Usually at this time of the year I write about what’s happened over the last year, and what I’m planning for the coming twelve months.
That’ll probably still happen – it just won’t be perfectly in line with my birthday this year. How do I know that? Because today’s my birthday, and I’ve done sod-all about preparing those posts and thoughts. Which might be a bit of a hint.
So anyway, today I’m 48. I don’t feel it at all, but there we go, that’s how things work out sometimes.
Anyway, blah, resolutions stuff later.
It’s been awfully quiet here on D4D over the last month – and that’s primarily been because it’s not been at all quiet in reality.
Some things never change, I suppose.
However I do acknowledge that it’s been dafter than usual of late – work stuff kicked in as well as private projects and social life – but I’m hoping things will calm down again from here, so I can do a bit more writing.
In the meantime though, I’m still alive.
The last couple of weeks have been quiet on D4D™ because life got in the way – and life was just stupidly busy.
Over the last two weeks, I have
- Attended the 2019 Lead Developer conference at the Barbican in London (involving driving to London late on Monday, two days of conference and hotel, coming home mid-evening on Wednesday)
- Late-night ferrying of friends after their wedding anniversary meal (and padded out that time by going to the cinema)
- Done a day on a sponsored walk thing with friends at a fitness group I attend – my own contribution was 32 laps of the 600m track set out for the event, adding up to 19.2km (just under 12 miles) which pleased me
- Seeing the parents
- Attending the “Chefs Reunited” one-off meal at Monica Galetti’s “Mere” restaurant – all courses cooked/created by either Monica Galetti or Rachel Humphrey, who worked together at La Gavroche
- Attending “Conversations with Nick Cave” at the Barbican
- Been on-site on two separate days in Chesham
- Done all the usual work schedule stuff as well
- Before the end of this week, I’ll have also attended two food events this weekend.
I must be utterly, utterly barmy.
At the moment, there’s an advert on TV for Just Eat, and it freaks me out a little bit.
There’s one part of it where they talk about people “ordering their usual”, and doing so at a specific time – implying that it’s the same thing every week. And that just weirds me out, that there are people out there who do the same thing every week, who eat the same meals with little to no variety.
At the same time though, it’s odd in other ways. I’m just as bad at being uninspired when it comes to meals and so on – but that’s when I’m just cooking for myself. If I’m paying for it (i.e. a takeaway, a restaurant meal or whatever) then I’m going to go for random stuff that I fancy eating.
So I think it’s the combination – that there are people who are paying for their meal and still only having the same thing at the same time – rather than *just* that it’s the same thing every time.
Anyway, it weirds me out – even though in some ways I’m also a massive hypocrite about it, as I’m semi-guilty of the same thing, but only in the privacy of my own home…
Things have been quiet on D4D of late. Basically, I’m in a bit of a slump, and at the moment I’m not quite sure how to get out of it.
There’s a lot of reasons behind it, but mainly it’s down to an overbearing feeling of stagnation, or being a bit bogged down. I’m used to having change in my life, and at the moment it’s not really there. Some of that is inertia, some of it is still the final stages from the bankruptcy process and some of it is the current state of things. But it all adds up to an overall sludge – and while I know I want things to change, I also don’t quite know what I want to do next, or where I want to be.
Domestically, I’ve been in this house for seven years. That’s by far the longest I’ve been in any one place since I left the family home. I was looking at moving last year when the tenancy came up, but that was only just after the bankruptcy finished, and I didn’t want to push things while it was still showing up on credit checks and the like. So I’m thinking about it for this year – but there’s also nowhere that’s dragging me, nowhere that I’ve been and thought “OK, this is where I want/need to be”, and it’s all a bit up in the air. There’s still time, though.
Workwise, I’ve been working on the same project for more than three years. (Probably closer to 4, all told) And while we’ve got a lot done, there still feels like no end in sight (things keep on being added in to it, or stuff is more complex than initially expected) which doesn’t help. I like contracting in general for exactly this – that each contract is finite – even though they can (and usually do) get extended, they still have an end date where I can say “Nope, I’m done”. This one is open-ended, and it’s feeling more and more like a proper job and blah blah.
Outside of those two things, there’s so much doubt about what’s going on in the UK – with Brexit being delayed even further, it’s left everything in limbo again, of not knowing what’ll happen with it, and what’ll happen with jobs, economy and so on if and when it happens. I can’t deny, that all contributes to the current sense of stagnation.
I’m not depressed – well, no more than usual – and I’m still getting out and getting other stuff done. It’s just that I’ve not got the time or energy for anything extra. I wish I did, but I don’t.
I’m going to keep on working on it, though. I know I need a couple of new projects to be getting on with – but I also need to find the motivation to get it going. That’s where the stagnation is really hurting – I know I need and want to change, but right now the drive to change things is also being blocked.
I’ll figure it out, I know – I always do, and always have done. And hopefully it won’t take too much longer to turn the corner.
On D4D™ it’s been a bit of a quiet month so far.
That’s mainly because it hasn’t been a quiet month in reality, and updating here took a back seat. Mea culpa. Mea maxima culpa.
Thankfully, from here on things are getting a bit quieter for a while, so I’m hopeful that I’ll have the time and brainspace to update here more regularly again.
I’ve got some thoughts and been letting my brain chunter off on a few subjects. With luck that’ll lead to some more posts and so on as well.
It’s been a long old month, considering we’re only three-quarters of the way through it…
It’s been a month since I did an update here – not for any really good reasons, just that I didn’t really feel like writing.
Some of it has been because February was a ridiculously busy month, which left me feeling generally knackered and not in the mood. I’ve done weekends in Newcastle and Manchester, plus day-trips to Somerset, Bristol and Birmingham, as well as several to London. There’ve also been smaller trips and day events that also resulted in not getting home ’til gone one in the morning, and those were all on work-days.
So that’s all not helped my energy levels, and nor has February tending to be just February, with the grey skies and so on that don’t improve my mood or give the sunlight that helps me through. Thankfully the days are getting longer though, and that’s now noticeable.
I’m aiming to get back to some semblance of normality though – although we’ll also see how things go. I’m working on other ideas and so on, and there’s only so many hours in the day (and only so many of those that one can dedicate to writing) Also, it’ll involve trying to find a balance between D4D™ Stuff and Other Stuff.
We’ll see how it all goes. But for now well, at least I’m not dead.