Murdered And Left To Die
Posted: Fri 22 September, 2017 Filed under: Domestic, Literacy, Milton Keynes, News, People, Stupidity Leave a comment »Every so often, it’s my misfortune to go onto a local news site – in this case the MK Citizen – to find out about something that’s going on.
However, sometimes the ‘other news’ section produces gems of the lost art of sub-editing, like this…
Now OK, it’s a terrible story and so on. But really, “murdered and left to die”?!? Fuck sake. That one’s not even difficult to parse and go “Hang on, if he was murdered, he was already dead, and couldn’t have been left to die.“. Or is that just me?
First Impressions
Posted: Sat 17 December, 2016 Filed under: Advertising, Bad Ads, Business, Catering, Cynicism, Literacy, Thoughts Leave a comment »It’s funny, sometimes, how a first impression – and sometimes even just a single word – can colour one’s judgement and feelings about something.
While geeking about yesterday, I did a google search for ‘Zucchini’ – a programme on TV was showing zucchini (courgettes) that were very different to the ones I recognise as courgettes, so I had a look.
And there on that results page, the second result was for Zucchini Restaurant in Batley, Yorkshire. It looks like this…
Yep – the first word of text on the site contains a spelling mistake. On an Italian word. For an Italian restaurant.
And just like that, I know I don’t want to go. If that’s their attention to detail, I’m out. Simple as that.
Badly Worded
Posted: Wed 30 March, 2016 Filed under: Advertising, Bad Ads, Central Bedfordshire Council, Customer Services, Education, Literacy, Thoughts Leave a comment »Just now, my local authority (Central Bedfordshire council) tweeted this, which is hilariously badly-worded…
I replied, asking them if they meant that it was an event for underage drinking/drinkers, or if they meant it to be an event informing about (and/or preventing/reducing) underage drinking – as it certainly looked like the former.
In fairness, they then responded, and removed the original tweet.
But still, it made me laugh, picky and pedantic bastard that I am.
[UPDATED]
They then replaced that tweet with this one…
It really isn’t a good day for Central Beds’ social-media team. But it’s a very funny one for me…
Signage
Posted: Fri 29 August, 2014 Filed under: Commuting, Cynicism, Driving, Literacy, M1, M25, Thoughts Leave a comment »At the moment I seem to spend far too much of my available non-work time on the road, so I notice stuff around me.
Over the last couple of weeks one of the motorway gantries on my route (the ones with speed cameras on) has been out of action, so there’s been a small – but noticeable if you pay attention – yellow sign saying
Camera not in use
Today though, I noticed that it has changed, and now says
Camera now in use
And lo, there we go, seeing it flash on speeders.
It just struck me as interesting, the simple alteration of one letter that means so much, and changes the whole thing – and I wonder how many people notice/realise.
Attention To Detail
Posted: Fri 9 May, 2014 Filed under: Cynicism, Domestic, Education, Literacy, Pedantry, Thoughts Leave a comment »While filling in my postal vote last night, I noticed this on the paperwork…
The red dot is added by me, just to highlight the error.
But really, how can I be assured that my local authority is capable of anything efficient when they can’t even get things right on a bloody envelope?
Kindle Replacement
Posted: Tue 29 October, 2013 Filed under: Customer Services, Domestic, Literacy 2 Comments »I’ve waffed on before about having bought a Kindle e-book – nearly two and a half years ago – and also about when the one-before-this-one broke, which is when I had to buy a replacement.
Much as I like using the Kindle in general, the display in particular seems to be pretty fragile. I suspect it’s because it’s a glorified LCD display, and they’ve always been a bit flaky on that score. I don’t know why they’re so breakable, but they are. I’m not at all heavy-handed with mine, but I’m on my fourth. (with, as below, a fifth soon to arrive) And that’s with having a decent protective case as well. I suspect there must be some kind of twist/flex that just does for them.
Anyway, over the weekend, the latest one – bought in June – broke. I don’t know what had happened to it, I took it out of my bag/backpack, opened the case, and the screen crystal was cracked. (i.e. the screen itself isn’t cracked, but the [whatever] film inside it is, so when I turn it on, half works, and half doesn’t)
Fortunately, Amazon’s customer services are excellent when it comes to the Kindle. (I can’t comment on any other eventualities, I’ve only ever used Amazon customer service when it comes to the bloody Kindle) I filled in the ‘Contact us’ form on the site, clicked “Call me now”, and they did. Straight through, spoke to someone, explained the problem. No quibbles, no hassles, they’re sending out a new one (due to arrive today) and I can then use the packaging from that to return my existing device – postage paid!
Of course, re-downloading all the content is still likely to be a pain in the tits (if the last time is anything to go by) but I can at least get on with doing that when I’ve some spare time.
In the meantime, I’m back to the printed word instead of the displayed. I’ve got to be honest, it feels a little bit odd.
Neil Gaiman, “Fortunately, The Milk”
Posted: Wed 16 October, 2013 Filed under: Domestic, Gigs, Literacy, London, Reviews(ish), Sociable, Words, Writing Leave a comment »
Last night I was in London to see Neil Gaiman‘s one-off reading of his new children’s book, “Fortunately, The Milk” at the Methodist Central Hall in London, (also known as Central Hall Westminster) which was also fortuitously a friend‘s birthday (I won’t say which one) As it turned out, we also bumped into Clair
It was excellent. I’d been lucky enough to get tickets when they went on sale, but I know it sold out pretty quickly. The tickets also included a special signed copy of the book as well, so definitely value for money.
It’d been billed as “with special guests”, but with no real clues as to who might turn up – and it turned out that (among others) Neil’s wife, Amanda Palmer came along as a surprise – even to Neil – and Lenny Henry was also there, along with Mitch Benn, and live drawings from the book by Chris Riddell. (who is just ridiculously talented) There were several others who I didn’t immediately recognise, although some research has helped on that score.
The book itself is brilliant – if you’ve got spawn, add it to the Christmas list – and the performance of it was great, with lots of humour, and a brilliant atmosphere all the way through.
As for the venue, well, I want to visit that again and look at it properly – it’s quite amazing in and of itself, and even more so when you look at the history of the place. It’s spectacular inside, and totally not what I’d have expected from the name. It’s about as restrained and subtle as Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
A brilliant evening, even with a jam-packed train ride home. (Apparently there was some sporting event on at Wembley as well, which meant lots of happy football fans)
Not Quite An Apology
Posted: Thu 3 October, 2013 Filed under: 1BEM, Cynicism, Literacy, People, Sweary, Thoughts, Words 2 Comments »One of the phrases that keeps on annoying me at the moment is the current ‘approved’ terminology for an apology
We’d like to apologise for [x]
Why does it annoy me? Because if you look at it, it’s not actually an apology. It’s a mealy-mouthed excuse. “We’d like to apologise for [x]” isn’t the same as “We are really sorry about [x]”
I know it’s probably only me that even notices this kind of thing, but regardless, it’s an annoyance.
If you’re sorry for something, say you’re sorry. Apologise. Don’t tell me that you’d like to apologise – because that’s not actually apologising. It might as well say “We’d like to apologise, but won’t, because well, fuck you”
Just say “Sorry”. Don’t wank around the bushes with it. Say you screwed up, apologise, move on.
Apostrophes
Posted: Wed 26 December, 2012 Filed under: Charm School, D4D™, Education, Literacy, Writing 1 Comment »One of the better explanations I’ve seen for using apostrophes and abbreviations. (And I didn’t write this originally, honest)
Maybe if it were taught like this in schools, people would remember it better.
Critical Reading
Posted: Fri 16 November, 2012 Filed under: Advertising, Creativity, Cynicism, Education, Food, Literacy, Pedantry, Thoughts 6 Comments »As has been observed many times over the years, I can be a really picky/pedantic bastard – particularly when it comes to spelling, punctuation, and literacy in general. And it’s true, I am all of those things.
Today I’ve been proof-reading a menu for the work Christmas Do (of which more at some other point) – and with some of the errors, had to check the original menu.
So – would you still go to a place whose menu has spelling errors? I realise that the typing and publication of the menu won’t have come direct from the chef, and will have been farmed out to someone on reception (or similar) – but really, if chefs / owners are so obsessed about control, wouldn’t that also extend to the menu, and how it represents the establishment ?
In this case, some of the spelling errors are pretty basic – Mascarpone , for example, is mis-spelled. In others, it’s the actual cooking techniques themselves, such as “Ballantine” instead of “Ballotine”. And I just find that a bit worrying – for if there’s that lack of attention to details in the menu, I can’t help but think there might be the same lack of attention when it comes to the food.
World Book Day
Posted: Thu 3 March, 2011 Filed under: Creativity, Domestic, Literacy, Writing 1 Comment »
Today is World Book Day. If you’re not reading something, why not?
Scrabble
Posted: Sun 5 September, 2010 Filed under: Domestic, Geeky, iPhone, Literacy, Sweary 6 Comments »One of the addictions I do have with the iPhone at the moment is the Scrabble® App. It’s not perfect – it cheats, and uses some really dodgy Americanised (sorry, Americanized) words which drive me barmy. But it’s fun, and I’m playing it way too much.
Today though I had a small dollop of success – allbeit in a silly and sweary way.
Yep, I got to swear properly in Scrabble. Aces.
Yes, the word ‘cunt’ in scrabble. And it was allowed! (Scored OK too…)
The full board here…
Can you tell what it is yet?
Litrucy
Posted: Sat 27 February, 2010 Filed under: 1BEM, Domestic, Education, Literacy, News, People, Thoughts Leave a comment »Via Margo and Phiala I came across this story about literacy in Americans, which says that in America someone reading 4-9 books a year is classified as an ‘avid’ reader, and that 1 in 4 [American] people read no books at all. As Margo says, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen similar figures for reading / book buying habits here, too although I can’t currently find a link or evidence of it.
As with Margo, I can’t really recall a time in my life that didn’t have books. My parents read stories to me every night, and that’s where I started learning to read, by learning the patterns the words made and linking them to the sounds they made as my parents read them. I was more than able to read by the time I started school, and I’ve been reading ever since.
I don’t have anywhere near as many books as I used to – if I’d kept all of them over the years, I could probably stock a decent-sized library. Even so, I’ve probably got around four to five hundred books all told, and they’re all the ones I’ll go back to and read more than once. Additionally I’m a regular visitor to the local library – on Herself’s persuasion, admitterdly – but normally get through about 10-20 books a month just through that. If I see books I want to read now – particularly new ones or new authors – I try to get them through the library rather than buying them outright as an experiment, which is what I used to do.
I can hardly even imagine only reading even 9 books a year. I mean really? One book every six weeks? Jesus.
Just as a current example, this week I’ve read (or am currently reading)
- Steel Beach by John Varley (in the car, reading at lunchtimes)
- The Shift by George Foy(also in the car, finished this week before starting Steel Beach)
- Dead and Gone by Andrew Vachss (at home, in the bedroom)
- Missing by Chris Mooney (also at home)
- Spider by Michael Morley (really really crap)
- The werewolf’s guide to life : a manual for the newly bitten by Duncan Ritch
- Left Hand of God by Paul Hoffmann (just about to start)
And that’s a quiet/slow week where I’ve been doing a ton of work as well. Even so, that puts me near the top end of the American average book level for the year within a week. I don’t honestly know how many books I read a year – on that level, it must be a couple of hundred per year.
But more to the point, if that’s my reading level, and the average number of books read per year in the UK is (hey, let’s be charitable) 20 then that still means there’s a whole bundle of people at the other end of the scale who are reading maybe one book a year, or less. And to me that’s really quite scary.
Apostrophe Question
Posted: Tue 2 February, 2010 Filed under: Literacy, Pedantry 4 Comments »One for the pedants out there (you know who you are) because for once I’m just not sure…
In Homebase over the weekend, I ended up looking at seed potato sets. I know, what a classy life. Anyway, reading the back (Hey, I was bored) I saw this…
Is this apostrophe errant or not?
I know that an apostrophe is used in the case of compressions (i.e. “there is” becoming “there’s”) but I’m fairly sure it doesn’t apply in the case of an abbreviation.
So to my knowledge this apostrophe is incorrect, but equally I’ve been known to be wrong on these finer points…
So – am I right? Or is this OK?