is well worth seeing.
X-23
Posted: Tue 28 February, 2017 Filed under: Domestic, Films, Geeky, Seeing Films Leave a comment »Tonight, I’m off out seeing a preview of the new X-men film, “Logan“, which is apparently the last of the X-Men films to have Hugh Jackman as Wolverine.
It’ll be interesting, as pretty much all the films starring Wolverine have been rotten, but I’m still willing to give this one the benefit of the doubt- it’s being sold as more of an independent film, looking at how these heroes have aged, how they’ve been treated by time, and the like. So yeah, I’ll be interested to see how it works out.
On a geekier note, the preview starts at 22:23, which is amusing. Why? Because it works out as 10:23(pm) , which works out as X:23 (we’re being geeky, so one roman numeral will have to do) because the X23 programme is the programme/code for one of the successors to Wolverine
I’ll probably write more about it in the next couple of days.
Oscar-sight
Posted: Mon 27 February, 2017 Filed under: Advertising, Films Leave a comment »One of the stories of the weekend was the cockup at the Oscars on Sunday night, with La La Land initally being declared as “Best Film”, when it was actually Moonlight.
Ooooops
(Supposedly, the auditors/organisers had “mistakenly given the wrong category envelope to the presenters”)
What I loved though, was the speed that companies like Specsavers got in on the act…
Wicking Away
Posted: Wed 15 February, 2017 Filed under: Cinema, Domestic, Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »So yes, last night I went to see John Wick Chapter 2 at the cinema. If nothing else, it amused me that they were putting on the preview release of this on Valentine’s Day, as it’s just about the absolute antithesis of a romantic film.
I really liked the first John Wick film, which was a bit of a sneak hit that people hadn’t really been expecting. It’s exceptionally violent – as you’d kind of expect from the basic premise of “a retired killer comes back to avenge the death of those important to him” – but also highly stylised and stylish, with stuff shown in ways that hadn’t really been done before. It was also helped by the fact that the directors ( Chad Stahelski and David Leitch ) are both ex-stuntmen, who know what works and what looks good. They brought that experience and energy to the original, and continue to do so for the second chapter. It also made a decent amount of money ($86m from a $20m budget) so a sequel was always likely to happen.
Wick 2 is written and directed by the same primary people (although no David Leitch this time) and managed to keep all the same primary cast, while also adding in some pretty high-powered names along the way.
Happily, it is just as insane and violent as its predecessor – if you’re not into that type of film, just don’t even contemplate going. I have no idea how it got away with being a 15 certificate, but it did, so there we go.
Again, it’s also hyper-stylised, with an individual style and look, as well as building up an ample mythology that will (I suspect) take it into a third (and probably fourth) film with ease. It also looks like it’ll do better than the original – at the time of writing it’s already made $44m on a $40m budget, and that’s before the UK release. Indeed, it only came out in the US on 30th January, so it’s had two weeks there, and made its money back already. Not bad going.
So yeah, worth seeing, assuming you like the same sort of ridiculous rubbish as I appear to…
Valentinage
Posted: Tue 14 February, 2017 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Films, Milton Keynes, Seeing Films, Single Life, Valentine's Day Leave a comment »And here we are, once again, on February 14th, Valentine’s Day – one of the most pointless ‘special occasions’ known to man.
In a break with tradition, I’m being good this year. The last few years, I’ve been an absolute dickhead, but not this year.
What I have been doing is booking a table for two at a restaurant for the evening of Feb 14th, and then going on my own. It really messes with people, to be there, looking sad and abandoned on Valentine’s Day.
If I’m in a particularly cruel mood, I’ve also taken along a ring-box, putting it on the table. That really gets to people.
This year though, I’m not doing it. Instead, I’m off to see John Wick 2. Which will be mental, ridiculous, and hugely entertaining.
Attention Span
Posted: Thu 5 January, 2017 Filed under: Charm School, Cinema, Cynicism, Domestic, Films, People, Seeing Films, Technology, Thoughts, Weirdness Leave a comment »Yesterday, there was a bundle of news coverage about Apple’s supposedly-upcoming “Cinema Mode” for iPhones and iPads as part of the next iOS release.
This will (again, supposedly) allow people in cinemas – and other darkened environments, one assumes – to check their phones without disturbing those around them, mainly through use of a ‘dark’ colour-scheme, so the display doesn’t glow like a lighthouse.
In fairness, this annoys me on a regular basis at the cinema – there’s always some fuckknuckle who wants to check stuff while ‘watching’ a film, leaving their phone’s volume up, or some other piece of vacuous self-centred idiocy. But really, a phone mode to cater for that?
It irritates me that so many people now seem to be utterly incapable of sitting for a couple of hours and watching a film. There’ve been a couple of films I’ve seen recently where it seemed like everyone else was eating popcorn (or sweets, or both) from rustling paper bags throughout the film, and/or then sodding off out to the toilet and whatever else.
As has been noted before, I really don’t understand people. I don’t get why someone would pay to see a film, spend even more on food and drink, then either not be able to sit through the film without breaks, or without checking their phones. If you’re going to do all that, why not wait til it comes out on disc/download/TV and watch at home, where you can pause, rewind etc., and not worry about missing bits while you go to drain your microscopic bladder?
Mind you, I also don’t understand why cinemas insist on putting all their food/refreshments in noisy paper bags. Surely there must be another option by now? A fabric version or similar? Or larger bags/tubs that allow hands in and out without touching the sides?
Birthday Weekend – Aliens
Posted: Fri 11 November, 2016 Filed under: 2016/17, Cinema, Do More, Domestic, Films, Five Year Plan (now Ten), London, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »For the birthday weekend, once I’d done Le Manoir on Saturday, and Dinner for lunch on Sunday, it was time to make my way down to the Royal Albert Hall, which was showing Aliens on a big screen, accompanied by the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra performing the soundtrack.
Aliens is one of my favourite films, and one I’ve seen far more times than I’d care to admit – both the original release and the Director’s Cut / Special Edition. But I hadn’t seen it on a big screen for a proper cinema-style presentation, and definitely never with a live soundtrack!
And it was great. I’d wondered how they’d do soundtrack/music from the orchestra while keeping the dialogue and other sound-effects, and there’s obviously been a fair amount of work involved in doing this. I assume that the music soundtrack is on a different channel (or whatever) from the other bits of audio, so it’s more a case of ‘not playing’ one track, but I don’t know.
Regardless, hearing the music live enabled me to notice bits I hadn’t appreciated before – subtle in the recorded version, obvious live – such as the drum roll that’s used for all the more militaristic scenes, and other small thematic pieces along the way.
I thoroughly enjoyed the entire thing – well, except for the seats, which were some of the most uncomfortable in Christendom – and now really want to see other films show in the same way. It’s bloody brilliant.
Hectic (Again)
Posted: Thu 27 October, 2016 Filed under: 2015/16, Do More, Domestic, Driving, Films, Five Year Plan (now Ten), Food, Getting Organised, London, Solo Dining 4 Comments »This last week has been (yet again) pretty hectic and chaotic.
Since Saturday’s half-marathon walk, I’ve been…
- out for an Oktoberfest meal with friends on Saturday night
- into London again on Sunday for a meal in the evening at Helene Darroze (with an added 5 miles of walking)
- then cinema on Monday evening to see “The Accountant“
- into London on Tuesday evening to see “No Man’s Land” at Wyndham’s Theatre, starring Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen
- cinema on Wednesday evening to see “Dr Strange“
Today is slightly quieter, Friday I’m in Chesham, and then for the weekend I’m up in Manchester.
I must be bloody barmy.
Swiss Army Man
Posted: Thu 6 October, 2016 Filed under: Cinema, Domestic, Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »Last night, I went to see Swiss Army Man – and it’s definitely the strangest film I’ve seen in a long time. I’m glad I got to see it, though.
The first five minutes tells you pretty much everything you need to know – Hank (Paul Dano) is a man alone on a deserted island, trying to commit suicide, and a corpse (Manny, played by Daniel Radcliffe) washes up on the beach. The corpse is loudly deflating, which disturbs his final moments, until he realises that he can use this farting corpse as an escape from the island, and rides him like a jet-ski out to sea.
And that’s just the start.
It’s worth pointing out that if you’re easily offended, just don’t even contemplate seeing this film.
But it’s not just gross-out fart jokes and weird stuff with a corpse. That would be too simple. There’s a *lot* more to this film. It’s strangely emotional, and says quite a bit about modern manners and squeamishness as well as about solitude, loneliness, and how people are.
In truth, I came out wondering what the hell I’d just seen – but also glad I’d seen it. Even having seen as many films as I have, I really have no valid reference points for describing what it’s like. And that’s an even harder task when also not giving anything away about the film.
I liked it, but I didn’t. I could see it again, and I’d come out just as confused as I currently am about it. There’s a lot of good stuff, and certain images will definitely last longer than they perhaps should.
I think it’s too much to call it ‘thought-provoking’, but it’s also not dumb, and there is stuff that keeps echoing back afterwards.
In short, I just don’t know about this film. I’m hard-pressed to recommend it, because it’s just *so* odd. But it’s also not bad, and if it weren’t so odd I’d say yes, go and see it.
A very Marmite “love it or hate it” film, I think.
Filmage
Posted: Tue 13 September, 2016 Filed under: Domestic, Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Write More 2 Comments »I don’t normally bother writing about films – although maybe I should, it’d certainly provide a significant increase in posts here – but last week I saw two that I rated really highly, so there we go, some thoughts.
Hell or High Water
First of them was (as you may’ve guessed already) Hell or High Water, starring Chris Pine and Jeff Bridges. Honestly, I think it’s about the best film I’ve seen this year.
The story is basically two brothers who are robbing banks to raise money, and the old retiring Texas Ranger who’s trying to catch them. So far, so cliched. But it’s well written, the dialogue is excellent, there’s a dry humour through it, and there’s also larger motivations.
The film focuses a lot on debt, low income, Evil Banks and the like. Many of the shots show roadside ads and hoardings for loans, debt relief and so on. The pair are robbing the banks – all of which are branches of Evil Bank – for a reason, and in many ways it’s hard to see them as being “bad”.
Jeff Bridges as the soon-to-retire Texas Ranger is a crusty, grumpy joy, an old fat man who’s done his time, and sort of wants to leave, but worries about what he’ll become without his job. The way he talks to his Ranger partner has to be heard/seen to be believed – but it is believable.
All told, I loved it – I’d happily see it many more times. There’s way more layers than you expect from the basic summary, and a moral ambiguity to it that I enjoyed – the “bad” people aren’t really bad (kind of doing bad things for good reasons) and the “good” people aren’t above playing with the lines and limits either. Totally recommended.
Morgan
Morgan, on the other hand, is a very different film – except, in some ways, it’s not. Where Hell or High Water is massively masculine, all the major characters in Morgan are women (which I think is nothing but a good thing) At least two of those characters are pretty bloody terrifying in their single-mindedness.
Basically, Morgan is a genetically-engineered being, with the appearance of a late-teen/early-twenties woman. You’re never actually told what she’s been engineered for, but it becomes pretty clear. But it also raises questions – if you’re going to create something with human-level intelligence, what happens when you keep that thing locked up? Answer – the development isn’t the same as a human. (File under “Sherlock, Shit, No”)
The other primary character is Lee, sent in by “The Company” to assess the risks around Morgan after a particular incident.
Needless to say, things don’t work out well.
It is, in parts, very violent , with a couple of scenes that are gory, but in context with what’s happened. At least one is surprising and shocking. But again, it makes sense in the context of the film. It’s action, but with some thought and some big ideas hiding inside it.
Again, I loved it – although from seeing the reviews etc. afterwards, I appear to be in a minority. It hasn’t done well at cinemas, and only lasted the one week at my one. Some of that is because it just hasn’t been promoted by the cinemas and studios, some of it is that a lot of people and reviewers didn’t like it. I hope it sees a bigger audience on TV, Netflix, download, disc, whatever – because I think it should have done far, far better than the current figures are showing.
I love that it’s so women-led as a film, and I want to see more like that. It has its flaws, don’t get me wrong – I’d figured the final ‘twist’ by about the third scene, and there are holes and questions throughout. But those can be set aside (or could by me, anyway) until afterwards. I thought it was dark, different, and brilliant.
Quiet, Because Busy
Posted: Sat 13 August, 2016 Filed under: BurgerCrawl, D4D™, Day Trips, Do More, Domestic, Films, Five Year Plan (now Ten), Food, Getting Organised, London, Single Life, Solo Dining, Travel Leave a comment »It’s been a quiet week chez D4D™, although that’s primarily been because life has been idiotically busy instead. In fact, all of August and September are ridiculous, with very little in the way of spare time. Weekday evenings are (generally, kinda/sorta) available, but weekends and so on are completely blocked out.
Last weekend was spent in London on the Saturday (including food at Benares, which was excellent) and then meeting friends on the Sunday. During the week I was then at the cinema one evening, back in London on another, and handling all the standard domestic tat in the meantime – as well as work, which wasn’t an easy week, with lots of rewrites and rethinks of stuff that had been written a while back.
This weekend, today was spent (again) in London, visiting Blues Kitchen and MeatMarket, and then seeing Romeo and Juliet at the Garrick Theatre. Tomorrow is likely to be a daytrip somewhere, and walking round or whatever.
From here, there’s another meal (this time at Hibiscus) and then a concert, a birthday event, and the Threepenny Opera at the National.
September is even dafter, including : Meatopia, watching The The’s “Infected” film, and seeing The Alchemist and Doctor Faustus – both at the Barbican, so I’m there three weeks on the trot, as I’ll use their parking for Meatopia as well. Finally, at the end of September, I actually have a week away, down in Cornwall. Much-needed currently, it has to be said.
I’ll be writing more stuff here to be going on with, but that’s why it’s been quiet round these parts over the last week or so.
Ridiculously Organised
Posted: Fri 19 February, 2016 Filed under: Cinema, Day Trips, Domestic, Films, Geeky, Getting Organised, London, Thoughts, Travel Leave a comment »So far, this year has been pretty non-stop with travel, visits, concerts and idiot day-trips (mainly to see concerts) and I’ve kept on saying that I must calm things down a bit, build in some time for myself and so on.
And I’m trying to, I really am.
But then cool stuff comes up that I want to go to – which means I now have plans all the way through this year. Not every weekend, or anything similar – but there’s already stuff planned right the way through to December.
The latest one, last night, was finding out that the Royal Albert Hall is doing a showing of Aliens – with the soundtrack performed by a full orchestra, as a celebration of the 30th anniversary of its release. Even more fortuitously, it’s on the weekend of my birthday. Oh, I am so there.
And so yes, tickets are booked for it. I’d already got stuff booked in for December as well, so as it turns out, November was the only month this year without something already booked in.
Now my main challenge will be to not book up the rest of the year, and suddenly realise I’ve had ridiculously few ‘downtime’ weekends. Again.
Too Much Thinking
Posted: Thu 31 December, 2015 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Films, Thoughts, Weirdness, Writing Leave a comment »Over the Festering Season, I watched (yet again) Die Hard. I still like it as a film, even though it is barmy.
But something occurred to me this time that hadn’t before. And that’s this…
Hans Gruber’s plan is absolutely reliant on the FBI turning off the power for the Nakatomi Plaza, in order to get through the final lock.
The FBI are there only because John McClane has called the police, and everything has escalated from that point.
So…
What would the plan have been, if the entire takedown of the Nakatomi Building had worked perfectly? No word out, no hostage situation, nothing – so the police and FBI would’ve known nothing at all.
How would that’ve worked, without that reliance on their plan being messed up, and a rogue operative like John McClane being able to call the police and inform them of the situation?
And yes, I know, I think about this kind of thing way too much. I can’t help myself.
Cinema Seating
Posted: Sun 27 December, 2015 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Films, People, Seeing Films, Stupidity, Weirdness 2 Comments »This year, my local cinema has started a process where people book specified seats, rather than just “first come, first served seated” I don’t mind it at all, it makes sense and should make life easier for everyone.
Except, well, people.
Every film I’ve gone to see, there’s been a noticeable percentage of the people who either don’t sit in their booked seats (for whatever reason) or just seem to be confused by the whole concept of how the seats are organised into rows.
It’s a simple process – or is to me, anyway. If you stand at the front, with your back to the screen, the seats go from row A at the front to row Z (or whatever) at the back, and from 1 on the left to 100 on the right. It’s simple, but it confuses so many people, it’s really quite scary.
Really, is this concept so difficult to comprehend?
Night Will Fall
Posted: Mon 26 January, 2015 Filed under: Advertising, Domestic, Films, Television, Thoughts, Time Leave a comment »Over the weekend, as part of Holocaust Memorial Day, Channel4 showed a documentary called “Holocaust – Night Will Fall” about the films made by the allied forces as they discovered Nazi Germany’s various concentration and death-camps at the end of World War 2, and recorded what they saw and discovered.
While absolutely vile – despite descriptions, you never really see the true results of those camps – it was also essential viewing, and a fascinating story as well. No modern film can truly show the effects of emaciation on bodies – no actor, regardless of dedication, would put themselves to that level – so you might see people being “very thin”, but the recordings on Night Will Fall put all of that into perspective. It’s not something you can look away from, but nor can you believe either the way the bodies are/were, or the sheer number of deaths. The piles of spectacles, the boxes of dentures, the sacks of human hair – they all show how many died, but you still can’t actually understand the sheer scale of the deaths. I truly don’t think anyone can envision millions of bodies.
The other impressive thing about the programme was that Channel4 showed it without adverts. A ninety-minute film, straight through. I thought that said a lot about Channel4 (although the more cynical would say “who would actually buy advertising space in the middle of a holocaust documentary anyway?”) but it’s still a commitment on the part of C4, and I fully believe that should be acknowledged and respected, as they’re primarily a commercial channel.
The film/documentary itself, I just think everyone should see it, and that it should be shown in schools as part of a default history curriculum. That sort of thing just should never happen again. Ever.
2014 Media – Films
Posted: Sat 3 January, 2015 Filed under: Domestic, Films, Media, Seeing Films Leave a comment »In 2014, I saw 64 films at the cinema
As for the film count, I kept track. I do get a summary count from Cineworld – but they operate on May to May, which is the anniversary of when I started the account with the Unlimited Card. So I keep track for the calendar year instead. It’s a bit geeky (I know, who’d have thought, with me) but it’s of interest to me, if no-one else.
I won’t list them all – that’s definitely of interest to no-one else, and my film taste is frequently bloody awful.
Anyway, of those 64 films, only one wasn’t at a Cineworld (as usual, taking Father to see the Hobbit film at the closer cinema, which is an Odeon) because of that Unlimited Card.
Currently, that Unlimited card costs me £16.40 a month, which makes just under £200 a year. (£196.80, if we’re being accurate) A single adult ticket to my local Cineworld cinema is £10.30. Seeing two films a month means the ticket pays for itself.
Now, it’s hard to work out the true savings, because obviously without that card, I would most likely have not gone to see as many films as I have. I’d have still gone, but only seen maybe half as many, even a third as many.
But even if we go right down to seeing a third as many films at full price as I have with the Unlimited, that’d be 21 films at Cineworld. So that would still be £216.30 – and that means that even at the most basic level, I’ve still saved at least £20 on tickets. Looking at seeing half the films, that would be 31 films – which at full price would’ve cost me £320 – and the Unlimited ticket would’ve saved me £122.50.
As with the book target, I don’t know if I’ll see as many films in 2015. I’ll still see a fair amount – and as we’ve shown, as long as it’s more than two a month, that card is paying for itself. That’ll do me for the moment.
Chef
Posted: Fri 4 July, 2014 Filed under: Domestic, Films, Food, Media, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Writing Leave a comment »Last night, I went to see Chef at the cinema. It’s brilliant – if you get the chance, go and see it.
Lots of films (or their reviews/pimps) bang on about being “the feel-good movie of the season/year/decade” – Chef doesn’t, but bloody well should. It’s ace.
The basic premise is simple – talented chef gets bored by humdrum menu/restaurant, has a meltdown at a restaurant reviewer, loses his job, goes off and launches a food van doing what he loves. But the acting, the script – and the food – all raise it up a level. I’ve never been in a film where you hear the audience groan with lust/envy at the presentation of food in the film. They did in Chef. Sure, it’s – kind of – a film for foodies, but it’s not just that. It’s one of those films where you can see that they had fun doing it, that it was an enjoyable thing to work on.
It’s funny, it’s sweet (without being mawkish, cloying, or any of the normal American emotional guff) and it’s just good.
Go and see it. It’s worth it.
The Imposter
Posted: Mon 7 April, 2014 Filed under: Films, People, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Weirdness Leave a comment »Over the weekend, I finally watched The Imposter, a documentary about a man who impersonated Nicholas Barclay, an American teen who had disappeared four years previously.
It’s a fascinating – and very creepy – film, which would be dismissed as unrealistic and impossible if it were a fiction story/film.
The Imposter himself, Frédéric Bourdin is a very strange character, and (in my unprofessional opinion) probably about as much of a pure-bred psychopath as it’s possible to be. The family of Nicholas Barclay are also extremely strange – and yes, I know, editing etc. – and make you wonder just why a family would accept in a stranger that could not possibly be their child/relative.
I don’t know the full story – I doubt anyone ever will – but the documentary makes you think of alternatives, of options, and of coincidence. Maybe it was Bordin’s bad luck to pick Barclay as a person to impersonate – it certainly leads to a much bigger story, and a whole different set of possibilities.
Totally recommended, even if documentaries ‘aren’t normally your thing’
Mislaid
Posted: Fri 28 March, 2014 Filed under: 1BEM, Domestic, Films, Finances, Getting Organised, Kindle, Reading, Stupidity Leave a comment »I am, on occasion, a bloody idiot. Last night was a prime example of that.
I went to the cinema to see the new Captain America film, and also had a meal. Because I was out like that, I took my Kindle, and because it was chiffing cold, I also took a jacket. (I’m normally pretty immune to cold, and don’t bother with jackets or coats at all)
When I got to the cinema, I put the jacket down by the side of the seat, with the Kindle in its inside pocket.
When I left the cinema, I also left the jacket – because it’s not in my mental software to get it, I completely forgot about it. I am, in short, a complete fucking idiot.
I went back this morning first thing (I had a day off anyway, for a number of reasons) to see if they’d found it, but no-one had handed it in. I’ll check again, just in case it’d been held over somewhere, but the odds are that the jacket and the Kindle are gone.
Of course, things could have been so much worse. It could’ve been an expensive coat/jacket, I could have left my wallet in the jacket as well. The Kindle could have had my payment details in it, or personal information. A couple of years ago, the loss of something like this would have knackered me, would have led to some financial juggling and so on just to replace it.
Now though, I’ve already registered it as lost, ordered a replacement, and it’s really not a big problem. It’s annoying – and of course a reminder that I’m a fucking idiot – but it all could have been so much worse. Indeed, it’s gone some way to showing me the changes that have happened over the last year or so, and in that, it’s no bad thing.
CGI
Posted: Mon 10 March, 2014 Filed under: Cinema, Films, Photography, Seeing Films, Technology, Thoughts Leave a comment »Over on Twitter this morning, I saw this image, a behind-the-scenes photo from Pirates of the Caribbean, showing the actors in their motion-capture suits, that allows CGI stuff to be added afterwards and move the same way the actor does.
Now what interested me the most was that the entire outfit – clothing etc. – was also all applied in CGI. And that had never actually occurred to me. I got that the various faces/tentacles/prosthetics were applied by CGI, but for some reason I’d never clicked that the clothing was all computer-generated as well.
Ain’t progress grand?
Giving The Game Away
Posted: Mon 3 March, 2014 Filed under: Advertising, Cinema, Domestic, Films, People, Seeing Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »Yesterday, for want of anything better to do, I went to see Ride Along at the cinema. I expected it to be bad – but screw it, it was free (although if it hadn’t been, I’d have been wanting my money back. Hell, I considered asking for a refund anyway)
It’s definitely an early contender (in my opinion) for the Worst Film of the Year (Mainstream / ‘Comedy’) category, but (as said) I pretty much expected that. Hated it. Although others in the audience at least laughed, so I guess that’s something.
What did surprise me though was how many of the key ‘jokes’ and scenes had been given away in the trailer – but also how many people still laughed at them.
It made me wonder if they’d actually seen the trailer before going to see the film, and if so, had forgotten them in the intervening time.
All very strange.
Bad Writing
Posted: Sun 16 February, 2014 Filed under: 1BEM, Advertising, Bad Ads, Cinema, Films, Pedantry, Writing Leave a comment »Recently my visits to the local cinema have included the trailer below, for a new film called “Winter’s Tale”
Within that trailer is the line
I’ve had no memory for as long as I can remember
which just drives me crackers. Seriously, people get paid for writing piss like that?
I mean, if you’ve no memory then of course it’s for as long as you can remember. Because you’ve got no fucking memory, you insufferable ballbag!
And breathe…
12 Years A Slave
Posted: Fri 10 January, 2014 Filed under: Films, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films Leave a comment »On Tuesday, I went to see the new film “12 Years A Slave” at the cinema. It’s been reviewed as being harsh and unforgiving in its view of American Slavery, but also reported that some members of the audience have walked out, shocked and horrified, and even felt ill and faint.
The film is the story of – well, more accurately it’s based on the story of – Solomon Northup, a free-born ‘African American’ from New York, who was kidnapped and sold into slavery in 1841. In many ways it’s a remarkable story, and a remarkable film.
No-one walked out of the showing I was in – well, none in shock/horror, more just bloody-awful bladder control – but it’s an uncompromising view of slavery and the attitudes towards slaves. It’s another of those films that’s worth seeing, but it’s not one you’ll enjoy, if that makes any sense at all? A couple of the scenes in it are very unpleasant, leading you to wonder how it got away with a 15 certificate – but for me the real horror is in the perception and treatment of slaves.
I know I’m not the most charitable soul – file under “Sherlock, Shit, No” – but I find it truly horrific to see that belief that a slave isn’t human, is just a possession that the owner can do with as they will. All they’re ‘worth’ is the price paid. Nothing more, nothing less – and even seeing them exchanged as commodities, a way of passing on that debt. I know it happened (and probably still does in places) but it’s a vile attitude to have about anyone, regardless of skin colour, ethnic origin, gender, belief, or anything else.
It’s a grim film, and hard to watch in places, but it should be seen – and seen by lots of people – almost as an essay in how people shouldn’t be treated.
Captive Audience – Anti-Piracy Ads (Updated)
Posted: Sat 4 January, 2014 Filed under: Advertising, Cinema, Customer Services, Cynicism, Films, Thoughts Leave a comment »Back in October 2012 – fucking hell, is it really over a year since I wrote it? – I wrote about cinema adverts for anti-piracy, which really annoyed me. Basically, the ads are aimed at stopping film/video piracy, but were only being seen by people who’d already paid for a ticket, and were thus – um – unlikely to be pirates in the first place.
The even greater irony being that, of course, pirated films don’t have the anti-piracy adverts on them. (Which I can only see as a plus point for pirated films, to be fair)
Anyway, it occurred to me this week that actually, I haven’t seen one of those adverts in a few months – which is no bad thing.
Maybe all the complaints I made to Cineworld about them have paid off. And if that’s the case, maybe it’s time I start complaining about the bloody awful ones for EE, starring Kevin Bacon. After all, all they do is add EE to the list of people I will never, ever give my money to.
My Films of 2013
Posted: Wed 1 January, 2014 Filed under: Cinema, Films, Geeky, Reviews(ish), Seeing Films, Thoughts, Words, Writing Leave a comment »Yesterday, Karen made a comment on a previous post, and asked for my top five films from 2013. And I thought “Well, why not?”. Although be warned, my taste in films is rotten.
5. Gravity – Probably the smartest sci-fi film (albeit with some bugs still, mainly around orbital mechanics – and the fact Sandra Bullock doesn’t bloody die) of the year, Gravity is short and powerful. Worth seeing in 3D (which is saying something – I’m no 3D fan at all) although I can well imagine it could kick off a dollop of illness in those prone to motion sickness. But that disorientation is almost key to the film, it manages to convey some of how it must feel to be weightless and with no idea what your orientation is.
It also gets a lot of the tech stuff right (although a fair amount wrong, as well) as well as keeping the story tight. I was in two minds about seeing it, if I’m honest (not being a massive fan of Sandra Bullock at the best of times) but I’d say it’s probably the best thing she’s done – in my opinion, anyway.
4. Elysium – Another smart sci-fi, with a dark ‘them and us’ premise that seems to be becoming all the more feasible. Hell, even Jodie Foster was good in it – which is a real revelation, as usual I can’t abide her in films.
The basic premise – that as the majority of the world’s population get poorer, the rich opt to take off to a space environment/station, where they carry on their lives, with the best of technology, medical care etc., effectively leaving the poor to their own devices – is pretty dark, but also (I found) very believable, even though you know the required leaps in technology would be huge. I’m a fan of the director’s previous stuff (particularly District 9, another near-ish-future scifi) and also looking forward to his next film.
3. Iron Man 3 – Robert Downey Jr as Iron Man, written and directed by Shane Black? I’m *so* there. IM3 lived up to its premise, far more than 2 did. Indeed it pretty much ignores 2 for the heap of crap it was. Smart snappy dialogue, some great action scenes, a glorious twist (that again seems ever more feasible in reality) and Robert Downey Jr just being himself. You can usually tell when people had fun making the film, and that comes across in this one.
And yes, I’ve even ended up watching it again on TV over the Festering Season. And it’s still fun, even when you know all of how it works out. Besides, just how damn good an actor is Guy Pearce?
2. Pacific Rim – I never expected anything more from Pacific Rim than what was in the trailers – big robots fight big monsters. If you expected more than that, you were – at best – frighteningly optimistic. But going in with no expectations more than that, I loved this film. Yes, it has some epic bugs and plot holes – the biggest being “if they’re clones, how can one be pregnant, FFS” – which rankle more on repeated viewing. (And yes, I’ve seen it rather more than once!) But still, epic effects, an absolutely cracking soundtrack – which I also bought – and it’s just ridiculous, fun, and probably the most entertaining film (for me) of the year. So why isn’t it at number one?
1. Mud – And the answer to that is ‘because Mud is’. I don’t know why this appealed to me as much as it did, but it’s probably the film that stuck with me the most through 2013. Matthew McConaughey has really grown on me as an actor since he’s stopped doing all the rom-com shit, and he’s really pretty versatile. This one’s more ‘American Mythology’ than anything else, I suppose – matched up with a doomed love story, coming-of-age stuff, and a whole lot more. For whatever reason, I just really liked this one.
And just for fun (and I won’t even credit them with links!), my five worst films have been…
5. White House Down – I was aiming for brainless entertainment. I got brainless.
4. I Give It A Year – I have no idea why I even went to see this. Romcom tat that was about as funny as infected piles.
3. The Counselor – Great expectations from a great trailer, but the film just wasn’t what had been expected. Beautifully shot, and some great set-pieces, but all told a real disappointment of a film.
2. Ender’s Game – One of the few this year that left a really bad taste in the mouth – the whole child-soldier thing, with some very dark morality (and no, I hadn’t read the book, so didn’t know what to expect) and again that feeling that somehow it’s not a concept that America would have any great issues with in the future. All-told, really quite unpleasant.
1. Only God Forgives – In a similar vein to Counselor, a film that didn’t live up to it’s trailer, and turned out in truth to be a very different film from that portrayed. Very arty, beautiful, but utterly up itself. Probably a good film when you’re in the mood for an art-house essay about violence, vengeance and [whatever else] but I wasn’t, so I really didn’t like it.
But bear in mind, there’s a lot of others just outside that list – including Last Stand, Man of Steel, Pain and Gain, and The Paperboy…