Forward Thinking
Posted: Fri 14 December, 2012 Filed under: Commuting, Driving, People, Thoughts Leave a comment »Last night, my drive home (less than twenty miles, all on motorway) took nearly two hours. The cause? A truck with a blown tyre, needing to get it replaced. Because it was an offside wheel, Health and Safety now apparently means that the inside lane needs to be coned off and closed as well, ensuring a safe (or at least comparatively so) workspace for the people replacing the tyre. And I’ve got to be honest, that’s one job I wouldn’t fancy.
I understand that need though, and it doesn’t annoy me. It’s one of those things – it’s not like the trucker planned it to happen, it’s just a facet of the number of miles trucks do. Shit happens.
But while that was the cause of the delays, it wasn’t the reason for the delays. The reason is something that does piss me off – shitty drivers (and particularly the so-called ‘professional drivers’ of trucks, coaches etc.) who don’t move out of the closed lane ’til the last possible second.
In this case, the ‘lane closed’ warnings were in place for eight or nine miles beforehand – and the delays went all that way back. And all of that distance, people were sticking into that lane that they knew was closed – that the signs were reporting as closed. I kept on seeing ‘professional drivers’ bombing down the hard shoulder as well, trying to avoid the stuck traffic. I truly hope those cunts got hauled in by the police and/or Highways Agency, but I’m willing to bet they didn’t.
The only time these (primarily truck-driving) fuck-knuckles moved out of ‘their’ lanes was once the cones were pushing them out, so they had to come in to the next lane, and squeeze in at the last second. It buggers things up, because the people already in that lane then have to move out, or brake and pause to let the fuck-knuckles in, and every time that happens, the jam behind gets worse.
If people moved out in plenty of time, paid heed to the road signs, and worked with the flow of traffic, the entire thing wouldn’t be anywhere near the hassle it proved to be last night.
Oh, who am I trying to kid? It’s never going to happen.
Inside Claridges
Posted: Fri 7 December, 2012 Filed under: Customer Services, Domestic, London, People, Reviews(ish), Thoughts, Travel Leave a comment »On BBC currently there’s a wonderful documentary series called “Inside Claridges”. Obviously it’s a ‘behind the scenes’ look at how Claridge’s Hotel runs – and it’s absolutely fascinating, a true “How the other half live”
The entire thing is quite, quite mad – I understand why and how they do what they do, but it really is potty. For example, taking photos of how a suite is laid out when a guest leaves, so that it can be laid out the same way if/when they return to the hotel in the future. I suppose if you’re paying £5,500 per night it’s the kind of invisible thing you expect – and yes, I think paying £5,500 per night is utterly obscene – but to me, it’s also potty.
All told, it’s a really sweet little series, well worth catching on repeats, iPlayer or whatever. It’s what BBC documentaries should be (in my opinion) about – things that the general viewer will never see, the way other people live, even if those lives are completely antithetical to our own.
Seeking Proofreaders
Posted: Thu 22 November, 2012 Filed under: Charm School, Cynicism, Education, People, Thoughts, Weirdness 2 Comments »One of my favourite stories today is that of the Suffolk school that’s now hiring proofreaders to check for mistakes in teachers reports. Yes, really.
From the story…
Northgate High School said the role would include correcting “spelling mistakes, poor or missing punctuation, incorrect capitalisation” and improving “poor grammar”.
The role at the local authority school pays £14 an hour.
Headteacher David Hutton said the work indicates the “high level of professionalism” at the school.
Surely a better mark of the ‘high level of professionalism’ at the school would be to hire teachers who – you know – are capable of spelling correctly and using grammar properly in the first place? After all, if they’re making mistakes on the reports, I’d be pretty damn sure they were making the same mistakes in lessons…
Waiting / Wasting Time
Posted: Wed 21 November, 2012 Filed under: Domestic, Shopping, Shopping, Thoughts, Weirdness 2 Comments »One of my regular activities (and of course everyone else’s regular activities) is the domestic shop – it’s not something I enjoy too much, but it’s got to be done. And at the same time I find it fascinating in some ways.
Mainly I love observing people, looking at their motivations, habits, and mindsets. I don’t always understand those mindsets and actions – as with the Reverse Parking thing I commented on a while back.
There’s going to be more of these posts, I think – it’s all making me think a lot about people, their psychology, the mindset for shopping and so on. It’s all just in my head a bit.
Anyway – back to the point of this one. Still in the supermarket carpark, I’m afraid.
So here’s the thing – why do people feel the need to park as close as humanly possible to the actual store? Even to the extent of driving round the nearest loop three or four times, rather than finding a space somewhere else? And particularly to the extent of sitting waiting for someone to load their shopping into the car, return the trolley, and then (eventually) drive off, leaving a queue of people behind, and generally screwing up the entire circuit ?
Me, I park further out, dump straight into a parking slot, and get on with the job. Last weekend I managed to do that, go in, shop, and come back out while at least one twat was still waiting for a parking spot on his circuit.
In short, I really don’t get the concept of ‘saving time’ by parking close to the store, if you have to circle repeatedly and wait for a spot.
Hallowe’en
Posted: Wed 31 October, 2012 Filed under: 1BEM, Charm School, Cynicism, Domestic, Festering Season, Hypocrisy, People, Thoughts, Weirdness 1 Comment »Yes, once again it’s that time of year.
The one where, after telling children all year that they shouldn’t talk to strangers, let along accept sweets etc. from strangers, it’s now acceptable – but only for one night (and the following weekend, of course) – to go knocking on doors and – um – accept sweets from strangers.
What could possibly go wrong?
I feel the same about Santa in the Festering Season – again, don’t talk to strangers, but oh, it’s ok this time because you’re talking to Santa and accepting presents. Hey, good move.
In short, ’tis the season to introduce your children to hypocrisy and double-standards. Enjoy.
30 Things
Posted: Mon 20 August, 2012 Filed under: Bankruptcy, Change, Depression, Domestic, Getting Old(er), Getting Organised, Introspective, People, Thoughts 4 Comments »via Blue Witch , I came across Black Dog Tribe‘s “30 things to stop doing to yourself“. It’s a great list – I think probably most people don’t do all of them, but most do some of them, at least.
I’ve copied it here for posterity, and so I can come back to it when I want/need to. It’s particularly relevant for me at the moment, with all the other stuff that’s going on, so I hope it helps others too.
- Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
- Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on. No, it won’t be easy. There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. That’s not how we’re made. In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. Because that’s the whole purpose of living — to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
- Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.
- Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. Yes, help others; but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
- Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you likeeveryone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
- Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
- Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
- Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
- Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
- Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.
- Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse to confront. Making progress involves risk. Period! You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
- Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
- Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company. There’s no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen — in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
- Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
- Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you. Concentrate on beating your own records every day. Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
- Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself this: ‘What’s something I have that everyone wants?’
- Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
- Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, ‘What you did to me is okay’. It is saying, ‘I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.’ Forgiveness is the answer- let go, find peace, liberate yourself! And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too. If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
- Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
- Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.
- Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
- Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
- Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.
- Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Don’t take the easy way out. Do something extraordinary.
- Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either — cry if you need to — it’s healthy to shed your tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
- Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility — you give others power over that part of your life.
- Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out. But making one person smile CAN change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So narrow your focus.
- Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: ‘Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years?’ If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
- Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
- Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.
Enjoy.