Children’s behaviour ‘linked to sleep’

Well, duh…

Who’d have thought – children’s behaviour can be linked to sleep, or lack thereof.

Shocker.


Low Interest

I know, a couple of quiet days here at D4D™ – for some reason my writing mojo has disappeared recently.

It’s annoying, because I’ve actually got a few things on my mind that could do with being splurged out onto paper (Hello, Google) or screen, just to get them out of my head. But the writing bug just isn’t there, so it’s all still just sat up there, taking up space and not doing much.

In other news, Hound was at the vets this morning – and most unimpressed about it – for some tests, including blood tests and shit tests. (Which has also meant Herself collecting bits of Hound shit in little plastic bottles over the weekend – we needed three days worth!) We’ll find out the results in about a week, but it’s another thing that’s been on the mind, for obvious reasons.

Ah well, I’m sure normal service will be resumed shortly.


More Garden Activities

Following a (much-needed) lazy day on Saturday where very little at all got done, we’ve been a lot busier today. Continuing on from last weekend’s work, we’ve done…

  • Built two small(ish) raised beds (2m x 1m x 20cm)
  • Put together one higher raised bed (2m x 60cm x 90cm)
  • Moved two tons of bark-chip to cover the rest of the veg patch (and some of the chicken run)

So another productive day. The new version of the veg patch is pretty much complete now, with the exception of actually planting stuff. That’s most likely the work next weekend (as well as filling the new raised beds with earth, so that’ll be another ton of dirt moved) and then we’ll be done.

There’s still other stuff to do, of course – but the new version of the veg patch has been one of the big jobs on the list for this year, so it’s good to be nearly done with it.

Mind you, we’re both knackered now.


FC 2009

Sweary, utterly unsafe for work, but still very funny…

F**king C**t 2009…


Bark Chip

As part of our ongoing alterations to the garden and veg-patch (primarily based around using raised beds for growing stuff, rather than the main veg-patch underneath) we’d also ordered about 2 tons of barkchip to cover the bits unused by raised beds.

It got delivered yesterday – slap-bang in the middle of the entrance to the driveway, so no vehicles can get past it. A bike might be able to, but nothing else.

Thankfully we’ve got a horse-shoe drive, so can use the other (much narrower) entrance to it. But you do have to wonder at the sense of leaving it there, rather than on the 20-odd-foot long length of verge between the two drive entrances.

Still, it defines what we’ll we be doing this weekend. Happiness, Joy etc. etc.


Clutching At Straws

Yesterday, I finally got my car back.

It’s got a whole new clutch, along with master and slave cylinders. And yes, I did get to see the old clutch – wow, talk about knackered. Basically, the entire thing had just about exploded – fortunately without breaking the casing or whatever.

It’s not been cheap – just under £800 – but hopefully that’l be me done with the garage for a while.

Fingers crossed…


Conference Conflicts

I’ve already written about being signed up for going to the World Horror Convention in Brighton at the end of March 2010 – which sounds like it’s going to be an interesting event.

However, there’s also the Odyssey 2010 EasterCon for SciFi stuff, which has a considerable appeal to me – except it’s only about a week after the WHC. Bugger.

At the moment I can’t decide between them – I’m more of a fan of SciFi writing than Horror (in general) although I’ve got enough of both genres to qualify on either count, I suspect.

So somewhere along the line, I’m going to have to make a decision – because somehow I can’t see Herself wearing it if I’m away for the best part of two weeks, one after the other…


Accounting and Business

I forgot to mention before, but following on from the farce last month with my fuckstick accountant going bankrupt I’ve now sorted things out with a new one.

As it happens, it’s the accountant who has picked up a lot of the business from the fuckstick one (although not the premises, branding or debts) so the likelihood of him disappearing now is even less likely.

It’s not been an easy process – it’s involved seeing two more accountants, and then figuring out costs, benefits etc. but I’m generally pretty happy with the results, and feel a bit more reassured this time round.

Just for additional fun, it looks like some of the information given to me by the previous fuck-knuckle has turned out to be – well, if not wrong then decidedly shaky. Never a good thing when it comes to trying to avoid the indelicate attentions of HMRC…

Still, at least it’s another thing sorted out (even though I do still have to sign some papers etc. to get it finalised) and off the list.


Upside-Down

I don’t think we’ll be getting any this year, but I love this idea – growing tomatoes upside down, using a hanging-basket bracket, and letting gravity do the work instead of needing to use canes etc to support the growing plants…


Ongoing Projects

Thankfully, in light of the previous post, I still have stuff of my own that I can be getting on with. In fact at the moment I’ve got five or six projects ongoing still, which include…

  • Three websites for different clients
  • At least one writing project
  • Two websites I’m writing myself.

So that should keep me out of trouble. That’s the theory, anyway…


Bored…

So this week in the office I’ve got no work lined up – and nothing for the next few, either.

It’s all a bit weird – at the interviews I was told there was plenty to be getting on with, but now the most recent project has finished, it seems there’s nothing for a while – so I’m sat here twiddling my thumbs a bit.

Guess this is as good a time as any to start looking for new contracts…


Garden Work

So this weekend, the workload between us has involved…

  • Making of two raised beds, as detailed yesterday
  • Filling both raised beds with earth/manure etc. (Pretty much a ton between the two)
  • Redistribution of water from the massive water-butt down to smaller (emptier) ones around the place.
  • Painting of the garden shed
  • The first grass-mow of the season for the prairie (AKA the back garden)
  • Strimming round the edges

So, not really all that busy then. *ahem*


Raised Beds

Among other things, today we’ve built two raised beds (technically three, but two have been joined together to make a double-height one) for the veg patch.

It didn’t start well, but i the end everything combined OK and the last two went together in about 45 minutes each.

They’ve been made from 7″ x 1″ planks (so the double-height is 14″ high) and will work to be part of our new plan for the veg patch – reducing the workload by covering most of the patch in weedproof membrane, and using the raised beds for our crops/veg.

It means we won’t be using all the space, but it does mean we should be able to get on with growing stuff, rather than ending up with a patch that’s primarily great for growing weeds…


XKCD

Related to today’s XKCD cartoon, I love the text that goes with the image…

Somewhere out there is a company that has actually figured out how to enlarge penises, and it’s helpless to reach potential customers.

You know, I’d really never thought of it like that.


Getting Expensive

It’s obviously about to be one of those times where life gets expensive again as things go wrong.

First, there’s the car. Still no word on what needs doing, how much it’ll cost, or when I’ll get it back.

Second, the laptop is definitely getting to be on it’s last legs. The bottom row of keys is getting very tempramental – who knew N was such a used key on my keyboard? – so I may have to go looking at a replacement at some point soon. Joy of joys.

In fairness, I’ve had the laptop for nearly three years, and in that time it’s had a hard life. It’s travelled in my backpack on a regular basis, gets used all the time at home, and is generally a bit of a workhorse. I cracked the case about 18 months ago, which makes CD/DVD use a bit of a challenge (and ejection of said disc even more so) but that wasn’t enough to need a change.

However, a broken/breaking keyboard is rather more relevant – I can’t use it properly if the keyboard’s on the way out. Typing is the main thing I do on the damn thing, in fact.

So I’ll give it a cleanout over the weekend, see if a hoover and/or air-blast will help, but I know it’s on the way out. I’m just prolonging the inevitable, really…


Clutching

Another in my list of “interesting” occurrences this morning…

Driving along, coming up to a roundabout just off the dual-carriageway, and I’m planning to turn right so I’m in the outside lane. I put the clutch in as I come to a stop, and can’t change gear. Come to that, I can’t find the clutch pedal either.

Yep – no clutch. The car’s (fortunately) in neutral, but won’t select a new gear at all. In short, it’s fucked. On the outside lane of a (very fast) sliproad.

In short, it quickly involved calling the police – on 999 no less, not something I make a habit of! – followed by the breakdown people, and then my local garage to let them know the car was going to be coming in on a flatbed recovery truck.

Amazingly, in the half-hour it took to get sorted, no-one ran into the back of the car. Not for want of trying – there were at least four bell-ends who came right up to the back of it, ignoring the flashing hazard lights (and the – perhaps slightly more subtle – bloke stood on the verge by the car) and two even honked their horns before realising I wasn’t going anywhere.

I don’t yet know what the damage is, either. It’s at the garage, and I’ve got a courtesy car for the time being. But quite what’s wrong with it isn’t yet clear. Apparently it’s not just a clutch cable – it might be something hydraulic-y, or something called a master cylinder – which certainly doesn’t sound cheap…

Ah well, we’ll see.


GPP Group shot

Over at Zarias, Zach Arias writes about the process he went through to get the group shot for GPP (Gulf Photo Plus) this year.

I’m always interested in seeing how (and why) photographers take on certain challenges – in this case, taking individual shots of each person in the group, then merging them together into one composite image – and to look at the techniques used, just in case I can find a way to use something similar at some point.

In this case, I don’t know that I’ll ever be in the same sphere as Arias – or the other photographers in the GPP group shot – but it’s still something that’s interesting to see, read and think about.

If nothing else it’s another example of why t’Internet is grand, granting you access to far more of the details of a photographer’s life (or whoever’s life, really) than you ever would do in “normal” life.


Collection Chaos

Ah, you’ve got to love our fuckwitted local authority. When it comes to bank holidays and religous festivals, this year they’ve decided to fuck about with how the rubbish collections are done – only they’ve pretty much forgotten to let their customers (i.e. the residents of the area) know what they’re doing. And they’re not even consistent on what they’re doing.

In the normal world, collections just become later by one day – so if your collection’s on a Monday, it gets collected on a Tuesday, so on and so forth. I can’t recall quite what happened for the Friday collections – I think they just did them on the Saturday instead, so everything was back in sync for the following week. Simple, easy to remember, no messing about.

But now of course, we’re in the world of alternate collections – so the council decides to fuck about with things.

In our case, (a Monday collection) it meant that our normal 6th April collection was supposed to happen two days earlier, on the preceding Saturday 4th April. Only, um, the council forgot to inform people. Oh, they put it in the local press – except that a lot of people don’t get a local paper (we haven’t received the supposedly local free paper since we moved to the village) and don’t bother with the regional EDP. The booklet with all the Bank Holiday timetable revisions came out to us on – um – 6th April.

This Monday’s (recycling) collection was supposed to happen yesterday – but being Easter Monday, they moved that forwards to today. Well, according to the booklet anyway. Only, because so many people didn’t know about last week’s collections being made at least one day earlier than usual, the council only collected from 30% of homes last week.

So they’ve changed things around again – as you can see on Breckland’s revised collection schedule here – and moved the collections two days forward. So our Monday collection now won’t be collected ’til tomorrow.  And how have they let people know about these changes? Um – they haven’t. Supposedly it’s been in the local press – except again, there’s lot of people who don’t bother. It’s not even on the front page of the council’s site – you’ve got to hunt for the bloody thing.

And even better – there’s now a knock-on effect into next week as well. So next Monday’s collection is also delayed, but this time only by one day, so it’ll get collected on Tuesday instead of Monday. Finally, the Friday collection is on a Saturday, and the world returns to normal for the end of the month.

So the supposedly “better” jiggering about that Breckland Council have done with the waste collections for Easter 2009 is actually far more invasive and confusing than the old method.

Ain’t “progress” grand?

Even be


Small Break

So, for once in my life I didn’t have the posts written to see me through a couple of quiet days with D4D™. Quite the rarity, I know.

Still, it’s been an OK Easter break – we got most of the jobs done that were on the list, and a few more besides, so could be worse.  I’ve still got a ton of stuff to do, although there’s only a couple of “urgent” things for tomorrow, so I’ll get on with those in a bit.  Procrastination, hallowed be thy name.

So – I’m sure it’ll be back to normal here tomorrow. But in the meantime, how was your Easter?


Four Days

Ah, the Easter break. Four days where our current plan includes…

  • Building some raised beds for the veg patch
  • Planting raspberry canes, strawberry plants, and any other veg we think of
  • Painting fence panels (assuming it’s not chucking with rain, of course)
  • Planting other stuff

I’m sure there are plenty of other jobs as well. I know, for example, that my own list includes…

  • Finalising my company accounts for the tax year just gone
  • Sorting out paperwork, bank statements etc.
  • Sending out letters to prospective clients
  • Finishing one site’s development
  • Looking at development plans for two others

Who knows, we might even get some relaxation in in those few days as well. We’d better do, anyway.


Tumbleweed

Here in the office, it’s a bloody ghost town today.  Obviously the majority of the people here have decided to take extra days around Easter – and why not? I will be next week – but wow, it’s dead.

As a result, my motivation is less than zero, and there’s not even anyone around to tell me what I should be doing.

*sigh*


Debatable

I’m still unsure whether the driver I followed to work this morning was

  • Stupid
  • Drunk
  • Confused
    Or
  • Insane

Throughout the journey, he would slow down to 30-40mph on the bits of road that were National Speed Limit, then speed up to 50-60mph through villages/towns where a speed limit was actually set.

But what can you do in that situation? The answer (so far as I can see) is “Not a lot”.

Yes, you could (assuming you’ve a hands-free phone) call the police and report the pillock. But (again, as I understand it) they need to see it themselves, rather than relying on witness reports. So they’d have to come along and somehow pull in behind the driver and watch him being a pillock. And there’s no guarantee he’d still be driving by the time they’d got their finger out and sent someone along the road to check anyway.

I don’t know, just a weird start to the day, really.


From Powerpoint To Sanity

Currently, I’m working on a small e-learning project which is absolutely killing me mentally.

The work itself is OK, and the ideas behind it are quite cool. However, the people in charge of the project have put together the entire set of e-learning tests in PowerPoint (AKA The Software of the Devil), with one screenshot per PowerPoint Slide.  All told there’s nearly 200 of these – and they’re not necessarily in order.

Now the order doesn’t matter too much – all this stuff is going into a database, and that’ll handle the question order just fine whether or not it’s out of order. However, having them correctly grouped does make it easier during the transfer to process them out of SatanWare into anything remotely usable.

As it is – and this could be because I’m not au fait with Powerpoint, so there may be some esoteric export function or somesuch that would’ve made life easier – I’ve had to go through the following process…

Phase One

  1. Select PowerPoint slide.
  2. Copy Image to clipboard
  3. Go to Image Software of Choice (in this case Fireworks, but Photoshop would’ve worked too)
  4. Create new blank image
  5. Paste clipboard-copy of image into new image
  6. Save new image as filename.jpg.
  7. Close new image.
  8. Repeat 200 times.

Phase Two

  1. Open each new image one by one in Photoshop/Fireworks (I could do it in batches, but again, one-by-one allows for consistency/sanity)
  2. Add four new layers for answer options (A,B,C,D) and add a pretty arrow pointing to a possible answer for each one.
  3. Make sure that the letter for the correct answer goes to the correct answer
  4. Save new image
  5. Close new image
  6. Repeat 200 times.

In short, it’s utterly soul-destroying.  I’ll just be glad to get it over and done with.


MPG

I don’t see that this post will mark me as anything other than someone with a mild form of OCD, but here we go anyway.

My car has a trip-computer thing with a small number of functions on it – MPG, average speed, miles left in tank, outside temperature, and something else.  I normally leave it on MPG, and over the last few months I’ve been building it up, finding what revs/speed works best for mileage, that kind of thing. Like I said, slightly OCD, geeky as hell, but well, that’s me for you.

Anyway, in the last week, I’d got it to click up to 49.0MPG on the monitor. I’ve no idea whether it’s a real figure, or just an arbitrary “kind of around that figure” thing. I don’t care either way.  I was more than slightly pleased (in a quiet kind of way, because I know this entire thing is epically sad anyway) to have got the car – which is coming very close to the 100,000 mile mark – to be doing 49MPG still.

But over the weekend, the fucking thing reset. No idea why – I started the car up, and clonk, mileage down to 19.1MPG, all the other bits reset, trip meter reset. And I can’t deny, I got quite annoyed by it.

I know, it’s sad, geeky and lots of other epithets. That’s just me. And I get annoyed when things let me down.

Still, I’ll go back to building it back up again, see if I can replicate the problem…


Ron Silver

Blimey, I must’ve missed this one completely – I didn’t know Ron Silver (probably best known from his role as Bruno Gianelli in the West Wing) had died from oesophageal cancer at the end of March this year.

Did you?


What’s That Book?

Recently, my brain has been slightly locked with a question – one even the mighty AQA couldn’t come up with an answer to.

So I’m hoping that posting it on D4D™ might just find someone who knows what the hell it is I’m whittling on about.

Anyway – I read a book a while back, and I’m now trying to remember what the hell the book was. The scene I clearly recall involved one protagonist meeting the other for the first time in a school playground, where they were playing marbles. (At least, I think it was marbles – could’ve been tiddlywinks, or something)

Anyway, Person One knocks one of Person Two’s marbles out of play, and out of school grounds. As a result, Person Two throws one of Person One’s marbles out of the school grounds, and it degenerates into each one throwing the marbles out of the playground.

It’s a stupid scene, but I can’t remember where the hell it came from.

So help me, Interwebs, please…


Timpsons

The Guardian has another interesting interview, this time with the man who owns Timpsons, (the shoe and watch repair people) a company which is doing very nicely during the recession.

He comes across as someone who knows what’s important – maybe more businesses need to have people like this on their boards…


Five Year Plan – Half Way!

Back in November, I made a more basic list of what the plans would be for 2008/9 on the Five Year Plan.

I’m now halfway through – both the 2008/9 year, and the Plan itself. Which also means that in 2½ years time from today, I’ll be 40. Shite.

Anyway, here’s the list from November, along with progress comments.

  1. Sort out the mortgage renewal along with Herself (March/April)
  2. Write and Launch the main site ideas that are in my head at the moment, and see how they do
    • Daily Word Challenge : launched
    • Creativity Merger Site : done
    • Two Three other primary sites : under development
  3. Promote one of the other sites I’ve done, which has a big dollop of potential – probably going to sack this one off
  4. Complete the NCFE Photography qualification/course – ongoing, 2/3s of the way through now
  5. Redesign my photography site – considering a significant change of theme on this one
  6. Promote the photography and site more – working on it
  7. Write at least one more big piece to get it out of my head at last – getting there
  8. Possibly redesign D4D™ a bit – I know, I’ve been talking about it now for years
    Oh yeah, and…
  9. Lose some weight, as my plans for doing so in 2008 have emphatically failed – primarily due to zero motivation to do so, but also due to life over-riding gym etc.  Ahem, yes, well, absolutely bugger-all done on this one.

Promotional

Going by the number of promotional emails they’ve sent me this week, I guess MalMaison hotels are crying out for more business.

I’m a bit surprised, to be honest – I’ve been a fan of the Malmaison range of hotels for a number of years now, although (and I guess this proves the point of why they’re doing the promotions) I don’t use them often. Mind you, some of that is due to the fact we don’t do a mass of travelling at the moment, and I’ve been working in Norfolk rather than all over the place.

Then again, if I do work away from home, I’d have a tough job of justifying a MalMaison stay at £140+ per night to the taxman/accountant/auditor, rather than using (for example) a Premier Inn or Travelodge for half that…

So I suppose that yes, they are crying out for the business. But all the same, just this week I’ve received from them :

  • A promotion for spring stays at a discounted rate
  • A promotion for discounted Sunday nights
  • A promotion for discounted Monday nights

So, Malmaison (and their marketing department) – There is such a thing as looking desperate, you know.


Finding The True Self

This interview/article is a lovely piece of writing, and makes for a fascinating story.

For years, Maurice Pepper had a secret he couldn’t reveal, even to his wife. It wasn’t until she was taken into care that he made a life-changing decision.

It’s simultaneously sad to read of someone who’s hidden bits of themselves for sixty years, but also a joy to read of the changes since those hidden parts have been revealed.


Outages

You know, in the six months I’ve been in the current workplace, there hasn’t been one day where the internet connection and/or network have stayed up all day without needing to be re-started by the IT department.

Every bloody sodding day, at some random point, the connections die. Most of the time it’s the proxy server they’re using, so it “just” needs a service restarting.  But not once has anybody said “You know, this is effing ridiculous – let’s look at the logs and see what’s breaking, so we can fix it or upgrade it”

In fact, no-one seems to care at all. It’s just another of those things that always happens, always has happened, and always will happen.


Abbreviated

This post is about RSS feeds and so on. If you neither know nor care what an RSS feed is, don’t even bother clicking on the ‘more’ link below…

Read the rest of this entry »


Black and White

Last week I wrote about having new visitors to the house – including the two cats from up the road, who keep on coming in through the new cat flap. We’ve christened them both Bob (Ninja Bob and Scaredy Bob, to be exact – an explanation of these will follow at some point)

What we couldn’t work out at the time is how they get in to the house without Hound making a fuss. On a couple of occasions, we were sure they’d walked right past her. (and in one case, jumped over her, although that was on the way out of the house rather than coming in) She’s usually quite wary round Psycho Cat, but can be guaranteed to make a racket when new people come to the house – or when people slam car doors anywhere in the vicinity, including up to three doors down. So why wasn’t there any noise or fuss when the Bobs came in?

This morning, we found out why.

Hound just stands next to the Bobs, looks at them, and wags her tail. And I mean really wags, not just a little flicker- she’s happy to see them.

I’m sure it’s because they’re black and white, so the idiot twatting Hound just thinks they’re collies, like her – only smaller.


April Fools – What He Said

My attitude to April Fools day really can be summed up by the words of John Scalzi…

I will not be trying to fool you all here today. Rather, I will feed you lies and disinformation on any day I damn well feel like doing it. I may have done it already, in fact. You don’t know. You will never know. That’s what makes it fun.

That is all.

Yup – what he said.


The Chicken Run

It’s coming up for a year now since we enlarged the chicken run (well, we did it at the end of July, so it’s about 8 or 9 months) and I’m debating what to do with the thing.

The problem is, of course, that the three chickens have pretty much pecked the place to death, so there’s not much except dirt and nettles in there at the moment. There’s a couple of bits in there for the amusement of the chickens (hay bales etc.) but I’m still thinking about what we should do with the ground in there.

I suppose there’s three options really…

  1. Leave it as it is
  2. Put new turf in the entire area of the run
  3. Cover the run in bark-chip or similar (wood mulch, whatever)

With the exception of “leave it like it is”, both the other options would also involve setting up a smaller temporary run (possibly on the veg patch, let ’em peck away at the weeds and mare’s tail) for a couple of weeks, while we got the work done.

I know that Blue Witch recently re-turfed her chicken run but I haven’t yet decided between turf and bark-chip/wood mulch.  I suspect that over time, the wood mulch would give them something they could keep on pecking into etc., but it’d still have to be replaced/cleared up every so often, due to the quantity of crap that chickens produce.

It’s something that’ll be decided sometime in April, I’m sure.


No Fools

Just so you know, as per usual, I’m not going to be posting anything “special” for April Fools Day.

I just can’t be arsed.


Another Pointless Day

Well, all told the work day was a total fuck-knuckle. Abso-pigging-lutely pointless.

By my reckoning, I actually worked for 30 minutes today – at most.

I know, I shouldn’t complain at getting paid to do chuff-all (or very close to chuff-all, anyway) but it does my head in – I far prefer to be busy, rather than be bored and doing feck all.

I need to find something new to do, that’s for sure.


Knackered

For some reason – I suspect primarily a reaction to the clocks messing about over the weekend – last night I was just not at all sleepy.  In fact, I finally dropped off at around 3am, and then was up again at 6am to go to work.

All of which conspires to mean I’m utterly knackered today, and not really in the mood to do much at all. Mind you, that’s probably no bad thing, as I’ve got absolutely cock-all to do today except sit around and see if the latest thing I’ve written and launched for the company has any problems now it’s gone live and is being used by people.

So far in the 22 hours since it went live, we’ve found one tiny bug, one significant one that wasn’t caused by me, and one blip of weirdness that no-one can explain.  And neither of the two fixes has taken me more than five minutes to do.

The problem is, with being this whacked, I’d rather be being busy, and having stuff to do. Sitting around doing fuck all is likely to result in me falling asleep at my desk…


Misguided Motivations

As I may have mentioned before, sometimes a phrase or quote from someone just leaves me bemused, and wondering what the hell they were thinking at the time.

This happened to me again yesterday, reading the story about how a communications officer for British Transport Police lied about a significant fact,  which then caused a delay in finding the body of a missing woman.

He wrongly claimed to Essex Police that trains were fitted with sensors that would detect any collision on the line. This affected the police’s “perception of the likelihood of Natasha being on the railway lines”, the report said.

“The communications officer admitted he lied to an Essex police officer, initially telling IPCC officers that he did so to end the call which would allow him to get on with his job, and that he actually had no knowledge of train sensors,” the report said.

Now really, you’ve just got to wonder about the motivation there, haven’t you?

I guess it could be paraphrased as “I told a lie so I could get rid of the call, and go back to doing something else. Sure, the call was about a missing 17-year-old girl, but that wasn’t my problem or my job.”

I just think the entire thing’s weird, let alone the motivation for using that as an explanation of why he made that mistake…


Parking

Today’s XKCD comic is just great.

It also probably sums up at least one reason why Herself will never allow me near oxy-acetylene cutting gear…


Back In The Office

And after a week away from it, I’m back in the office. Yuck.

The 6am start came as an unpleasant shock, having been able to actually catch up on some sleep while away. I may have to consider moving things round a bit, so I can sleep more in the morning, go in later, and come home later. I don’t know.

The problem with that is that – as I’ve said before – my core deep sleep hours are 7-9am. If I can sleep through that period, I feel fine and caught up on sleep. However, waking up in the middle of that period wrecks me completely. So in that context, it’s probably better for me to be awake and operational earlier, as most places don’t actually like it if you don’t come in ’til 10.30 or so…

Anyway, I’m back in the office, and the day looms ahead…


Bizarre Priorities

While I’m definitely not a member of the Jacqui Smith fan-club, I do find the hysteria about the expenses claim error (where the expenses included two porn films her husband had watched) to be more than a little bizarre.

Firstly, this error is about a mere £10. Not exactly an earth-shattering amount, I’m sure you’ll agree.

Secondly, the claim actually went through – this is all a storm about something that has already happened. I don’t understand why it isn’t about “Well why wasn’t the claim checked properly in the first place?“. At least that would be justified. After all, most HR/Payroll departments check expenses claims pretty thoroughly in my experience – so why isn’t it the same for MPs?

And finally, why are there calls for Smith to resign about this expenses claim – for only £10, don’t forget – when they’re not clamouring for it over the other £116,000 that’s in doubt on other expenses claims she’s made?

It’s all just a bit bizarre…


Summer Time

Ah, the start of spring – the clocks went forward this morning, and that should be A Good Thing™.

The minor downside of Daylight Saving Time is that in theory I should change the way the time is displayed here on D4D™. Only I can never be arsed – so the entire site runs in GMT, regardless of whether it’s GMT or BST that we’re on.

Primarily this is because WordPress goes a bit odd when it comes to changing times – it becomes a global change, and all the time-stamps on the earlier posts get changed too. So I can’t be bothered to faff that much, and thus the decision was made to simply stick with GMT.

It’s not too much of a hassle, though – I just have to remember we’re in Summer Time when it comes to knowing when I want a future-post to go live.

Anyway, stop reading this rubbish, go out and enjoy the sun instead.


Back to “Normal”

Today is when we were supposed to come back from our holiday. As it is, we’ve been able to get a load of jobs done, which otherwise would only have still been waiting for us when we got back today.

There’s still a whole bundle of stuff that needs doing, but one hell of a lot less than there’d have been if we’d spent the week in Scotland.


Far Too Organised

This time next year, the World Horror Convention will be in Europe for the first time – and it’ll be being held in Brighton.

At the moment, the cost for a ticket (or Attending Membership, if you prefer) is a mighty £60. Yes, £60.

Needless to say, I’m going to be going.  I don’t know who’ll be attending yet (for obvious reasons) although some names have already been confirmed, but regardless I think it’ll be a fun trip.


Repeating the “Offensive”

Yet again, the BBC manages to have a story about people complaining something is racist and/or offensive, yet somehow feel they can still get away with republishing it.

In this case, David Jason told a joke that caused offence (and not just because it’s piss-poor) and then apologised for it. And there, at the bottom of the story, is the “offensive” joke in all it’s glory.

I know I’ve said it before, but just how does this work? If it’s actually offensive, the BBC should receive complaints about publicising it to a wider audience. If they don’t receive complaints, does that mean the joke isn’t actually offensive? And if that’s the case, what’s the story in the first place?

But it seems to me that the BBC (and, in fairness, most of the other media organisations) seem to revel in this “Oh, someone said something offensive, so now we’ve got to report it and repeat it” attitude. I don’t know if they get away with it because it suddenly comes under “it’s in the public interest”, or if they’re all just a bunch of deceptive double-standards bullshit bandits.

Ah, I’ve answered my own question, haven’t I?


Reading Material

Back in November, I received £30 of Book Tokens, and it’s only been this week that I’ve had the chance to use them – one of the downsides of shopping primarily online is that you don’t easily get to use things like Book Tokens.

Anyway, a visit to one of the local bookstores produced…

All utter rubbish, I know – but they should all be entertaining.  And all for the princely cash sum of £2.15. Can’t be bad.

[Additional] Yes, I know I’ve piss-poor taste in reading-matter. I don’t care – I’ll enjoy all four (even if “New Moon” then does go down the charity shop to be passed on to someone else)


It’s Time – Part Two

This post follows on from the one yesterday (Imaginatively titled “It’s time – part one”) about mortgages and overpayments…

So yes, the mortgage deal we’ve got allows for overpayments, and I’ve got some ideas on getting those overpayments under way. And basically, it all comes filed under “Get your damn finger out, Lyle“. Or, as the title of the post says, “It’s time.”

Which means that while we’re away, I’m going to have spent some time writing some spec letters to companies, pimping myself and my company. Once we get back, they’ll get printed out and go in the post. Then it’s the fun of following up on the letters, and seeing what work I can get.

At the same time, well, it’s time for me to get back to contracting. I don’t just want to go back to it, I need to. Sure, the current place might provide stability, but it’s driving me a) crackers and b) homicidal. I need to change. I need to work on changing back to a situation I’m happier in, and bringing in extra work for myself.

And then there’s also the writing and photography. I need/want to make more of those things if I can. I don’t know that the photography will ever be a money-spinner – it’s a crowded market, to say the least – but I’ll do what I can, either with commercial-based stuff, or with a couple of other ideas that might just make money through photography in other ways. And no, I don’t mean porn.

In short, it’s time. It’s time to get my finger out, to get back to the way I used to be, and to sort my head and life out in that context.

It’s time.


New Visitors

This week, we appear to have some new regular visitors to the house/garden…

  • A pair of mallard ducks, who seem to like the front garden. The drake appears to have one leg shorter than the other (he limps) so he’s already been christened “Stumpy“
  • A pair of pheasants, who also seem to like the front garden
  • The two black-and-white cats from down the road seem to be becoming more friendly with Psycho Cat, and they’ve been found inside the house a few times. (The ‘benefit’ of a cat-flap)  These two have been named “Ninja Bob” and “Scaredy Bob”, for reasons I can’t be arsed to go into right now.
  • A new black-and-white from somewhere else has also been seen today. He’s been christened “Not Bob” (or, in my techie notation “!Bob”)

I don’t know how these new visitors will all shape up. I suspect that Stumpy and his mate are looking for somewhere to nest, as are the pheasants. They’ve all certainly found the supply of bird food etc. on the front grass (Calling it a “lawn” would be too fancy) which is probably a factor.  Of course, how that’ll factor in with the influx of moggies at the moment, gawd only knows…


It’s time – Part One

While we’re taking a break, the redone mortgage will (hopefully) be wading it’s way through the paperwork mire. We did all the application guff a couple of weeks back, signing up for a 5-year fixed-rate deal which looks to have been pretty much the best option for us. No fee, no transaction charge, and an OK interest rate.

We’re also changing lenders – Nationwide weren’t able to provide us with anywhere even close to the best deal – plus their valuation calculator is so wildly wrong in our case that it’s just about unusable. So we’re moving on.

The interest rate we’ve got isn’t as low as the base rate- but we never expected it to be. However, it’s a rate we’re happy with, and it lets us know what we’ll be paying between now and 2014, regardless of what interest-rate idiocy goes on between now and then. And that works just fine so far as I’m concerned.

We could almost certainly save ourselves a bit of money by just making some payments at the SVR rate, but I feel much happier with having the fixed-rate deal sorted out, and making the payments based on that. After all, when the rates go up – and they will – there’ll be a ton of people currently paying on the SVR rate who suddenly try to apply for a fixed-rate deal, at which point I’d lay money on the lenders immediately upping the charges for those deals.  So I’m happier being “stupid” (according to a couple of people I’ve talked with) and doing what we’ve done.

The other part of the deal is that we can overpay – and overpay by a significant amount each year – the mortgage. And that’s something I’d very much like to take advantage of.  I’ve written before about how I find the mortgage debt is something I’m very aware of so I’d be a lot happier to be paying off over the odds, and reducing the interest paid by a significant amount at the same time.

I’ve some ideas for how I’m going to work on the overpayments – but that’s a post for tomorrow.


Pay Assessments

Recently, the current workplace has announced a change to the assessments/appraisals procedure that’s used to define pay rises.  And because of the current financial climate, they’re doing everything they can in order to get out of giving any pay rises at all.

Firstly, anyone who’s been here less than nine months doesn’t qualify at all for an appraisal. There’s only one “full” appraisal per year, and an interim one come Augustish, so they’ve got to wait ’til this time next year before a pay rise can even begin to happen.

Back in August, the “interim” appraisal laid out some goals (assuming you’d been in your current position for more than six months) that each person should have attained over the year between “full” appraisals.The chances of anyone completing all these goals is – to say the least – minimal.

If people haven’t completed all their goals, then they need to have a good reason why not – including evidence of what they were doing that meant the goals weren’t completed.  The requirement for evidence has only been revealed in the last two weeks.  Without evidence, they’ve no chance of getting a good appraisal.

If people have completed all their goals, then they will score a “2” out of 4. A score of “2” means ‘does the job adequately’, but doesn’t equate with a pay-rise.

To get a pay-rise, a person has to score at least a “3”, and to be assessed by their line-manager as being worthy of a “3” as well.  To get a “3” they would have to show evidence of having completed everything in their own job, all their goals, and having been helpful and hyper-motivated to other people outside the team they’re in.

To get a “4”, I think you’ve just got to be Buddha, Gandhi and Mother Theresa all rolled into one. With some humility on the side, obviously – it’s no good being perfect without it…

Just about everyone now knows that they’re not going to get a pay-rise, regardless of how well they’ve worked through the year. Needless to say, the motivation levels have fallen through the floor.

All this is being marketed as an improvement on efficiency, alongside providing financial savings for the company.  What they don’t seem to have realised is that there’s also been a significant hike in number of people now wanting Out, and looking any/elsewhere for a new job. I wonder what the savings will be when you add in all the new recruitment and training costs?


Post-Holiday Fitness

Once we come back from our break, one of my plans is (yet again) to get back to going to the gym. Yeah yeah, I know, you’ve heard it all before.

Over the last couple of months, while the intention to go has been there, getting round to it has been another thing entirely.

The difference between now and January is that I now want to go – and know I really should be going – it’s just that getting the time to go has been lacking, with house work, work work, and work on dealing with hindrances like [insert epic sweary phrase here] accountants who go bankrupt.

But things should now be calming down a bit more, so with luck I’ll be able to get back into going again.

I need to really – I don’t want to keep on pissing money up the wall when it comes to the gym…


Jade Goody

So, Jade Goody died today. And already all the weasels are coming out of the woodwork (I know, it’s a mixed metaphor – live with it) with their tributes and homilies.  Of course, high up in the order is good old Gordon Brown, who wouldn’t be saying anything at all if she weren’t a reality TV “star”. (which means, “star” in the loosest possible sense of the word)  In fact, if she hadn’t died of cancer, the two-faced toss-pot would probably prefer to be deriding her as all that’s bad with the world™, a single mother with no education or job prospects.

Now, I have no problem with the fact that Goody’s cancer has resulted in a surge in the number of people getting scans for cancer – that’s nothing but good in my book.

But seeing all the tributes about how she was such an inspiration, such a great person (and even in one case “a Princess Diana from the wrong side of the tracks” – purlease!) really just makes me want to vomit.

The media seems to have forgotten that Jade Goody came to their attention as part of Big Brother (Series 3, I think) where she was villified for being

  • fugly
  • pig-thick
  • unpleasant

She also then went on to show all these character traits again in Celebrity Big Brother where she was – let’s not forget – the epicentre of the racism complaints.

Yet somehow contracting cancer nullifies all these bad points, and turns the sufferer/victim into some kind of Joan of Arc figure, almost saintly in their purity, humility and beauty.

Get a fucking grip. She died. It happens every day. Sure, she was more in the public eye. But think on this – if someone like Margaret Thatcher were to die of cancer, would they instantly be converted to sainthood too?


Yesterday

Well, as it turns out, the problem with the cooker was actually an issue with the gas supply stuff outside the house – the low-pressure thingy had been triggered somehow, and was doing exactly what it was supposed to do.

Luckily, the cooker engineer who came out was lovely, and willing to talk to the guy who had done the original install (who also knew we were more than slightly fucked off by the entire thing) so between them they got it sorted out. Even better, because it was something we didn’t know about – allbeit had looked at, when it looked fine – we didn’t get charged anything for them fixing the problem.

And as well as now having a working cooker again – for which happy, happy day – we’ve also managed to get a number of jobs done round the house.

  • Kitchen wall tiles are now all grouted in.  (Floor tiles will be done on Monday, most likely)
  • Appointment has been made with an accountant to see what’s going to happen.
  • I’ve started painting the wooden fence panels. Six down, ninety-one to go.
  • We’ve started laying a bundle of weed-proof membrane over bits of the veg patch, for work over the next few weeks
  • The fruit trees have had a trim/prune
  • We’ve done a bundle of other stuff too. I just can’t remember it right now.

So yes, while we’re not “on holiday” as such, it’s looking like it’ll be fairly productive and get a bundle of outstanding jobs out the way. (Which will, of course, just make room for other jobs instead)


Comedian Blasphemy

If you listen to the media, the writing/acting partnership of James Corden and Matt Horne is some kind of comedy genius.

For once – and I know this’ll come as a shock to regular readers – I disagree. For me, I just don’t find their stuff to be even vaguely amusing, let alone funny.

Gavin and Stacey? Not funny. Not an awful series, but really not funny.

Horne and Corden? Not even in the same country as funny. I’m not sure it’s even in the same continent as funny.

Appearances on Comic Relief? Frankly, I’ve had funnier enemas. Although they produced a similar amount of shit.

And their new film, Lesbian Vampire Killers? I’ll pass, thanks.

I know, in theory there’s the response of “Well, think you can do something better?”. And the answer is no, I don’t really think I can do anything better than their stuff. But the thing is, I don’t claim to be a writer of comedy anyway. If I did, I’d try to have something to show as an example of “this is better”. But I don’t, so I won’t.


Inauspicious Starts

So, the week off work begins with…

  • Engineer visit to find out what’s wrong with the bastard cooker
  • A letter from my cretinous ex-accountant’s Official Receiver, basically stating I’ve got fuck-all chance of getting any money back.  (Which can be summarised thus : Assets : £5,000. Debts : £150,000. Chances : Fuck All)
  • Herself grouting tiles
  • Yours Truly painting/creosoting fence panels. There’s only 100 of ’em to do…

Still, at least I’m not back in work for a while now.  Silver linings, clouds, and all that guff.


Changing Plans

In the last week, we’ve had the following stuff at the house…

  • Last Friday – water leak under the sink  (fixed that evening) – kitchen water completely off
  • Weekend – doing all the floor tiles
  • Monday – another (different) water leak under the sink – water turned completely off
  • Tuesday – water leak fixed
  • Wednesday – Power cut off, due to EDF doing work on power supply in village
  • Wednesday – No gas going to brand new gas cooker. Nothing at all – both bottles are full, no kinks in the pipe, nothing blocked. Auto-shutoff on the cooker seems to be OK. But there’s no gas.
  • Thursday – still no gas to cooker
  • Friday – ditto

There’s an engineer visit booked for tomorrow to check the cooker.

So all told, over this week my sense of humour has utterly failed, which is never a good sign.

As a result, and with plenty of other outstanding jobs to do, we’ve taken the decision to move our break from next week to [some other time] (although we’re as yet undecided to when) and we’ll spend the week at home instead, sorting out some of the outstanding stuff, and taking time out that way instead.

Luckily the people at Scottish Country Cottages have been lovely, and allowed us to change the booking at very short notice – we explained the situation, and they’ve been very understanding.

In the current situation I can’t deny, I’m actually happier to not be going – I wasn’t massively looking forward to the drive, and I think we’d both be focussing on what was happening at home, plus what we could be doing at home instead of being up in Scotland. That happened two years ago, and was the final point for us coming home early from Devon.

So we’re at home instead of in Scotland. There’s still pre-written posts to come during the week, but I’ll be adding in random stuff too. Probably.


FAIL

Shit (boring, dull, utterly pointless) day, followed by terminal sense-of-humour failure.

Back tomorrow.


Fred Goodwin, RBS, and that Pension

I know I’m going against the flow here (now there’s a shock) but I have to say, I really don’t understand the current media (and public) loathing of Sir Fred Goodwin, and his immense pension .

Now first of all, personally I think that getting a pension of near-as-dammit three-quarters of a million quid per year is utterly fucking obscene in the first place. (And particularly when I look at it in the context of “that pension for one year is three times the amount of our sodding mortgage“) But at the same time I realise that payscales are pretty much utterly fucking obscene when it comes to chairmen of multinationals etc. anyway.

In Goodwin’s case, I also kind of understand that people are pissed off that he’s getting paid that much for what he did.

However, from the corporate perspective I can fully understand that he was worth that much to RBS as a chairman.

After all, he managed and steered the bank during its growth phase, to the point where RBS bought up NatWest and Ulster bank (among others) as part of its expansion plans. Under his leadership RBS went from being a little provincial bank to being one of the world’s top five banks. And he was paid in bonuses and salary for that growth.

Then when the bottom fell out of the market, and it was shown what arrogant twats the banks had been, he managed to get the government to buy up a massive share of the bank, thus protecting it from going bust.  I’m sure that having managed both of those things, the board of RBS figured he was absolutely worth what they paid him as a severance and pension package.

The fact that the Government then failed utterly to understand what Goodwin’s severance deal and pension would be is actually more of a sign that the Ministers and MPs involved were totally, utterly, criminally clueless – after all, it looks like he could’ve been fired with “just” a 12-month-salary payment, instead of the severance deal.

As I see it, it’s those Government Ministers and MPs we should be angry with for allowing the Goodwin deal to go through, rather than with Goodwin himself for doing what any corporate multinational chairmen is paid to do – protect and build the company.


Ireland vs. Wales

I think it’s fair to say that it’s common knowledge that today is St Patricks Day .

In the staff canteen at work, today’s special is a Welsh Breakfast.

So of course, I just had to ask, and get my suspicions confirmed.

Yes, some slack twat at the catering company that supplies/staffs the canteen has decided that St Patrick is – um – Welsh.

You just couldn’t make it up, could you?

(Added : Just to say, it’s been pointed out that St Patrick was quite possibly born in Wales. But I’m not going to let that get in the way of a good shaking-head post.)


Updating Company Details

Following on from the fun last week where my accountant got himself declared bankrupt (fucker) I had to get the registered office for my company moved and re-registered with Companies House as soon as possible.

In light of that, I downloaded the necessary form from their website, printed it out, filled it in, and posted it off.

Checking today, the registered office change has been processed, and is part of their online record for my company.

I have to say, I’m impressed with the efficiency. I’ve said about it before, but Companies House really do tend to be disturbingly efficient – particularly when you realise they’re a branch of Government. It’s most unnatural – yet strangely reassuring.


Meetings

In my current job, I feel DiamondGeezer‘s pain about meetings at inopportune times.

Not today – thank the Lord – but in the last six months I’ve been involved in more pointless and dire meetings than I had in the previous two years. Total nightmare – I just don’t understand the need to have meetings about meetings about something that might be discussed in a meeting at some point.

Meetings at that level always just strike me as work-creation – and/or blame avoidance tactics, so anyone can point the finger and say “Well it wasn’t me who made the decision”.  I prefer a company that just sits down, has a think, makes the decisions, and sticks to them.


Quiet, and head down

It’s been one of those quiet days today – well, on D4D™, anyway.

Within work, I’ve had my head down, fixing a bundle of bugs on the latest thing I’ve been writing. Nothing world-ending, but still stuff that needed fixing.

Most of the problems came about because on occasion I’m a total flange, and screwed up some of the logic between Phase 1 and Phase 2 of the project. In short, the logic in certain pages has become so convoluted that I don’t really think it qualifies as logic any more.

In others it was more just that requirements changed, and I forgot to update things in accordance with those requirements. Or kind of updated them, but not entirely.

Still, finding these things is exactly what testing is for…


Tiled

Excuse the braindump waffle, but I’m tired…

Anyway, the kitchen is now completely tiled. Herself has done a fantastic job with the tiling itsef, and I’ve done what I can with the tile-cutter (something I’m actually good at) and with mixing the tile adhesive.

We’ve still got the grouting to do, of course, but at least we’ve got the majority of the work done now. The only bits that remain are the verdammt grouting, and then having all the kitchen unit doors replaced (which will now happen after our week’s holiday) but when that’s all sorted, the kitchen should be done. And a happy day that’ll be.


A Weekend On The Tiles

During the week, Herself has finished off tiling the walls in the redone kitchen – and bloody good they look too.

It’s taken longer than expected (and there’s still all the grouting to do) mainly because I don’t think either of us had really understood the sheer scope of the project. There’s one hell of a lot of tiles, and some decidedly awkward bits – not least the window-sill, and the wall where the sink is.

But it all looks fantastic – and once it’s done, I’m almost certain there’ll be a couple of photos put up here. Don’t hold your breath though, it won’t be ’til April…

In the meantime, this weekend will be spent doing the floor tiles. Still a big job – the tiles are the same beasts we’ve used in just about all the other rooms, 45cm square 10mm thick vitrified ceramic things that need a proper industrial tile-cutter. Yep, hired from HSS again – I suspect that over the length of the house project, we’d have actually been better off if we’d bought one, but there we go. That’s hindsight for you.

Still, by Monday we should be done on tiling – with the exception of the bloody grout, of course.  Just don’t expect much in the way of updates while we’re doing it.


Uncharitable 2

“It’s Comic Relief day! We’ve all got to ‘Do Something Funny For Money'”

“Tell you what. Go fall under a bus. I’ll laugh.”


Out Of Reach

In a fit of utter tubularity, I’ve (yet again) managed to leave my mobile phone at home today.

It’s no big problem – in fairness it would have been more of an issue if I’d also forgotten (again) to bring a new book to work, as I’ve finished the two currently residing in my bag. I’m not expecting any calls today, I can live without text messages, and all is good.

All that, however, doesn’t stop me from occasionally thinking “Where’s my phone?” though…


Uncharitable

*mutter*

*snarl*

Red Bastard Nose Day

*grunt*

Although it is amusing to have a charity day on Friday 13th, in my opinion.  Now if only something vile could befall those who come in to work in fancy dress.

“Smile! It’s for Charideeeeeeeeee”

“Fuck off”


Scalzi on Uwe Boll

via his blog “Whatever“, I got to John Scalzi’s column on AMC about why films based on video games are always abysmal.

As he says, “The answer is not just ‘Because Uwe Boll makes them’ although truthfully that is a large part of the answer.”

Scalzi sums it up really in one paragraph.

This was a nice set-up for Boll, since he’s been able to make a nice living playing filmmaker. It wasn’t nice for us, because Uwe Boll makes movies like monkeys drive trucks. Through Boll, the world is saddled with flicks like House of the Dead, Alone in the Dark and Bloodrayne, which all make you want to bleed from the eyeballs.


Priorities

Yesterday, wasn’t it interesting how the shooting of ten people in Alabama in the USA suddenly stopped being mentioned once the news of the shooting of fifteen people in Winnenden, Germany started to break?

It was as though the media decided that people wouldn’t want to know about both shootings, so the nearest and/or most recent one took precedence, and the other one could just kind of fall off the news cycle.


A Good Start (pt. 2)

Oh, and just to top things off…

  • The animals were a pain in the arse this morning. I’m seriously considering using aversion therapy on them – i.e. cause them pain, so they stop doing the things that are truly annoying. I won’t, but dear God it’s tempting…
  • Getting in to work early in order to get stuff done (and because I was awake an hour earlier than expected, due to the previous list item) it turned out that the entire IT department had no power. (There’d been a power cut at some ungodly hour this morning, and while most things were OK – including the server room- a couple of departments were knackered ’til people got in)
  • The power was finally restored an hour later, by dint of having unplugged everything in the department, re-flicked the circuit breaker, and restoring everything desk by desk.
  • We’re doing the mortgage application thing this afternoon/evening.

So yes, so far today is not going down as one of the better ones…


A Good Start

It’s obviously the month for bankruptcies and liquidations. Following on from my post the other day about a company I’d worked with going into Liquidation, I got a letter in the mail yesterday to say that my fucking accountant has filed for Bankruptcy, and is no longer part of TaxAssist.

I don’t quite understand how an accountant – someone who’s supposed to be good with money, and at least understands what the hell is going on – can go bankrupt, but that appears to be the situation. Even better, I’ve been paying through the year for my tax returns to be done – and now, just when they’re going to want doing, the fucker’s disappeared.

So yes, I’m a creditor of the accountant – I’ve paid about £6-700 all told (I need to check the sums) for him to do both personal and business tax returns – and I fully expect to get back a grand total of sod-all.

Today I need to talk to

  1. Companies House (to change the company’s registered address away from the accountant – another service I paid for)
  2. Inland Revenue
  3. The Bank

And that’s just for starters.

It’s going to be an utter fucker of a day, I suspect…


Planned Attacks

I’m utterly unsurprised by the story today on the BBC about a chimp in a German zoo that has been found to plan it’s stone-throwing attacks on zoo visitors.

One of my memories from [many moons ago] was visiting Twycross Zoo in Warwickshire with my parents when I was about ten (if that). I’ve always been a fan of apes in general, so we went to see the Gorilla House, and in there one of the silverback males took an instant dislike to me. I’ve no idea why – it might’ve been my glasses giving an extra reflection, it could have been anything – but that dislike was instant, and he charged across the enclosure straight at me, bouncing off the glass with a massive thump.

Needless to say, that charge scared me shitless – you don’t think about safety glass when it happens, believe me – so we left, but went back later in the day.  And that same gorilla came straight for me again – as soon as he saw me, bang, charge.

Probably three or four years later, we went back there with my younger brother, and for the hell of it I went back to the Gorilla House. And even after that time, the self-same gorilla saw me, hated me, and charged at the glass.

Obviously that wasn’t a planned behaviour, or planned aggression and attacks in the same way as the chimp at Furuvik, but the sheer memory span, being able to pick out one face among the thousands that must’ve passed through in the meantime, that was always awesome to me.


Time Zone Redux

Following on from yesterday’s altercation with GMT and a US-based server, I’m pleased to say that today the cron job ran – as expected, and as it should have done – at midnight GMT.

And really that’s all I wanted to happen.


Day’s Business

A quick braindump of today…

  • The car passed its MOT with flying colours – no problems at all
  • The afternoon was spent in an utterly useless meeting – absolutely no relevance to anything I do, so it was a real prize all told
  • In the post the other day about Liquidation, I mis-wrote. I wasn’t worried at all about my own company’s potential for going into liquidation – that’s not going to happen unless I do something very stupid at some point in the future. The only point I wasn’t going to be ‘holier-than-thou’ about was that I can’t complain about another company not getting in the work when I haven’t been doing much for my own company either.
  • I’m working on getting more work in
  • I’m still a fuckwit when it comes to time-zones…

Daily Word Challenge

You may have noticed over the last week or so that on occasion, some of my posts have had a single word highlighted, and linked off somewhere.

I’ve been testing a silly idea out – the Daily Word Challenge (DWC). The “concept” (if it can be called that) is that every day a word is chosen, and anyone who wants to can use that word in a blogpost (or Twitter feed, or Facebook, or whatever) and then add a link/comment in DWC back to that post.

Yes, I know, it’s utterly ridiculous – but it seemed like a piece of fun.  There’s also a Twitter feed for the site, another channel for finding out the day’s word.

Give it a go, let me know what you think.


Time Zones

This will come as absolutely no surprise to many of you, but this morning I had a blinding flash of “Jesus I’m a twat”.

I’ve recently been working on a site where the server is based in the US, and I’ve been trying to sort out a regular task (a cron job, for those who know what the hell I’m whittling on about) that would run at midnight every day.

You can see where this is going already, can’t you?  Believe me, I couldn’t until this morning.

I’ve been checking in the morning to see whether the cron job (timed to run at midnight, remember) had run overnight, and each day it hadn’t run. I’ve checked the logs – nothing. I’ve checked the command syntax umpteen times, and checked how it’s running via crontab.  All fine. But the bloody thing’s not running.

However, I got a message at 7.05 this morning telling me it had tried to run.

And right then it occurred why this problem has been happening, why the script hasn’t been running at midnight.

It’s because:

  1. I’m a fuckwit
  2. The server’s in the US. Midnight in the US is (in this case) seven hours behind midnight here.

So come 7am GMT, the server runs the script at Midnight (US Server time). And all’s well.

I’ve changed it now, so that it runs at 5pm (US Server time) which is (of course) Midnight GMT.  It means things will still fuck up come BST, but I’ll change things a bit to rectify that when I get round to it.

In the meantime, well, let’s just leave it that I’m a fuckwit.


Upcoming MOT

Tomorrow the car goes in for its MOT. It should be OK – it’s already had the necessary replacement brake-pads and discs which were the main thing I knew needed dealing with.

I’ve had the car for two years now – the MOT is the anniversary sign, really (along with the insurance renewal, of course) – and in that time I’ve done some 42,000 miles in it. When I got it, it was on 56,000 (give or take) and it’s ust gone over the 98,000 mark. By the end of the month, I’ll have clocked the damn thing, courtesty of normal work mileage plus our holiday in Scotland at the end of the month.

Of course, in a perfect fit of timing, one of the full-beam bulbs blew on Friday evening – so that’s something else that can be replaced while it’ in the garage tomorrow.

And hopefully that’ll be all that needs doing in order to get the MOT Certificate.  I’m going to spend the day with my fingers crossed, just to make sure.


Quizzage

Every few months we notice that the next village along is holding a quiz, but we never get round to going.

This time, we took note of the contact number (not the easiest, when it’s in small text on the signs as you drive past) and sorted ourselves out for going.

Turns out it’s normally tables of four, so with just the two of us, we got linked up with another group to make up a table.  It was a fun evening, and let us get to know some more people from the local area – which always helps. Weirdly, the quiz turned out to be organised by the person who’s taken over Herself’s area for Avon…

Anyway, we did OK. As a team, we ended up coming second – we were tied for second place originally, but then a tie-break meant we got the extra point necessary.  We never take the quizzes overly seriously, but we enjoy them and we’ve enough useless knowledge to do fairly well on them anyway.

So all told, a decent night out. Good fun, a big bar of chocolate as a prize for coming second, and enjoyable.


Spelin Misteaks

I saw this last weekend, and just had to get the photo…

Premisis

Premisis

The quality’s not great, due to digital zoom rather than decent zoom (bloody camphones) but I think it conveys the problem pretty well.

And no, I haven’t called the estate agents/surveyors to complain about the sign.

Yet.


Liquidated

This week, I found out that the company I worked with last year in Basildon has now gone into voluntary liquidation.

I can’t say it’s been a massive surprise – when my contract there started, they insisted they’d got at least three months of work available, but it turned out to be less than a month all told. In the time I worked with them, they didn’t generate any new business – and to my knowledge they didn’t really generate any after that time either.

I can’t be too holier-than-thou on this though – as I’ve said before, my motivation over the last eighteen months or so hasn’t been good enough on generating business for my own company either. On the flip side of that though, I don’t also have the other employees, the semi-smart office, or the high-maintenance lifestyles that they had at [Company X] I have virtually no overhead, where theirs must’ve been pretty damn high.

Equally, I’ve got the skills and knowledge that [Company X] didn’t have – they didn’t have a clue about one hell of a lot of the aspects of website design, although they did have a couple of very good Flash guys.

Anyway, looking at my reactions to the news of the liquidation, I suspect that this might bring some more of my motivation to the fore – I know I don’t want to end up in that particular scenario if I can possibly help it.


Cool Tour

Now here is news of a tour I’d love to see…

Nine Inch Nails and Janes Addiction, on the same tour.  (And of course it’s already going by the nickname NIN/JA, which is cool too)


Different Perceptions

Yesterday, a man was convicted of killing a 23-month-old baby. Robert Cunningham, 23, had denied murdering Brandon Muir, who died in Dundee in March 2008 after suffering more than 40 injuries, including broken ribs and a ruptured intestine. During the trial, medical experts said the injuries had been caused by a “massive blow” to his stomach area.

Robert Cunningham was, according to the media reports, a heroin addict – and Brandon Muir’s mother was a heroin addict and prostitute. As such, one assumes that the child was listed as being on an “at risk” register with social services, and indeed had been in contact with social workers two days before his death.

In the much more famous “Baby P” case, the child had been seen over 60 times by social workers during it’s 17-month life.

So why did Baby P get so much media coverage and hysteria, and Brandon Muir received little to no coverage? (except for basic reporting of the court case)

I wonder if it’s because Baby P was in London, whereas Brandon Muir was up in Tayside, Scotland? Or would that just (again) be me being horrifically cynical?


Rationalisation

Over the last few months, I’ve decided that in some ways I’ve been spreading myself too thin – and particularly with regard to the more creative side of my life, the photography, the writing, and so on. Up ’til now I’ve had separate sites for all the bits – plus D4D™, of course.

Equally, while the photography site is currently connected (by name) to the business site, I’m not overly happy with that, or the name that came about because of the connection. To my mind it just doesn’t fit, doesn’t connect properly.

So now I’m working on bringing it all into one site, and rationalising it all a bit.

D4D™ will stay here and separate, for a number of reasons I’ve written about many times before. The company site will stay separate, because it doesn’t fit in with the “branding” of the new concept.

However, all the creative bits – primarily the writing and the photography stuff – will move to the new site.

I’m still not going to overly publicise the connection between the new site and D4D™ – I prefer to keep them as separate as possible, and don’t plan to change that separation anytime soon.

The new ‘brand’ for the creative bits also fits in with my avowed intention to get my finger out and get on with doing the stuff. I’ll no doubt write more about the plans as they come closer to happening.


Nothing But

Just out of interest, how can a certain TV music channel have a section called “Nothing But Music” that still has advert-breaks every fifteen minutes?

Or is that just me?


Rebrand

Of all the strange adverts at the moment, one I really don’t get is why Bounty kitchen towels have rebranded to “Plenty”.

I must be missing something on the brand-recognition game..


Diet Coke

At roughly this time last year, I went through the joys of completely cutting my daily intake of Diet Coke.  It was semi-successful, in that I did stop drinking it completely for about six months, but since then it’s crept back in again.

Primarily the return of it has been down to the simple fact that it’s still the only drink I actually like drinking. I don’t drink tea or coffee at all (maybe one cup of each per year) and don’t drink enough water – mainly because, even with the use of squashes, cordials etc., it just gets fucking boring. I swapped over to drinking things like Diet Sprite and/or Diet 7Up – I don’t mind them in small doses, so *shrug* – but they give me acid indigestion on a regular basis, and that’s no fun whatsoever.   Sure, I could drink milk, or something similar – but then the calorie count and fat count would belt up as well, even on semi-skimmed. There’s something like 250calories in a pint of milk, and 9.9g of fat.

As a result, the intake of Diet Coke has crept back up again. Not to the levels of old – but still more than I supposedly “should” be drinking. Even now, I know it could easily go back to what it was a year or two ago, but I don’t actually want that to happen.  I don’t deny – and never have – that it’s my one addiction, and I suspect it’ll never be cut out completely.

So I’m cutting down on it again. I doubt I’ll drop to zero again – I might do, but I doubt it – but it’ll get cut down, and I’ll replace about half to three-quarters of my intake with water. See what happens.

Maybe I should try getting to like tea again. I could more easily get back to drinking coffee, but even then my intake levels of it end up bordering on the ridiculous. And then I still like it black with sugar, so I’d also be adding to my sugar intake. (The same is true with tea, but I drink that less sweet, on the rare occasions I have it at all)

Anyway, I’m working to formulate a sane level of intake on all these things, and we’ll just see how it goes.


Cat Shaving

Today’s the day of the annual cat-shaving farce.

As per last year’s comedy, I suspect he’s going to come back looking like a poodle – and well-deserved it is too.

The entire thing is caused by his long hair. Once spring comes, the winter fur starts to come out to be replaced with the shorter summer fur – but it all gets badly tangled up into existing fur, and he ends up simply disgusting, with clumps and matted fur, almost like dreadlocks.

So off he goes to the vets for the day, to go under General Anaesthetic (the only way to safely do this job without getting bitten/scratched/assaulted) get shaved/trimmed, and then we’ll get back a significantly trimmed-down cat this evening. He’ll be in an utterly foul mood – more so than usual – and starving hungry due to not having had any food since midnight. He’s already been foul today – when he wants food and it’s not down, he just yells, and yells, and yells. That’s been from 5.30 this morning.

He knows something’s happening, but doesn’t quite know what. Well, he will now, as Herself will have delivered him to the vets for 9am.

Depending on the level of trim he receives, there will likely be photos tomorrow…


Vehicle Checks

If you’re buying a car, you’re always recommend to do a check on the car, to ensure it’s not recorded as :

  1. Stolen
  2. Still has outstanding HP payments (which could get the car repossessed)
  3. Unregistered (for example, a cut/shut job)

However, getting those checks has always been either expensive, or non-simple to do.

Now, there’s “My Text Check” – for £3 (plus network charge for the text) you can text the car registration to 83600 , and you’ll get back the report, including information on police records, etc.

And about time too…


Mortgage Motivation

Over the years, many people have told me that it’s more sensible to have a mortgage than to keep on paying rent. Rent is, supposedly “dead money” – you’re not getting anything for it (except another month living in your property of choice) and you’re just helping to pay off the landlord’s bills.

Finally, two years ago, I jumped off the bridge, and got a mortgage with Herself on this place. Since then we’ve been doing a lot of work on the place (as any vaguely regular reader of D4D™ will know) and that side of things is all going OK. Of course, the fact is that on that score rental is easier – if something needs doing, you call the landlord or letting agency, and it gets done.

For me though, while I’ll continue on with the mortgage, I’m discovering that it has a far more negative effect on me than I’d be happy with on the real long-term.

I find that the knowledge of the amount of the mortgage keeps coming back to me, that it’s kind of a mill-stone. I don’t want to lose it, I don’t want to change it – but I’m constantly aware of it.

Maybe it’s that I’m a late-starter on the entire house-buying front, that if I’d been doing this since I was twenty-seven then I’d be used to the knowledge of the debt by now. (and I’d be nearly halfway through paying it off, which would help too!)  Maybe over time the awareness of the debt faades a bit. I don’t know – I’ve only been doing this for two years, after all.

I don’t want to have the mortgage for the full term of it – the plan has always been to overpay whereever possible, and by as much as possible within the terms of the mortgage, although over the first two years we haven’t been able to do that at all (mainly due to me being a slack-ass, and not doing the necessary extra work through the aforementioned lack of motivation) but the intention is still there for the next mortgage period.

And that’s the balance I need to find, too – between the awareness of this (to me) sodding huge millstone of debt and the desire to reduce it as much as possible.

After all, there’s no money more “dead” than the interest I’m/we’re paying to the fucking bank. Paying back 2½ times the amount borrowed? That’s “dead money” indeed.


Charlie Brooker on Politicians

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – Charlie Brooker is a god.

This time, he’s put in writing what a lot of people are (or at least should be) thinking about politicians.

A “summer of rage” indeed. Let’s hope.


DIY (Again)

Call me sensitive, portray me as a geek with no practical skills, whatever – but I really fucking hate DIY.

This weekend’s effort has been to put on the new doors for all the kitchen cupboards – supposedly an easy job, only for me it’s not. Not helped by the fact that we never seem to have the right tools for the job – this one involved needing to get a new drill bit, because for some reason all our 5mm drill bits have disappeared – which drives me completely crackers, and really gets to me.

The problem with the cupboard doors was that – of fucking course – the holes for the hinges aren’t in the same place as they are on the old doors. Which means either a) drilling new holes in the doors (risky) or b) drilling and sorting new holes in the units. We’ve opted for b), as a) is decidedly dodgy where my lack-of-talent is concerned.  Only even that is too complex for me, so it all becomes stressful and annoying.

I’m aware of my limitations on these things – I’m OK with some of the basics, but I’m better as being an assistant (at best) or – far preferable – paying someone else to do the stuff I can’t do.

To me, it’s better to have work done professionally – it saves on the stress, hassle, and crap all round.


YELLOW!

Wow.  Via Smashing, I’ve come across a site even more yellow than D4D™ used to be.

You have been warned…


Hub Caps

In the last month, I’ve somehow managed to lose all four hubcaps from my car. I know one went when I had the blowout, and another one disappeared soon after.

But I’ve lost the other two in the last three days. I haven’t hit anything, gone into any significant pot-holes, haven’t heard or noticed anything of them coming off. There’s no sign of them along my route to work. They’ve just disappeared.

Fortunately, when I had the blowout I’d ordered a couple of replacements from QuickHubs, and ended up getting a set of four as that cost me the same as two individual hubcaps. So in this case it’s fortuitous, as I now need all four – I’d have been mightily narked if I’d paid for two, and now needed two more, as that would have doubled what I’d paid.

At least now all four will match.

And I’ll be attaching them with plastic cable-ties as well, so they should stay put this time round…


Time Padding

Over the last two (nearly 2½) years, I’ve been banging on about my five-year plan, and the work that’s been going into it. The project is still going on, but I think I may need to add a year to it.  That’s annoying to me – it means that I get it done by the time I turn 41 instead of 40 (and fuck me, does that really mean I’m going to be 40 in 2½ years? Shit) and thus lose some of the nice roundedness of the idea. It also means that I don’t live up to the ‘five-year’ part of the title.

The thing is, since the inception of the plan, there’ve been things going on that have delayed some of the work I planned on doing.  The house purchase – and the ongoing work on the house – has had a significant effect on some of the plans, as we’ve been doing one hell of a lot that wasn’t really in the initial plan as such.  Yes, they’re in the original set of planned tasks – but I wasn’t realistic about how long they’d take, or how much work would be involved.

So that’s one thing that’s kind of superceded other plans.

But the other one has been far sneakier, and far harder to get to grips with. It’s one I’m familiar with (and it’s mentioned in the categories up there) but that I don’t always see without some hindsight. Yes, I’m referring (of course) to Ye Olde Depression. Again.

I still don’t know if I’ve actually been fully depressed – but I do know that for the last eighteen months or so my motivation has been pretty much non-existent. The ideas have still been there, and some things have sparked some desire to work on them, but the real motivation to work just hasn’t. I’ve let things drift, or not started them at all. OK, the bits for this year are coming on, and there’s a couple that can be checked off, I still feel like I’m lagging behind.

I’m working on it – things this year have started off OK, and the motivation appears to be on its way back – but right now I’m not sure whether to add a year to the target, or leave it as it stands for now, and just see how I do.

I suspect that for now it might be the latter plan – I’d rather do the five years and see where I am at that point, to be honest – but it’s something that’s worth thinking about as time goes on.  I’ll most likely review it come November, when there’s only two years left on the list.

But of course any ideas or suggestions are welcome in the meantime…


Writing Tips : On Being Late

One of my own favourite authors, Charles Stross has a piece today about the convoluted mechanics behind writing sets of novels – talking about his own experiences and those of George R R Martin (whose book I freely admit I just can’t get into at all) who is apparently very late on the next installment of his epic work, and has written a blog post about it, and (as Stross says) “issued a comprehensive response to the vocal and annoying fans who think he can pull a quarter of a million words out of his ass on demand”

It all makes for interesting reading – I must admit, I’d never really thought about the intricacies of writing these epic novels – most likely because it’s never been likely to be the sort of thing I ever wrote – but the insight Stross gives makes it worth the effort.


Cat Flap – Reactions

Reactions to the newly installed cat flap have been varied – and in some ways, quite funny.

Psycho Cat still has significant issues with it, for reasons known only to himself – he doesn’t like going out through it, but is fine with coming back in through it. Go figure.

Personally, I suspect that he just likes it now that he has people who’ll let the little git out, and he doesn’t want to let go of that.

At the same time, Hound thinks the cat flap is great. It’s magic (in her opinion) when the cat walks through the door – but because it’s also a transparent flap we’ve found that she will sit outside and look through it so she knows what’s going on inside at the same time.

Finally, the neighbourhood cats think it’s great – they’ve got a new place to visit, and they do so. Yesterday we had a visitation from one of them (who we call Bill – there’s two cats, Bob and Bill – no good reason, just seems to work) and he slept the entire day on our bed. Psycho Cat wasn’t amused by this, and Hound did absolutely sod all – she’s a shit guard dog.

With luck, Psycho Cat will soon decide to go out the bloody flap as well as come in through it – and then we’ll be happy.


New Cooker

Today we’re getting the new cooker installed, and finally getting rid of the old shitty electric one.

We’ve opted for a gas cooker, as it’s infinitely preferable to electric. But because there’s no gas supply to the village at all, it means it’ll be fired using LPG bottles outside the house. We’ll see about the efficiency of it, but by all accounts it should work out pretty well.

It’s going to be interesting though – normally Hound would go in the car while this kind of work’s going on, but today my car’s in the garage, getting the brakes checked. At the last service I was told they’d need doing before the MOT comes up – and that’s due in the next couple of weeks as well, so it’s best to get it all out the way before the MOT.

So I’m not quite sure yet what I’ll do with Hound, but I’m sure we’ll work something out.


At Home

Today, there’s supposed to be two places that I’m at. Only I’m not actually at either of them.

First of all, there’s the usual – I’m supposed to be at work.

Secondly, I’m supposed to be on a course in London betwen now and Wednesday. A course that’s utterly irrelevant to what I do, and that I don’t even understand (and no-one at work has been able to explain) why it’s deemed necessary to be on it.

The other part of it for the course is that, due to it being in London, I’m supposed to be staying in a hotel – I don’t fancy leaving home at 5.30am in order to get the train down there to be at the course for 9am, nor leaving at 6ish and not getting home ’til 8.30 or 9pm. Only work hasn’t been able to confirm that I’d be paid back for my expenses on staying in a hotel. Nothing from HR, from my department, or the manager. “Probably” was about the closest they’d come to an answer.

So in short, fuck that. I’ve got better things to do with my life that screwing about with possibly getting paid back for staying in a hotel in order to take part in a useless course with no relevance whatsoever to my work.

As for normal work – for once I got up and simply couldn’t be chuffed to go in. It’s not often I have days like that – but today is definitely one of them.


Transform

via Chromasia, I found Zack Arias‘ piece called “Edit: Transform“.

It’s awesome.

There’s just no other word for it. Spend six minutes of your life watching the video. It’s worth it.


DIY

I may have mentioned before, I really hate DIY – I’m not massively practical at the best of times, and it all comes to a head when it comes to All Things DIY.

This weekend, it’s been a bit of painting (which I don’t mind in general) and also dealing with skirting boards all round the new kitchen bits. That’s included cutting loads of mitre joints (the ones where each side is a 45° angle) which always bring out my failings in spectacular style. Some of it is down to not having the right equipment (something else which drives me cackers) but even the simple practicality and logic for cutting these damn corners drives me crackers.

We had already got a mitre-block for guiding the saw at the correct angles – but it’s not big enough to handle the skirting boards, so yesterday I ended up going off and getting another mitre thing specifically for larger items like skirting-boards. It’s made the final bits today a lot easier – although I’ve also carved chunks out of the block itself, due to the fact I’m also shit at using a saw in a straight line. We’ve got some other mitre stuff do in the next few weeks, so I’ll probably organise getting something else in place for those.

Still, the skirting boards are done now – and all told the job’s not too bad. In that way, it’s fairly satisfactory – but I still find that for the most part, DIY is infinitely less fun than most people make it out to be.


Dark/Black Blood

Over the last few years I’ve become a fan of two books by John Meaney, Bone Song and Dark Blood – so I was pretty eager to get what Amazon described as the new book by John Meaney, Black Blood.

I received it yesterday from Amazon, and it turns out that actually Black Blood is the US title for Dark Blood. (Yes, perhaps I should’ve looked on the author’s site – but I didn’t. Mea culpa on that point at least)

I’ve sorted out returning it to Amazon, and they haven’t objected – but all the same, you’d think that there could be some mention of it on the Amazon site, wouldn’t you?

This is the second time I’ve been bitten by this in the last couple of years – the first instance was Richard Morgan’s “Black Man”, which is titled “Thirteen” in the US. Again, no mention of this is made (still) on the Amazon site either.

Personally, I don’t understand the need for re-titling the book, either. I can (kind of) see it for “Black Man”, but that understanding goes out the window when “Dark Blood” is renamed to “Black Blood”.


Photo Opportunities

A few days ago, a friend made me aware of a burned-out van out in the wilds of Norfolk (and fortuitously close to where I’m currently working) which was of interest to me for some photo ideas.

I was going to go over there this weekend, but changed plans this morning, loaded the camera into the car along with the satnav (in order to find the bloody place at all) and took the opportunity while it was there – the local council usually being vaguely efficient when it comes to vehicle removal.

The road that it’s on is – interesting, I think it’s fair to say. Distinctly rural, single-track, and covered in mud for the first mile, deep ditches on either side – I’m just glad I wasn’t going with the initial evening/night-shots plan. (Now I know where it is, I might give that a go next week if it’s still there)

All told, I’m quite pleased with the photos I’ve managed to get – or at least, I’m pleased with how they looked through the lens, and on the screen on the back of the camera. I’ll only get the chance to see them on the big monitor tonight, and see what I think then.


Clunk Click Every Trip

I still find it amazing that a significant number of people still don’t bother putting their seatbelts on when driving.

As a result, Norfolk police are this week having a campaign to catch people driving without seatbelts , which has to be a good thing. According to the story, officers expect to issue hundreds of tickets over the next seven days. (I wonder if they’ll also be checking for tosspots still using mobile phones while driving – hope so!)

Last year 2,111 people were fined for not wearing a seatbelt in Norfolk. The last time Norfolk held a special campaign, the number fined leapt to 440 over a two-week period.

I’ve always worn a seatbelt, and to be honest can’t imagine not doing so. But I see people doing so every day – or pulling away from a junction, or carpark, or whatever, and then pulling the seatbelt across them while driving along. I’d love to see some of those pillocks stopped and fined, I must admit.

Interestingly, my dad’s now had two driving accidents, one either side of the seatbelt law.

In the first, he hit black ice and rolled the car down a slope. He’s always said that in that case if he’d been wearing a seatbelt, he’d have been trapped in the car and unable to get out. As it was, he walked away with a bundle of bruises.

In the second, he was hit head-on by an idiot Frenchman driving round a blind corner on the wrong side of the road. In that one, he was wearing the seatbelt (by then it was law) and says that if he hadn’t been wearing it, he’d have gone through the windscreen and probably died.

Not that any of that is an excuse for not wearing seatbelts, of course.


Kitchen Doors

You’d think we’d have learned after the last farce with B&Q about kitchen doors, but no – Herself found the ones we liked, and ordered them from Ballsup and Quit. And the delivery was due today…

Oh dear, oh lord, oh what a to-do. I don’t know quite how to break it to you, gentle reader – so brace yourself.

B&Q delivered everything. On time. And it all appears to be correct – even the kitchen worktops. My gob has never been so smacked.

It looks like (in fairness to them) B&Q have sorted themselves out in the intervening time, and now everything is bar-coded, and checked in a hand-held terminal before it comes off the truck. If there’s stuff missing, the terminal won’t let them make the delivery.

It makes the delivery a lot slower – they were sodding about on the truck for a good twenty minutes before anything came off it at all – but it means we’ve got everything, and it’s all ready to go.

So fair’s fair. In this case, B&Q has definitely improved, and upped it’s game. Despite myself, I’m impressed.


Ring Main

Yesterday, we had the electrician out again to the house to install some lights and new plug sockets in the kitchen.

As part of that work, he discovered that the house’s ring-main for the electrics was actually not a ring-main at all, in that it wasn’t a complete circle.

I don’t profess to understand the details of ring-mains etc. – that’s why we have an electrician to do these things – but it’s also something that the previous electrician we had really should have checked at the same time we had all the other work done. Only he didn’t, because he was an idiotic cock-end.

So we’ve not had a proper ring-main for the last two years. Fortunately we don’t run anything that could’ve buggered the wiring or caused a problem – but all the same, the house is noticeably safer on that score now than it was on Monday, for example.

We’ve had a mixture of luck with electricians – the guy we now use is fantastic, and was recommended by the builder. The previous bunch of clowns we used were a nightmare – we’ve since found a number of things that should’ve been done when they were here, but that weren’t.

And as always, it’s worth noting that we tell lots of people about the electricians to avoid, then recommend the one we like…


Spam Honesty

Now there’s a title I never thought I’d write.

All the same, I can only be impressed at a spam comment received recently here, whose content read…

Hello! It’s spamer’s programm. Please delete this topic to let me know, what this forum/guestbook is moderated!!!

Now fair enough, it’s about as literate as most spam emails, but at least it was working exactly as advertised.


Analytics

Damn, knew I’d forgotten something with all the redesign stuff that’s been going on here.  And I’ve just discovered what that something was.

Google Analytics.

So for the last four days, according to Analytics no-one had visited D4D™ at all.  Ooops.

It’s all fixed now – but all the same, a pain in the backside.


Goals

Yesterday, in a comment on the post about colour-schemes for D4D™, Gordon wrote :

Step back a minute.

Why do you have this blog? What do YOU want from it?

Which seemed like a pretty good starting point for a post, to be honest.

1. Why do you have this blog?

There’s a number of reasons, but the main one will always come out as “Because I wanted to see if I could“. Over the years, I’ve had many many projects that I’ve started up, got about 75-80% of the way through, or even all the way to launch, and then got bored and not completed them. (or not continued putting energy into them) There was always something new to try, something else to work on.

D4D™ was a way to combat that. It was an ongoing project, sure – but it’s been one I’ve kept on with now for six-and-a-bit years. Maybe it’ll fade out at some point – the odds are that it will – but it’s kept going, kept me going, and I haven’t just faded off with it.  Sure, it’s nowhere even close to what I envisioned when I started – them’s the breaks – but it’s kept on happening.

Also, it was a way to get me back into regular writing. Not necessarily about anything – even a quick trawl through the archives will easily show there’s no consistent theme to any of this rubbish – but to be posting at least one piece per day, every day. Years back I’d written two book-length stories as well as an absolute shed-load of shorter/smaller stuff (some of which is utterly cringeworthy now, but some of it still works to one degree or other) but they were fuelled by depression and a need for catharsis on certain experiences. Between then – about 1995 or so – and 2002 when D4D™ came on the scene, I hadn’t written a damn thing. Since then, some 750,000 words – and it must be coming up to the 800,000 mark by now – have gone through D4D™.

Of course, at some point I want to be doing more “proper” writing, as I’ve mentioned before. So at that point, D4D™ will either mutate once more, or get put on hold. Or some weird bastard-child intersection of those two things. Or something else entirely.

2. What do YOU want from it?

Now that one’s a bit harder. I don’t really know what I want from D4D™ – other than to be a braindump space, where I can splurge out some of the things and thoughts that keep on happening. It’s a healthy venting spot for my more cynical moments, but it’s bugger-all use for the more creative stuff I want to be working on.

I suppose I could add a different section to D4D™ now that a lot of the other stuff has gone The Way Of The Bin, which deals with the bigger stuff, or even get back to doing a “Page” for a longer piece every so often. (That’s what I would do with the old rants etc. anyway, should they ever make a comeback) Or I could just have a different site for that writing stuff. I don’t know yet.

So I suppose what I want from D4D™ is to maintain a status quo, to allow me to keep on writing – with no aim of becoming BWABD (Blog With A Book Deal) or anything other than just that general dumping ground for whatever’s going on in my brain at the moment. Or at least whatever’s going on in my brain that is a) not related to other sites/writing and b) not related to the multitudinous other business ideas etc that are forever battering round the brain cells.

In fact, I think that’s what the aim will be for now – to let the site keep on going, to keep it doing the same kind of things it has for the last six years.

Of course, that means that I’ve got an open hand when it comes to colour schemes etc. – but for now that’s going to stay the same too, and the yellow will remain as a reminder of the reasons why D4D™ came into being at all…


Yeah, different again

OK, so I’ve made a decision following on from a couple of posts over the weekend re style/colouration etc.

And yes, before anyone chimes in with it, this is one of the benefits with using WordPress – shedloads of templates that are available and lovely.

With some hindsight, there were some things I wasn’t happy about with the FluidYellowBlack (FYB) template, although it fitted fine under “that’ll do”. And having re-looked on the dev version of D4D, and trying out a different template instead of FYB, I found myself liking it more and more.

So three days after relaunch/redesign 1, welcome to the new redesign 2. Not so much a redesign as a different template, in fairness – but I’m pretty sure I prefer this one, all things considered.

No, it still doesn’t have much of a connection to the full D4D name – but this one feels more like me, for some reason I haven’t yet ascertained.

Enjoy.


Fatclap

When we got the new back door last week, one of the reasons was to enable us to have a cat-flap again. We had one back in Bracknell, but since moving to Norfolk we haven’t had a catflap at all.

This has meant that Psycho Cat sees us more as skivvies or slaves, who will get up at any time of the night in order to let the little sod out. In fairness, this usually means somewhere around 6 – 6.30 am, which isn’t too bad.  However, it’s not been unknown for it to be 3am, or 4am. Which is too bad.

When he’s wanted to go out, the cat has scratched on a chair in the bedroom, which is a woven-willow thing. It’s a noise that is just about guaranteed to wake me up, and he bloody well knows it.

Now, though, we’re finally back to having a catflap. Hindsight says that if we were to ever do this again, replacing the back door with one that’s cat-flap equipped would be a priority task, but well, it wasn’t. Those are, as they say, the breaks. Of course, in the two and a half years we’ve been up here now, Psycho Cat is feigning amnesia about how to operate a catflap.

He’ll learn. He’s not got any other options. We’re not letting him out the front door, or opening the back door for him. He will go through the sodding catflap, if it’s the last thing we do.

In fairness, he’s learning. When he was puking, he went out (and came back in) through it fine. I still had to push him out the first time (and got bitten for my troubles) but after that he seemed to be better about the entire thing.


Vomitorious

At 4.30 this morning, I got woken up by the notable vibrations of the cat being sick on the bed.

And then at 5.30.

And at 6.30.

I suspect that this is not an auspicious start to the week – although in some ways whatever else happens can only be an improvement.

There’s something quite spectacular about the method a cat uses for puking though – it’s pretty much a whole-body effort, with the entire torso of the cat heaving backwards and forwards before the stomach contents are expelled. Those efforts are enough to wake me up.

I don’t know what’s caused the cat to be so ill. On previous form, he’ll now sleep through the day (not that that’s any different to usual) and be back to normal tonight.

On the other hand, I’ll be shambling around for most of the day, having had a disturbed night and clearing up (all-told) six piles of stinking cat-puke.


Colour Scheme

Following on from a conversation via Twitter on Friday, I’m wondering about the colour-scheme and design here. I know, go through a redesign and migration (and organisation) and suddenly I want to do another one. Live with it.

The fact is, it took me ages to find a template with a significant dollop of yellow in it – obviously yellow isn’t all that popular when it comes to designs.

Those with long memories will know that D4D™ was initially called “Destruction For Dummies” rather than “Dummies for Destruction”, and the initial design (if I can call it that) was based on the “For Dummies” range of books. Then I got that ‘cease and desist’ email from Wileys telling me that “[Anything] For Dummies” was part of their trademark. So the name changed (but stayed as D4D) and here I’ve been since. And the yellow’s stayed too.

Of course, with the new template I don’t need to have the rubbish with the colour switcher. But I do wonder whether I should screw about even more, and possibly change the appearance of D4D™ beyond all recognition from the old version.

I don’t know yet. We’ll see.

And of course if you’ve got any views, let me know in the comments, yeah?


Missing Pages

As part of D4D moving hosts, I haven’t yet copied over the non-blog pages. In truth, I don’t kow that I will do.  A lot of the D4D site consists/ed of pages that were no longer maintained or used any more, and were just taking up space.

I don’t know whether any of the pages were massively in use (Yes, I should’ve done a proper check before just removing them, but well, I didn’t) but I’ll keep an eye on the site error logs and see whether it’s worth copying any of it over.

Time will tell, I know – but for now there’s just going to be the main blog part here, and then from there we’ll see how it goes.


Blogroll

As part of the redesign here, I’ve also had a quick run-through of the blog-roll over there on the right, and culled a few I no longer read, or who no longer update.

It’s interesting seeing how things change – and adding new bits and bobs to the sidebars that now exist – and keeping everything a bit more up to date.

I’m sure I’ll add in a few more over time – there’s a couple of new additions in there already – but for now it’s enough to just be up to date.


Redesign/ Relaunch

As any observant person will have spotted, the design here at D4D™ has finally been updated.

At the same time, as per posts earlier this week, I’ve also upgraded to WordPress 2.7.1, migrated the database up to the proper level(which was a pig to do right) and moved hosts.

I’m now using a US-based hosting company, so the pages may take slightly longer to load (time will tell on that score) but it means I no longer have to worry about bandwidth, storage etc.

The changes appear to have been pretty smooth so far – the random titles are in place, the big black paragraph at the top of the page will change for certain days, (today being the first) and I feel that the colour-scheme is now decent enough that I don’t need to worry about the colour-scheme widget I wrote way back in the day.

I’ve still got to amend some other bits (the word count function, for example) and fix/resurrect a lot of the links on the blogroll, but yeah, the basics are there and I’m really quite pleased with the results.


VD

So, fucking hell, it’s Valentine’s Day already.

Isn’t the year going fast?


1234567890

Supergeeky, but at the time of posting this (21:30:30 on 13th Feb 2009) the Unix timestamp reads 1234567890.


New Door/Window

After two days with no back door (it got taken out on Wednesday, and boards put up to keep it weather-tight) we’ve now got a replacement door and window.

When we moved in here, we weren’t keen on the sliding back-door (think sliding patio door, but that also tilts back from the top) but could live with it ’til the time came to replace it. There were other improvements and alterations that took precedence but now we’ve got round to the kitchen.

The door’s now changed – and it’s a massive difference.

There’s still a bundle of work to be done on the kitchen – replacement cabinet doors, worktops, and sink, new wall and floor tiles, so on and so forth. But at least the structure’s back to being intact, and the building work is complete.

Little victories, and all that guff.


B of the Bang

According to the BBC, Manchester’s “B of the Bang” sculpture outside the Manchester City stadium in East Manchester is to be quietly scrapped.

Personally, I think it’s a great pity for it to be going – I remember being there when it was first erected (hello, Google) and thinking it was fantastic, and any time I’ve gone past the stadium since, it’s still an impressive bit of work.

Yes, it’s certainly got its flaws – I’m not going to argue that for a moment – but it is/was still a spectacular piece of work. I suspect that the corner of Eastlands where it currently sits will look a lot barer once it’s gone.


Not Secure, Then

Norfolk Police said someone had broken into a secure bin near police offices in the area overnight and rifled through the files.

The box files were then left in the nearby car park. It was not believed that any paperwork was missing. The incident will be investigated.

Well, it’s not really all that sodding secure then, is it?

Gimps.


Femtocells

Is it really geeky to be interested in getting one of these as and when they’re released in the UK?

Basically, it’s an extension of the cellular (mobile) network, connected through broadband, and allowing improved mobile access in phone blackspots. Like – well – our entire house/street.

Yes, geeky as all hell, but still I can see plenty of use for it just where we live…


Child Smokers?

I think that the headline “Child smokers given cash to quit” is perhaps a little open to being interpretation.

After all, I’ve never tried to smoke a child. Mind you, I suspect that it’s rather harder than, for example, smoking a kipper.


To Upgrade, or Not

One of the current questions I keep coming back to with D4D™ is whether I should bother upgrading my WordPress install to get me back up to date.

As it is, D4D™ still runs on WP 2.1 , and the current version is 2.7 . It’s so behind the times that I know I should go through the pain of a multi-version upgrade, but I honestly don’t know if I can actually be bothered.

I’m very aware that when I moved over to WP, it was a pain – although I wouldn’t go back now, believe me – and I know that the D4D™ template has been corrupted by me to within an inch of its life.

Of course, I could do the upgrade, and put D4D™ into a WP template for a while. That’d be quite a shock to the system, wouldn’t it? If I were to go that route, I’d also be putting into place at least the basics of a re-plan of how things go on D4D™ including taking out a lot of the old sections that really aren’t looked at any more, and just a bit of a tidy up.

Oh, and a move to a new/different host. After all, why make things simple and do just one thing at a time? That’s no bloody fun at all…


Cooling Towers

Having lived near(ish) to Didcot when I grew up, and having worked a couple of times in the shadow of the towers themselves, I thought this BBC piece about Didcot power station and its cooling towers was really interesting.

It’s relevant to the entire energy, power, and pollution thing too, of course – but I can’t deny, it’s relevance to me was more about the location.

I’d love to go inside these towers one day and take photos – although from the sound of it, the photos would just be grey mist.


Mortgage Guff

It’s nearly two years now since we bought the current house, and the fixed-interest period is coming to a close. So it’s back to the grind of renewing the mortgage.

As part of that, we had a meeting last night with an IFA from the same company that sorted out the mortgage last time. We’ve also contacted another IFA who was recommended by friends, but the useless git hasn’t got back to us at all. Makes you wonder whether he actually wants the business.

Still, it’s all looking like we should be OK this time round, so we’ll see how it goes.


Semi-Green

Apparently, a town in Norfolk is to take part in a trial of a “green” oil that can be used in boilers to heat homes.

Supposedly this oil has a lower “carbon footprint” than normal fuel oil, and is thus “greener”.

However, there’s also this in the story…

The fuel being used is a biodiesel manufactured by Argent Energy, in Motherwell, Scotland, from used vegetable oil and tallow, which is blended with conventional oil by Pace Fuelcare, in King’s Lynn, Norfolk, before the company delivers it to the properties.

So this biodiesel is going to be transported from Motherwell to Kings Lynn (some 350 miles) by truck before being added to normal fuel oil, and then delivered – again by truck – to houses and schools.

All of which makes the entire ‘green’ carbon footprint of the stuff slightly more suspect than it perhaps should be…


Scolari

I’m no football fan, but even I’m utterly gobsmacked at Chelsea FC’s decision to sack Luis-Felipe Scolari after just seven months in charge.

When he was brought in as a manager, everyone seemed to be singing Scolari’s praises – and yet now he’s been dumped pretty ignominously.


Error Message

One of the things in the current workplace that drives me crackers is the total flakiness of the server/gateway that allows internet access through to the outside world.

It breaks down at least once a day, blocking everything with an “Access Denied” message. On occasion, the breakdown will be for a good couple of hours, minimum.

The only tiny silver lining on this particular cloud, though, is the even more stupid error message that comes up…

Type: content Name: Scenarios/Anti-Virus Scan Action: not-checked
Description: Error: ‘The operation completed successfully. ‘ reported by ‘F-Secure AntiVirus for MIMEsweeper’

Yes, the error is caused because “the operation completed successfully”. By inference, that means that when we have internet access, the operation is failing – so internet access is actually an error state.

Or something.


Green Bulbs

When we moved in, one of our (admittedly small) mistakes was the lights that we bought for the kitchen. There are two fittings, and each of those holds four halogen bulbs. Oops.

They’re obviously fairly power-consuming, with 4x60watt bulbs in each fitting. So we spent some time today looking at more eco-friendly low-wattage bulbs in a GU10 fitting for these light fittings. And bloody hell, they’re expensive. A normal GU10 bulb will set us back about £1.50 to £2.50, depending on where you go.

So far, the cheapest we’ve found for a green GU10 energy-saving bulb is about £7, while the normal price for them appears to be around £10 each.

So to replace the bulbs in our two kitchen light fittings is going to cost something like £60 at a minimum, and actually closer to £80-90.

I don’t mind paying a bit extra for an energy-saving bulb – although today we picked up a 100W bulb for £1, which is awesome – but to be paying 300-400% more for an energy-saving bulb than the normal GU10 bulbs means they’ve got to save one hell of a alot before they’ve paid for themselves.

I’m sure they will in the long run, but it’s a pain in the arse right now, it has to be said…


Commuting

While I’m still doing a commute of some 25 miles each way, I have to say that with the weather this week I’ve been very thankful that I’m not still working in Cambridge, and doing the 120 mile round trip each day.

Mind you, if I had been meant to be doing that, I suspect I’d have been working from home, rather than doing the journey anyway.


Building Work – Phase 2

The main dollop of building work in the kitchen is now completed – the weird wall and archway are gone, the two semi-rooms are merged together, the ceiling is replastered, and the pipes and wires are all boxed in.

Along the way, we’ve also had to get a new extractor fan/cooker hood thing – the old one had never worked since we moved in, and it turned out to have a bird’s nest in the flue pipe, at which point it all got condemned. We’ve also been able to replace the exterior PIR lights with ones that actually work, and don’t occasionally stay on all night. Oh, and the electrician has sworn (again) at the previous owner’s DIY “skills”. (in the loosest possible sense of the word)

The ropy old sliding back door is yet to be replaced, due to the fact the guy doing the work has developed a dollop of gastroenteritis, which means that sometime next week (probably) we’ll be having the builders back over for a day to take out the old door and put in a bit of replacement wall, and then we’ll have the replacement window and door installed the next day.

Herself was busy yesterday taking the old tiles off the walls in preparation for putting new ones up over the weekend. We’re leaving the floor tiles until next weekend, as (I think) the builders were scared of breaking new floor tiles when they take out the door and put in the replacement wall.

So it’s all going ahead, and we’re getting there. The kitchen looks one hell of a lot bigger now, and it’s all pretty promising really.


Safe Sex Advert

This story really should be used as an advert for safe sex.

Just something like “Going on a One night stand? This could be the result”

As I’ve said before, there’s no horror movie around that can outdo what people do to each other anyway.


Induction

This morning, nearly four months after I started [new job], I get to spend a full morning doing an induction course.

It runs from 9am to 12 noon, with no breaks, no refreshments, and 12 speakers from different departments doing a 20 minute (on average) presentation.

I can’t think of anything that’d be more fun. *cough*


Get Real

Just received this from an IT agency – nothing like short notice, I suppose…

I need a contract PHP Developer for a 3-week contract in [Deepest Darkest Essex]. The role involves building a new website for a school.

Work onsite at first but home working is also offered.

Candidates are required to interview today and it is an immediate start.

So – not overly realistic, although I suppose there might be a local developer who’s in need of immediate work…


Bye Thatcher (Unfortunately Carol, Not Maggie)

While I have no problem with Carol Thatcher being chucked off the BBC’s “One Show” (although I’d dispute it’s a “top show”) it really bugs me – yet again – that the BBC gets to be so hypocritical by reporting the story, including the offensive word, ad nauseam.

In fact, having gone years without hearing the word that the bigoted old trollbag used, I’ve now heard it no less than ten times in the last twenty-four hours.

And yes, I know I harp on about this (enough that I’ve now made it a category on here) but the hypocrisy of it really fucks me off on a regular basis.


Barmy driving

Yesterday’s snow (which has all disappeared here now, thanks to a dollop of rain last night) brought out a bundle of bizarre driving habits along with it.

Fortunately none were as dodgy as this bell-end who took his 1300cc bike up to (at least) 122mph with his son riding pillion and said “But it had started to rain and I pulled back the throttle”. Yes, it had started raining, so he sped up to twice the speed limit. Way to go, dickweed.

Yesterday I got to see several idiots though – particularly (as I said at the time) drivers of four-wheel-drive vehicles with still no idea how to handle the weather at all. There were also (as always) several people driving with foglights on (yes, it’s one of my particular bug-bears, I know) during both snow and the evening rain. Now first of all the visibility wasn’t that bad at any point yesterday that it needed foglights on – but also foglights aren’t (as these drivers seemed to think) a Magic Talisman Of Road Protection™®, so I don’t understand the mental equation that says “I think the visibility is so bad that I need to put my foglights on, but I won’t slow down and I’ll still whack along this dual-carriageway at 80+ mph“.

All told, a very strange day on the roads.

But one good thing was that because of all the media rubbish about bad weather etc., there was virtually no traffic on the way home from work – I think I made the best time yet…


Brown

I don’t care how well-trained a soldier you are, or whatever, but if you’re on your first ever skydive, and the instructor you’re strapped to has a heart attack then it’s brown-trouser time.

Simple as that.

Mind you, as my dad used to say, there are times like this where it’s just not your time to die, regardless.


Nottingham Snow

(via Mike TD)

Yet again, Nottingham shows its class in the snow. (Screengrab from the market square webcam)


Building Work

At home this week, we’ve got the builders in again. This time last year it was the bathroom getting knocked apart and now it’s the turn of the kitchen to get some replanning.

We’ve got a small (useless, space-taking) wall to be knocked down, a tiled floor to come up, a ceiling to be replastered, some pipes to be moved and/or boxed in, a new outside light to be installed, and the poxy horrid sliding backdoor (think sliding patio door, but also one that tips back from the top in order to come out) is being replaced by a window and single door. I think that’s it, but there’s probably other stuff going on as well.

All told, it means that this week is going to be slightly chaotic – and pretty dusty.

Then in a couple of weeks time we’ve got a delivery of new kitchen doors coming, along with worktop (sound familiar?) which will then get fitted and done the following week. (with luck, and assuming that the order comes through a) on time and b) correct. I’m placing no bets on either of those occurrences, let alone both)

So by the end of March we should have a redone kitchen – we’re not doing the full extension in the end, so this will be a replan that makes the place work better, but for about 1/15th of the cost…


Snowed In? No Such Luck

So apparently London is paralysed because of 3-4inches of snow, with all the buses taken off the roads, various bits of the underground being closed, and trains in the south-east being cancelled. (It’s pathetic really, when you look at the weather in Toronto, and they’re still doing fine)

Up in Norfolk, what’ve we got? Less than an inch of snow, and no-one cares. The roads are gritted (although some of the backroads are “interesting”) and there’s no real problems at all.

In fact, the biggest issue was a certain bell-end this morning in a Subaru WRX on a gritted road who wouldn’t travel at more than 25mph. The fact they were in a 4-wheel drive vehice ideally suited to the conditions (even if they had been skiddy/slippy) seemed to have passed them by completely.

And that’s the only reason I was slightly later than usual getting in to work this morning.


Poisoning the Phish

Is it just me who takes a certain amount of dark amusement from going through to these Phishing emails for bank details, and filling them in with utter rubbish?

Obviously the data I put in is nowhere even vaguely close to the true details (and I normally do it for banks/services I don’t even deal with anyway) but I firmly believe that the more you can poison the lists these spammers/Phishers work from (and thus sell on) the less valuable they are.

And that’s something that works for me. Maybe we should encourage more filling in of fake details, rather than saying “Don’t do anything”. Well, so long as you don’t install anything from those sites, of course.


Business Cards

via Gordon (in a fairly loose way)

I love the sheer inventiveness of some of the business cards in this article – there’s others I’m not as keen on, but all told it’s really interesting (at least to me) to see the ideas that some people can put into their cards.


Under 15? Not a Drop

I find it hard to understand the new government health guidelines that say under-15s shouldn’t be allowed to drink any alcohol that were released yesterday. Even if you gloss over the fact that by that age most teenagers have had at least one alcoholic drink anyway, the advice seems somewhat flawed.

Personally, I think it’s a better policy to be introduced to alcohol as part of the process of growing up. I don’t mean to the point of abuse, or a drink with every meal, but I do believe that introducing it early, not making a big deal of it, and letting it just be part of life is a better way of dealing with it.

To me, it seems that a lot of the ritual around teenage drinking etc. is because alcohol is seen as “forbidden” and “naughty” – drinking it before you’re legally supposed to is just one of those rebellion things that people go through as they grow up. But if it’s something that’s got no shock value, something that’s part of normal life, it loses the power (unless one goes to extremes, of course) to be seen as a tool of rebellion.

I could be wrong on this of course – it’s not like I’m a parent myself – but I know that growing up (all those years ago) I was allowed to try beer, wine, lager, and even vodka and whisky. I learned the taste and smell of them, as well as what I liked and didn’t like. Once I was able to go to a pub, I knew what I could order, and whether I’d like it or not.

It meant I didn’t make the really stupid mistakes when I was old enough – such as trying to drink that first illicit bottle of vodka in one go before anyone found me and made me stop – although I was still able to make plenty of other non-drink-related stupid mistakes instead…


@Media2009

I’ve written many times about the @Media conference, which is one I always look forward to and attend when I can. I missed last years because we were travelling to Ireland on the Friday of the conference, so it wasn’t worth it.

This year it’s a bit later, on the 25/26th June at the South Bank Centre, which should be fun. I’ve never been there for conferences etc. before, so it’s another new place on the list.

Early-bird tickets (Two days for £299 plus VAT) went on sale last night, and I’m already booked in for it.

Happy, happy day.


Subway +600

Is it just me that finds it slightly depressing to read that Subway plan to open up 600 new shops in the next two years? That’s something like 6 new shops a week, just under one a day. (5.75 per week, 0.82 per day, to be accurate)

Yet another franchise model comes over from the US a la Macdonalds, Starbucks and the rest.

Admittedly, I’d rather have something from a Subway than from a Macdonalds when it comes to “fast food”, and I don’t object (too much) to their food, but still, I’d rather not be seeing them on every sodding high-street, which seems to be the goal.


Weight – Accuracy

While I was at the doctors on Monday, I opted for killing multiple birds with one stone, and also got an accurate weight measurement as well as starting off a request for a referral to a nutritionist so I can get some proper advice.

Weight-wise, I was actually quite surprised – I currently tip the scales at 140Kg. (22 stone, or just over 300 pounds) I’m not happy about it, obviously – there’s some way to go on the weightloss front for sure – but it means I was just about spot-on back in September when I estimated my own weight. Admittedly I felt like I’d put more on since then, but still, that’s what I am at the moment.

It also means that I’m one stone above where I was back at the start of 2005, which is a bit depressing. Then again, it also shows that if I do sod-all, my weight remains remarkably stable. Yes, stable at “fat bastard” level, but it’s not really going up and dwon from that point.

Still, I’m going to be working on losing some of it again – particularly now that I finally seem to be starting to be able to breathe OK again without coughing my chest up – throughout this year, and we’ll just have to see how it goes.


Daftness

There are times where I really love just how daft some people can be.

Fantastic little story.


Doctorising

I forgot to say yesterday, but the final result from the visit to the local GP on Monday was that I’m now on a weeks supply of 500mg Amoxicillin, taken three times a day.

To me that’s pretty much “Well there’s something wrong with you, but we don’t know what the shit it is, so we’ll whack it with antibiotics”. Fortunately, I don’t go to the doctors often enough to be overdosed on antibiotics, or even really getting resistant to any of them, so with luck it’ll help in this case.

At least the GP realised that it’s something I (finally) saw as being worth visiting them for though – he knows I don’t like and don’t trust GPs anyway, so the fact I’d gone to see him at all was worthy of note.

Mind you, for all the information, thought and incisive diagnosis I received, they might as well have said “it’s a virus, sod off”. And as Daisy said to me, “Virus” is just Latin for “We don’t know what the fuck it is”


Writing Plans

As I’ve written before, one of my plans for this year is to get some more writing done. I’m working on it, and there’s still a lot of the year to go, so we’ll see how things work out.

However, I’ve also been thinking about getting some impetus towards year-end, where I can both learn a bit more about my preferred writing areas, and (hopefully) get some feedback on ideas that I’ll have written – or at the bare minimum, have outlined and started – by that time.

In that light, and because I’ve known about them for years, I’ve signed up for a course through the Arvon Foundation, which I’m already really looking forward to.

It’s a cost of nearly £600 for the week, but that includes all food, board etc., but I think it’ll be an interesting departure, and something cool to do. Who knows, if it works out well, I might even go on more of them in 2010…


Kebabs != Healthy

Now, hands up, who on this planet ever thought a kebab might be a healthy food?

No-one? Thought so.

So how the hell does this qualify as news anywhere on the planet, let alone on the BBC?

On a tangent, however, I do find it quite interesting/surprising that (to quote from the story) :

Six kebabs were found to include pork when it had not been declared as an ingredient. Two of the six were described as Halal – food or drink permitted for Muslims, which must not contain pork.


Remembering the Holocaust

In view of it being Holocaust Remembrance Day, the BBC has had a couple of stories/articles up about Auschwitz and its future. (I’ve also changed my desktop at work for the day to this stunning photo of the main entrance gate which has had a couple of questions already.)

The first was a debate on whether Auschwitz should be maintained as a reminder of what happened, or whether it should be allowed to fade away. There’s also a set of photos of Auschwitz then and now.

Personally, I think that Auschwitz – and other similar camps, where possible – should be maintained, and used as a vivid reminder of the Holocaust, and what happened in the death camps. Too many people now don’t know what happened, and it’s “just ancient history”. Now, we don’t have any real field of reference, we simply can’t imagine the sheer number of people who died in these places. We can’t comprehend a camp where 1.1million people were executed.

I didn’t lose any family members in the Holocaust, and nor (to my current knowledge) did anyone else I know. My grandparents weren’t involved with the liberation of the camps, so I have no personal linkage to them. But regardless of that, I firmly believe that some things should never be forgotten.


New Tyre – How Much?

Well, much to Gordon‘s amazement, I’m not going to whinge or complain at all about the cost of the new tyre for the car.

When I replaced both front tyres back in May ’08, I paid out an extra £18 for something that ATS call “MasterService“. That (very roughly) 10% extra on my bill at the time of replacing the tyres just saved me £80odd.

You see, the tyre itself (well, from the remnants of it that were still anywhere near the wheel) still had very little wear at all- as you’d expect on a tyre that’s less than 9 months old- so I got the full 100% discount on a new tyre.

To me, that’s £18 well spent…


New Tyre

First thing this morning, I’m getting a new tyre following on from yesterday’s events.

I’ll be back in the office later, and will write more then. (Including, probably, a “How much?!?” post)


Admitting Defeat

After the multiple posts I’ve made about this fecking cold/cough/snotfest, I finally admitted defeat on Friday, and Herself rang up the doctors to make an appointment for me while she was working from home.

So at 5.10 today, I’m going to the bloody doctors.

I fully expect them to say some variant of “It’s a cold/virus, there’s eff all we can do, now on yer bike”. (I don’t have much regard for GPs, as may have been noticeable in the past) But at least I’ll be going, and getting the answer officially…


Blowout

Sometimes you can just tell it’s Monday…

On the way to work this morning, travelling along the dual-carriageway A11, I had a tyre blow out. At the time I was in the outside lane, having just started to overtake another car. A bang, a thud, and a wickedly loud sound like going over the rumble strips. Other than that, I don’t know what else was occurring – I was busy keeping the car safe, and working to get it over onto the hard shoulder.

I did so – and got it onto a decent bit of hard shoulder on one of the slip roads, which helped. However, as it was the driver’s-side tyre, I was wearing dark clothing, and it was 7.30am, I opted for getting the breakdown people to come and change the damn thing rather than attempting it myself. (Something which the recovery guy agreed was a smart move) The breakdown people were great – Tesco insurance/breakdown said the guy would be there by 8.40am, and 8.40, there he was. Ten minutes later, all done and back on the road to work.

All’s OK, although I’m currently on one of those crappy space-saver spare tyres where you’re not supposed to go above 50mph. That’s getting changed tomorrow, at which point all will be well again. I’m a touch narked because the front tyres only got replaced back in May, so I wouldn’t have expected one to die by now, but I’ll talk to the tyre place about that tomorrow.

As it is, the tyre had sounded a bit odd yesterday – to the extent that I’d stopped and checked it wasn’t flat, and also gone round it looking for a big stone in the treads, but hadn’t found any problems. But (I now assume) that was the point where it blew today, so I’ll know better next time it happens – if it ever does.

In a way, I’m kind of pleased with myself – if nothing else, it’s another thing checked off the “I’ve done that, and survived it OK” list of driving tasks. I managed to deal with the situation, handle it safely, and not be a danger to myself or anyone else. Yes, I’ve lost a hubcap along the way, and I’ll need to replace the tyre, but that’s nothing really. After all, it could have been one hell of a lot worse in so many ways…


Slack Selling

Two weeks ago now, one of our neighbours put his house on the market – or at least that’s when we knew about it, when the sale board went up outside. However, one assumes that it’s been with them for a few days before that, while they get the board organised etc.

Now, I’m a bit of a nosy bugger, so I’ve been wondering how much the place is going for. After all, we know what we paid for this place, so it’s interesting to see what the place next door is up for, and all that.

But in that two weeks since the board went up, there’s been no mention of the place on either RightMove or the estate agent’s own site.

It does make you wonder how they expect to sell the damn place, particularly in these times of credit crunch, recession and so on, if they can’t even be bothered to advertise the fucker, doesn’t it?


Norfolk Place Names

One of the things that’s pretty much guaranteed to drive you crackers when moving to Norfolk (and I’m sure the same is true of many other counties – it’s just that with being here, I notice the Norfolk ones more) is the sheer randomness of the pronunciation of some of the town names.

For example, how would you pronounce Wymondham ? I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be Windham. (win-dom)

Other examples I’ve recently fallen foul of include :

  • Happisburgh – hays-bur
  • Tacolneston – tackle-ston
  • Stiffkey – stookey
  • Garboldisham – garble-sham

There’s plenty of others too, and locals invariably look at you like you’re some kind of weirdo when you pronounce the places like they’re spelt.


Animals – Further Information

Following on from the comments on my post below about Animals vs. Sleep, I feel that I should explain a bit further.

No, Hound is most definitely not the master of the house. She knows her place, knows when she’s gone too far, and gets told off when she’s been naughty. The scratching at night isn’t done to prove who’s in charge, it’s her fixating on trying to get comfortable to go to sleep.

Psycho Cat, on the other hand, is a wilful piece of crap who is well known for not stopping scratching until he gets where he wants to be. He’s also well-known as a master of the Vindictive Shit®, where if he has been barred from the room he wants to get in to and long-term scratching has been unsuccessful, he’ll take a shit outside the door (or on some favoured item of furniture/clothing/technology – I’ve even had to clear cat shit off the camera bag before now) as revenge. As options go, I’d rather get up and let the little fucker in, rather than walk out in the morning into a pile of stinking cat turd. Go figure.

With Hound, there’s a lot of underlying stuff. At the start of December, the vet finally diagnosed her with a canine form of OCD, alongside her anxiety issues and general barminess. This diagnosis came about when he observed her method of “handling” stressful situations, which involves her standing with her head facing a corner, staring at the walls, and ignoring everything else that goes on around her. It’s the equivalent of “head in the sand”, also known as “Lalalalalalalala, I can’t hear you”. The vet’s never seen anything like it, but he feels certain enough about the diagnosis that he’s put it in her records (having been seeing her now for four years) and confirming to the pet insurance people that this is a defined condition, rather than a behavioural issue.

While apparently she’s always been a determined, focussed idiot (Herself tells the story of when she and the now-ex went to choose a dog, the garden they were all in had a large railway-sleeper border in the lawn. All the other pups went round the barrier, but Hound insisted on trying to get over it, and wouldn’t stop until she did so) the anxiety issues also come about because of mis-treatment by a vet while they were diagnosing her Megaoesophagus. I won’t go into details – but suffice it to say that if I’d been around at that time, they’d have been sued, and reported to the RSPCA / RCVS.

Couple that with the fact that (although I didn’t write about it here) back in November 2004, she had the next best thing to a total mental breakdown due to fireworks (and a badly handled situation) and that in early 2005 we seriously considered giving up on her, and taking her to the Dogs Trust or wherever, and you get an impression of how bad she could be.

Overall, while Hound does have her foibles, she’s generally well-trained, well-disciplined, and knows her place in the pack structure at home. And that place is not at the top, much as she’d like it to be. At the same time, she does have significant issues, and for the most part those are tolerated and understood – even when they make her into a total pain in the arse at the same time. Yes, we could have given her up – but at the same time, that’s running away from a situation, which is something neither Herself or I are overly good at. The additional knowledge that there’s no way that anyone else would take her on, let alone in her ideal situation (which would be to be on a farm somewhere, sleeping in a barn – that’s where a lot of the scratching behaviours come from, I suspect) means that we know we’re really the last-resort. She’d have no other valid alternatives except being put to sleep.

So yes, some of her obsessions are perhaps tolerated – but with eight years of experience with Hound, we know that there are some battles that just won’t be won. We’ve got through a lot with her – and she’s now three years past the usual life expectancy for a dog with Megaoesophagus – and the anxieties and obsessions are mainly tempered by the homeopathic pills she’s on twice-daily, there are some things that now just won’t be broken.


Mountains out of Molehills

It’s weird, but in the last couple of days there’ve been two stories I’ve noticed in the media where a small argument or action has exploded into a murder.

First there was the row that started over the name of a kitten, and ended up with one person stabbing the other.

Then there was the man who murdered his estranged wife because she changed her Facebook status to ‘single’.

Now, I know – and freely admit – that sometimes I let stupid little things build up until I get pissed off, but then it all goes out and job done. I can’t see that those things would ever build up to me killing someone. Maybe that’s why these stories are (to me) so very, very strange.


Sleep vs. Animals

I’m beginning to suspect that some of the reason for my having gone down with three consecutive colds over the last six weeks is due to having really badly disturbed sleep as part of my general life. And most of those disturbances are currently being caused by our fucking bastard animals.

Hound is a pain in the arse during the night – she has this habit of lying down, then scratching the floor in order to try and get comfortable. We’ve tried a number of things, including moving her basket around to wherever she’s currently sleeping before we go to bed (i.e. if she’s sleeping in the hall during the night, the basket goes in the hall) but that doesn’t work – she just goes somewhere else to scratch. We’ve taken the rug by the back door up at night – it’s one of her main scratching targets – but she just goes somewhere else. Regardless, come about 1.30am or so, one of us will end up putting her in her cage, at which point she’ll sleep. Oh, and before anyone suggests it, if you just put her in the cage at night, she’ll bark and bark ’til she’s let out. No-win situation ’til she’s gone in there at about half one.

Psycho Cat on the other hand “just” sleeps in the crook of my knees. Doesn’t sound so bad, does it? Except overnight he becomes like a lead weight, to the extent that I can’t easily move him. No idea how he does it, but it means that when I want to turn over, it wakes me up sufficiently to move consciously around him. Even whacking the furry little fucker with my leg (not kicking as such, but usually filed under “fortuitous collisions”) while I move doesn’t make him move. We’ve tried moving him to Herself’s side of the bed (and to the bedside chair, among other locations) but I’m warm, so he keeps coming back.

Last night was an even more extreme example. Because I’m horribly snotty, and it all pools up in the back of my throat, while asleep at the moment I a) snore, and b) cough. So on bad nights, I’ve been sleeping in the spare room. I don’t mind – it means Herself can get some sleep without me sounding like an asthmatic gorilla in the background, plus I don’t worry as much about the snoring.

Anyway, last night I went in to the spare room at about midnight, and closed the door. By that time Hound had already done her “scratching the floor to get comfortable” thing a couple of times and been yelled at, but that was generally OK.

Half an hour later, there’s scratching outside the door of the spare room. I yell at Hound, but it doesn’t stop. Eventually I get up, open the door. Yes, it’s fucking Psycho Cat, who also won’t give up on the scratching ’til he comes in. Resigned, I go back to the spare bed (a sofa-bed, I should explain – and thus rather narrow as I can’t be arsed pulling it all down at 1 in the morning) get under the quilt, and feel Psycho Cat jumping up onto my feet, then – yes – back into the crook of my knees.

Half an hour after that, Hound goes into terminal floor-scratching, gets yelled at, and I get up to put her in the cage. Which, of course, pissed off Psycho Cat, as it disturbed him from his comfy location.

I eventually got to sleep properly about two, half-two. (For obvious reasons, my last ‘awake’ thought didn’t involve checking the time) Psycho Cat was back behind my knees, Hound was in her cage, and Herself was in the other bed.

But when all that’s considered, it does make me think that it might work as at least some of the explanation of why I’m feeling so run-down…


*Shudder*

Many many moons ago, I nearly lost the sight in one eye – I’d stood up straight into the flightpath of a thrown stone, which smashed the lens of my glasses, and powered the shards into my eyeball. Since then, I’ve always been pretty squeamish about eyes, and damage to them.

So this story just brings me out in shudders. One remarkably lucky person, to not lose his sight/eye/life, but all the same, *shudder*


How Not To Do It

A couple of weeks ago, an American financial advisor attempted to fake his own death. (And failed, in epic fashion)

It’s since been revealed that he had also left a bullet-point list of what needed to be said in his mayday radio call.

Ooops. Not the smartest of plans.


Italian Job Solved

Hang on a minute lads, I’ve got a great idea…

Last year, the Royal Society of Chemistry issued a challenge to people to come up with methods of solving the problem at the end of the original Italian Job film, where the coach hangs over the cliff-edge, loaded with gold that they can’t get to.

The Telegraph today has a list of the shortlist top five solutions – which are pretty entertaining in themselves.

You’ve just got to love a competition that brings up so many armchair inventors/engineers with such a range of surreal solutions. Only in Britain, I suspect…


Inauguration

So, today is the day when Barack Obama is inaugurated as President of the USA.

I just wonder how long it’ll be before there’s an undeniable assassination attempt now. By that I mean one that’s not just a redneck in a pickup heading towards Washington DC, but shots fired, Secret Service running around etc.

Because I’m an über-cynic, I suspect that it won’t be long…


Ideas Overload

At the moment, I’m a bit swamped on the ideas front. It’s not an unusual occurrence, to be honest – but it means I’m trying to stick with some vague kind of prioritisation (is that a word?) in order to get things done, and to get those ideas out into the real world.

At the same time, there’s also several ongoing projects for clients as well, which makes things slightly more interesting. I’ve been working through those as well (and there’s at least one still waiting that I should have completed a long time ago) because they’re paying jobs, whereas the ideas I’ve got may make money, but certainly won’t do so straight away – if ever, in fact.

I do like getting these ideas out of the way – and indeed, they’re all part of that much-mooted five-year plan I’ve been banging on about for the last two years or so – but I’d be just as happy to only have one idea at a time, rather than the four or five that are currently floating around at any given time. Sometimes, keeping track of them all isn’t exactly easy, although I don’t mind too much in general. I know that writing them down would be counter-productive (as I whittled about last week) so keeping them in my head is the best plan. After all, if I then forget them, the idea probably wasn’t worth that much in the first place.

The really frustrating/sad/geeky part is that when I get these ideas, they come fully equipped with database setups and tables as well. And that is just a sign that I really should be getting out one hell of a lot more…


Redirecting

Over the weekend, following on from a comment on here from Chris, I finally got round to making a change to the index page of D4D™ that I really should have made months (if not years) ago. And in honesty, I really thought I had done it years ago. I certainly planned to.

Anyway, the index page now redirects back to here. Which is how it should be, and what it should’ve been doing ages ago.

There are still plans for a redesign of D4D™, which would also involve moving servers to a new home. (That’s also related to another plan for some rationalisation of the number of hosting services I currently use) At that point, this section of D4D™ may change to being the index page of the entire site – so you’d only need www.dummies-for-destruction.co.uk , instead of remembering that extra /random – but setting things up in this way now will theoretically make things easier on that score anyway.

Come that time, I’ll be redirecting back the other way, so that anything at /random goes back to the index page. And all will be well.

We’ll see though. It’s a way off yet because like the builder who never completes his own extension, I’ve got enough work on right now that redeveloping/redesigning D4D™ keeps on getting put back.

Maybe I should set a target date, and then just work on thrashing it through. Or maybe I’ll simply let D4D™ keep on shambling along in its current guise for a while yet.

Time will tell.


Dethused

Yes, I know, it’s not a word. But all the same, it’s one I’ve created, and I’m sticking with it.

Following on from my thoughts about the new job I’m in, this morning started off with the serious “I really don’t want to do this any more” thoughts. For me that’s always been the sign that it’s time to get out and go somewhere else.

In fairness, it normally takes a lot longer before I’m ready to move on, but this time may well be one of the shortest turnaround periods in my work history.

We’ll see.


Tony Hart

RIP Tony Hart – I think most people knew he was on his way out, having lost the use of his hands following two strokes last year.

All the same, a significant loss.


Run Down

Currently, I seem to be developing my third cold in less than two months. All told, I’m just feeling run down and rubbish.

I don’t really know why it’s all attacking me at the moment – I suspect a general covering of “Bleh” due to reasons detailed in a previous post. We’re eating pretty well, I keep taking the ol’ vitamins etc., but at the moment it just keeps on coming round.

Maybe working in an office that resembles a plague-ward is having an effect too…


Temptation

From an agency in this morning’s email

“Hi Lyle, We’ve got a six month contract for a PHP developer in Gibraltar. Would you be interested?”

Talk about tempting…


Live Performances

When I go to see a concert – or even watching music programmes on TV etc. – one of the silly things that always impresses me is that the singers remember all the words.

For me, writing something down is the best way yet to forget it. It’s somewhere solid (even if that is only somewhere like here) and it’s somewhere I can find it again. So if I write it down, it’s effectively gone from my head.

That’s why (for me) it’s better to keep ideas in my head, rather than writing them down as an aide memoire – because it won’t aid me, I’ll just forget the entire thing.

So I find myself repeatedly in awe of the people who still know their lyrics, who can still produce them repeatedly at any given performance with seemingly no notes, reminders, hints or clues. To me that’s just awesome, regardless.

So what do you find yourself in awe of?


Icy Windows

Now that all the ice and crap has finally thawed again, I’m reminded of something I meant to write a week ago. The subject is simple – iced up car windows.

Over the week or so of consistently cold weather, I found it quite gobsmacking just how many people were out on the roads driving with only a tiny patch of scraped windscreen to see through, while leaving the rest to melt of its own accord. Partly because it’s illegal (if memory serves, you’re supposed to make sure all the windows are scraped/clear before you set off – The Highway Code certainly says so) and partly because it’s – well – incredibly fucking stupid.

Additionally, it doesn’t really take up that much time/effort. For me, the entire process involved simply opening the car, starting it up so that the heater was working and warming things from the inside, and going round with a scraper. By the time I’d done all four side windows, the heated windscreen and rear-windscreen had done their job, and the entire thing was ready to go in about five minutes. (at most)

Now yes, I know that I live out in The Sticks™, so leaving the engine running while scraping the windows isn’t likely to result in an incident like this one. Being outside and scraping the car also means I don’t leave it unattended and then come back to find it’s been nicked. (and let’s be honest, that should just be filed under “Idiot Tax”)

But my point is that it doesn’t take much effort to go round scraping the car’s windows. And personally I’d rather make that effort than either get pulled over by the police for dangerous driving (which I think is the correct charge for driving with non-clear windows) or be involved in an accident where the insurance then refuses to pay out because it could be seen as my fault for not seeing [whatever was collided with] because my windows were still iced over.


XKCD = Genius

Absolute genius in a cartoon strip.

XKCD comic

Work Three Months On – Unenthused

We’re coming up to the three-month mark since I started the new job, so I thought I’d do a bit of a brain-dump about it. Bear in mind, I’m still being fairly careful about not saying what area the job/company work in, as it’s a pretty limited range of companies that do the same work in the Norfolk area…

It’s probably going to be a long-ish and grumpy post, so if you don’t want to know more, don’t click on the “More” link below…

Read the rest of this entry »


Chilly

Just a thought : Isn’t it odd how you never see the police out with their “hair-dryer” speed guns when it’s cold or wet outside?


Changing Passwords

When faced with passwords that needs to be changed on a regular basis, one thing I always seem to forget is the relevance of timing.

After all, you don’t have to change it as soon as the stupid little dialogue box comes up to tell you to change it. At that point, you’ve still got (usually) a week or two to change it before everything goes tits-up.

So I need to remember that whatever else happens, don’t change it on a bloody Friday. Because then I bugger off for the weekend, and come Monday morning I don’t have a single bloody clue what I changed the frigging thing to. It usually takes about ten attempts to remember what the hell it was. Sometimes it also depends on what my mood was like when I changed it, which can have a knock-on effect in whether the password is sweary (which results in passwords like ‘cuntflaps’) or not.(resulting in words like ‘prestidigitate’) Both of those have been passwords in the past, by the way – but they’re not the current ones. (obviously)

I did remember it in the end (for once it was a non-sweary one) but it’s something I really need to learn to remember…


Masterchef – Deja Vu

In similar vein to this post from last year, it’s worth pointing out that Masterchef is back on BBC2 again.

And still the contestants drive me potty with all the guff about “[Tristan] is aiming to change jobs, and go from being a stockbroker to living his dream by cooking”. No-one says “Well why don’t you fucking try it out properly first?” or “Wouldn’t it be an idea to cook for more than yourself?“. One bell-end last week claimed that he wanted to open “something like the Manoir, a restaurant with rooms” – I think he went out at the end of the first round, for doing something a) dull or b) raw. After a while they all blend into one, I’m afraid.

The judges don’t do much for me either. Both John Torode and Greg Wallace come across as pompous prats – although some of that could be the scripting too – but if I hear them saying “They’re doing a meal they’ve never cooked before. In a semi-final! Shocking!” I’ll just spit.

Yet I still watch the damn thing – even though a good 40% of it drives me crackers. (On this point, Sky+ is a godsend – it’s great being able to fast-forward through the repetition, ‘discussion’ of who stays in etc., and all the intermediate Pop Idol/X-Factor guff of contestants calling home to say they got through etc.) I find the ideas people have are interesting, the pro-kitchens can be interesting – and/or make me think “I would never go there to eat” – and the execution of the ideas and recipes is something I do enjoy watching. I’ve always been in awe of the people who can go to a kitchen cupboard and just pick five or six items and put them together, knowing that they’ll work out as a good meal. My mum could do that easily, Herself can do so too, and so can other friends but to me it’s just an awesome talent that I simply don’t possess.

I can cook – but I need a recipe, or some kind of inspiration to work from. Sometimes when watching Masterchef I can come up with what I’d do with the selection of ingredients on offer, but for me it’s more a memory thing, something I’ve seen in another magazine or recipe book. But I know I don’t have the knowledge – more accurately, the inbuilt/memorised knowledge – of the necessary methods in order to get to that final result.


New Tripod

Over the Festering Season, we discovered that my old camera tripod had expired – it had been left in the back of Herself’s car, and somewhere along the line had got cold enough that the plastic around the centre column had completely sheared, with no real chance of repair. (Anything approaching a decent repair would have cost more than the original tripod)

So I took the opportunity to upgrade it a bit, and I’ve now got a new tripod (a Manfrotto 055XDB, if anyone cares) which is a bit of a beast. It’s heavier than the old one, weighing in at just over 2Kg all told. That’s OK, as I rarely do a lot of photography where I’m lugging the tripod around as well. (although that may change during the next year or two) However, it’s also a fair bit bigger/wider, which means that the old tripod bag I had won’t hold the new tripod. Arse, as they say. (However, I have now ordered a new one)

Still, it’s a great tripod, and should last a fair while too (assuming I don’t leave it in the car all the time, of course) as there’s far less plastic in the entire thing. I’m planning on getting out with it at some point this week, particularly as ‘night shots’ is one of the assignments on the NCFE course that I never got round to completing to my satisfaction. That’ll be the real acid test, using the damn thing properly – but for the moment I’m pretty satisfied with it, and I think it’ll do the job well.


Racist Terms

Of all the things that annoy me about the story of Prince Harry using a racially insulting term (no less than three years ago) is that the media then seems to use it as an excuse for repeating and publicising the same term ad infinitum.

The BBC story linked to above uses it, and the ITV News story I saw a few minutes ago on it used the same term no less than three times within the story.

So how does the media explain how they can get away with it when they’re reporting how offensive it is for someone else to use the term?


New MP3 Player

Over the Festering Season break, and as part of an impetus to get me back to the gym, I invested in a new MP3 player – the Sony Walkman S638F, with 16Gb of storage. Equally, my last MP3 player (purchased before I even started D4D™!) has now disappeared – although I’m sure we’ll now find it this weekend – so there was another valid reason to buy a new one.

Yes, sure, I could’ve bought an iPod instead, but considering I only paid £85 for it, I couldn’t have got a similar spec (or even a better spec) one for the same price. Plus well, I’m not a massive fan of Apple’s stuff anyway, and I’d rather have something different. The Walkman had a damn good review in the Register, and fitted in with other requirements as well, so it was pretty much the obvious choice.

And I have to say, I’m really pleased with it. The sound quality is spectacular – having been tested on some of my favourite tunes, I’m tempted to say it’s actually the best music player I’ve had since the old Panasonic ‘cobra top’ ghetto-blaster (which still lives on nearly fifteen years after purchase, and is an evil beast of a thing that used to be able to drown out the next-door pub’s disco-night)

As per my last post on MP3 players and storage (back in 2005) I really don’t see myself filling up that 16Gb unless I also download some videos from the BBC iPlayer site to watch on it while at the gym. I might fill it- you never know- but at the moment I’m using 7.5Gb of the available space, and that’s got enough variety to keep me going all week.

We’ll see.

But in the meantime, if someone’s looking for a new MP3 player, the Walkman ‘S’ range comes heavily recommended.


Online vs. Offline

Over at the Guardian’s “Comment is Free”, Anna has written a fantastic piece about Virtual people, real friends.

She puts it far far better than I ever could – and it’s well worth reading the entire piece.

“For the first time in history we’re lucky enough to choose friends not by location or luck, but pinpoint perfect friends by rounding up people with amazingly similar interests, matching politics, senses of humour, passionate feelings about the most infinitesimally tiny hobby communities. The friends I have now might be spread wide, geographically, but I’m closer to them than anyone I went to school with, by about a million miles.”


Smashing Time

Last night, while driving to the local(ish) supermarket for an evening shop, I was involved in my first “proper” accident.

Nothing massive, and really nothing special – just a door-mirror to door-mirror impact – but still, another first ticked off the list.

As it is, neither of us stopped (so I can’t really complain on that score) and it was just one of those things that happens on pitch-dark narrow(ish) roads. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t my fault, as I was just about in the verge at the time – but I could be wrong, in all honesty. I don’t think it was down to me – on narrow roads (and this is one I use all the time) I tend to stick as close to my side as humanly possible, especially when cars are coming in the other direction too – but it could’ve been. I just don’t know for sure.

All the same, everything’s OK, and the only cost is going to be a new door mirror – it’s completely smashed to fuck. But things could’ve been much worse, if we’d been a foot closer.


Writing Splits

At the moment, I’m splitting my writing stuff between three sites and two additional projects – which is a bit of a strain, as you can imagine. Thankfully, all of them have very different styles/themes/subjects, which helps, but it can still all be a bit of a clash.
The three main sites are :

  1. Here (obviously)
  2. The company business site, which is more about business and development stuff
  3. The photography site, which is more around photography and a semi-photoblog

I don’t mind too much – well, I set myself the tasks, so I shouldn’t do – but on occasion it gets to be a bit of a head-fuck. D4D™ is obviously the one with the most updates, and the other two probably only get updated weekly. OK, sometimes fortnightly, or even monthly. But in the context of what they are, that’s (in my opinion) fairly reasonable. Neither site is high-traffic – hell, not even close – but they fulfil a need and serve a purpose.

But as time goes on this year, I don’t know that they’ll all survive. When you take into account the plan to have at least one significant dollop of “proper” writing (or two or three smaller bits than can equate to one significant dollop) done by the end of the year, well, we’ll just have to see what lives or dies on the writing front, won’t we?


Reducing DRM

While I’m nowhere even close to being an Apple® fanboy, I do use iTunes for a significant portion of downloading. (particularly when I also use eMusic, which I believe is now owned by iTunes) As such, I’m pleased to see that they’ve announced that iTunes is going to be DRM-free, with 8 million of its 10 million tracks now available without any DRM, and the rest over the next few months.

DRM is (basically) copy protection – it’s the media industry’s way of saying “You can buy our stuff, but we’ll still tell you how you can – and can’t – use it”. It’s horrifically flawed, and something I’m fairly passionately anti at the best of times.

As a perfect example of this, we’ve both recently bought new Sony MP3 players and wanted to put music bought on iTunes onto them. Only because of DRM, you can’t. Well, you can if you burn an audio CD of the downloaded files, re-import them into [Music player of choice] as MP3s, and then put them on the player, but that’s circumvention of the DRM, and thus naughty. You’re using a file you’ve bought and paid for, but in a way that the music industry doesn’t like. They want you to buy it on iTunes and use it through that, but if you want it to go on another MP3 player, you should buy another copy of the same file that’s authorised for use on your MP3 player. Oh, and you shouldn’t be buying the album on CD and then ripping it to MP3 so you can listen to it on your player either.

It’s the same with other download services (and things like BBC iPlayer etc. too) which have historically been only available through Internet Explorer, so that they can use the Windows Media Player DRM – which is also why so many MP3 players etc. insist on using WMP 11, which has the latest/’greatest’ DRM modules on it.

So to me it’s a sign that perhaps the music studios and media producers are finally beginning to see some sense if they’ll allow iTunes to finally sell music without DRM on it.


Mobile Data Use

It being a month (give or take) since I got the new phone and unlimited mobile data, I got the bill today from O2.

Just in that first month, I’ve used something like 8Mb of online data all told, which would’ve cost me some £3 per Mb or so. (It’s hard to tell for sure, as they’ve changed the tariff to be ‘Up to £1 per day’ instead of ‘£x per Mb’, but I remember it being about £3 per Mb last time I looked)

Either way though, the ‘unlimited’ browsing bolt-on looks like it will be a good plan all round.


Missing the Point

An email from Canon today :

We are sending you this email because we take our customers’ data seriously and only want to hold your data if you want us to.

You have joined CANON iMAGE GATEWAY and registered ownership of a EOS 20D, but decided not to receive communications from us. We are giving you the opportunity to opt in, which means you will receive regular communications, or to delete your details permanently from our database.

So :

  1. You’re contacting me even though I opted out of being contacted
  2. It now looks like the choice is
    1. Opt in
    2. Get completely deleted

As I’ve never used the Image (Sorry, iMage) Gateway, I think I know which option I’ll be going for…


The film wishlist

Currently, 2009 is looking like it’ll have a fair number of films that I want to see. At the moment, the list looks like this (in no particular order, except how I remember them) with links to the trailer sites:

Yes, there’s some right rubbish in there (Transformers 2 and Wolverine, as examples) but well, I’m not proud, I know I’ve got ropy taste in films sometimes. Sometimes though I just want brainless entertainment rather than high-brow intellectual matter.

There are countless numbers I don’t want to see as well (Angels and Demons, I’m looking at you here), but I can’t be arsed to list those.

Mind you, it’s also interesting to compare it with the list of the films Hollywood hope you’ll be watching to make them a profit…


Clueless

Another in an irregular series of posts about the incompetence of agencies. (And I’ve added a new category for it, so I’ll have a trawl through the archives at some point in order to add a few more to the category)

We’ve been in Norfolk now for more than two years.

So it’s a bit of a surprise (although not entirely unexpected, due to the agency in question being a bunch of twunts) to get an email today detailing a contract in a very junior role doing HTML and CSS. For £10 per hour. In Kent.

In short, no fucking chance. And all it really shows is that this particular agency – I haven’t yet decided whether to name-and-shame, although God knows, it’s tempting – really know fuck-all about the people on their books. (Oh, and don’t update their records at all, despite repeated requests to do so)

Twunts.


Bye Bye, Christmas

Bah, HumbugAnd there we go, that’s the Festering Season™ over and done with for another eleven months.

In the office, all the decorations are down – I’ve no idea who won “Best dressed department”, and nor do I care – and it all just feels that bit saner than it did last week.

I’ve still got one or two thoughts that I need to put into writing, but that’ll be done over the next few days, I should think.


Golf Club Boom

While I’m not a golf player (I stick with that “Golf is a good walk ruined” aphorism) I found this story on the BBC to be quite interesting.

Basically, a new generation of “thin-faced titanium” clubs make a noise on contact with the golf-ball that has been measured at up to 130dB . That’s loud – and it’s been found as potentially causing hearing damage in some golfers.


Police “Hacking”

There’s an interesting story in The Times today about police forces in the UK and “remote searches” of a suspect’s PC.

It doesn’t need a court warrant, just for a senior officer to say he “believes” that it is “proportionate” and necessary to prevent or detect serious crime — which is defined as any offence attracting a jail sentence of more than three years. So, no chance of any abuse of the system there, then. *cough*

This development isn’t new – it’s been in place since an amendment to the Computer Misuse Act 1990 in 1994 which made hacking legal if it was authorised and carried out by the state.

However, I wonder what happens if the suspect being “remote searched” has a firewall and/or secure wireless network (or no wireless network at all) which prevents that remote search. Can they then also be charged with refusing/blocking a ‘legitimate’ search, in the same way you can if you refuse to be stop-and-searched?


Weighty Issues – Further Thoughts

Following on from my post about weight etc. at the end of last year (OK, less than a week ago) and the comments that came, I thought I’d add some more thoughts about it now we’re into 2009.

During my time off, I looked at Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR, not BMI), which is basically sufficient only for the functioning of the vital organs, but gives a rough idea of what calories the body burns just to keep going. And mine works out (on an admittedly rough working out, rather than the full-precision test) as being about 2,000 to 2,500 calories, depending on the equation used.

I don’t yet know what that means for me – if it’s anywhere even vaguely close to right, I assume it means that I should be taking on at least that amount of calories per day just to break even. I also assume that if my intake is less than that (and I’m pretty sure it’s significantly less than 2,500 per day) then my body thinks it’s starving, and thus stores everything as fat instead of using it or burning it up. That’s no surprise, it’s been put forward as an idea a couple of times over the years already.

The thing is though, that if I do attempt to eat more in accordance with things like BMR figures, and recommendations from gyms etc. I just put weight on. I know, it’s because the body still thinks it’s starving and is processing into fat for storage rather than actually using the damn calories, but it’s one of the most demoralising things around – I want to get fitter, not fatter. And no-one gives any idea of how long it’ll take for my body to get used to the idea of not being starved, and use the calories instead of store them. If it’s only a couple of weeks then fine – if it’s a couple of months or more, not so fine.

Later in the year, come spring-time, I might just get out on my bike again. That appeals a lot more than going running – although running does have a certain strange appeal, just not at my current weight – but well, we’ll see. I do want to get more use out of the bike (although there’s no fucking way I’m ever going to be cycling the 25 miles to/from the current job!) so we’ll see.

In the meantime, I’m working on going to the gym on a more regular basis. It’s currently not helped by the fact I’m still coughing up lumps of lung (or the contents thereof – I’m not doing analysis to find out which) which leaves me feeling like shit, but even getting back to the basic routine of gym attendance is probably a good thing in the long term, I guess.


Demoralising Success

Watching Starter for Ten tonight, I was surprised by how young James McAvoy looked, for it only being made two (sorry, three) years ago, so I looked up some information on him.

And it’s incredibly depressing, seeing that someone who’s done as many programmes and films as he has is still only twenty-bloody-nine.

Yes, born in ’79. Eight years after me. It’s making me feel very old, I have to say.


New Doctor

It still hasn’t been revealed as I write this, but when it comes to the new Dr Who, I’d love to see a woman Doctor.

Just imagine the fun you could have with it – “Oooh, breasts, periods, weird” etc.


Meerkats

Much as I don’t usually promote insurance comparison websites, I do like the way that CompareTheMarket has also now done the spoof Compare the Meerkat.com website.

It’s linked to a TV advert, but well, it made me chuckle.


The ’09 Photography Project

As well as the plan to do more “proper” writing in 2009, I’m also planning to make a change to my photography site.

With the NCFE course, I’ve started taking more photos – which was one of the main goals of starting the course – and it’s provided me with some motivation. And while the course is still ongoing, I’m also going to be aiming to put at least one new photo per week up on the photography site as well.

Now I know that “one photo per week” doesn’t sound like much – but right now I’d rather have quality than quantity, and have one decent photo per week than five or six ropy ones I’m not entirely happy with if I were doing a “one photo per day” project. I’ve got the greatest respect for the Project365 people who do undertake that challenge, but with the amount of things I’m currently doing, for me it just wouldn’t be practical. Besides, I know that as I got further behind on a “photo per day” project, I’d get more and more demotivated. (which may or may not be grammatical, but you get the idea)

The aim with a “photo per week” is just to keep on going, keep on going out and taking photos, with the aim of putting them up on the site. Of course, I’ve got to add in a couple of bits of code on the site in order to handle it, but that’s what Christmas/New Year is for, right?


The ’09 Writing Project

“Don’t call yourself a writer until you’ve got something finished. Don’t give me those two pages – no-one will buy them, no-one will want them, you’ve got to finish it. Work, finish it, then you can call yourself a writer”
Russell T Davies on Charlie Brooker’s ScreenBurn (Writer’s Special)

Over the last three or four months I’ve been working on the script for a project with Dragon – there’re still some tweaks to be made to it, but we’re pretty much there, I think.

For 2009, I want to get another one completed : at least a complete first draft, and with luck being close to a completed product by this time next year. I think that’s realistic, along with all the other odds and sods that are going to be going on.

We’ll see, of course. Things might all click together and I’ll get it done in the first three months. However, I wouldn’t place money on that eventuality. I do want to get some more writing done though, and I hope that this next twelve months will get me started on that road…


Booking Breaks

In view of trying to be more organised (and the fact that the current job gives me holiday pay) we’ve been trying to be more prepared when it comes to holidays etc. for 2009.

So this week we’ve booked the first break – a week up in Castle Douglas, in Dumfries & Galloway at the end of March.

It’s an area I’ve never been to, but it should be fun. I’m already looking forward to it, even with a seven hour drive to get there…


Weighty Issues

Over 2008, one thing I planned to do was lose some weight. I know I’ve added more on, and I wrote about it back in August time when we joined up with the new gym that opened locally. At the moment I’ve still got a couple of months ’til the first dollop of membership expires, and in that time I really should start going.

You see, over the last three months I just haven’t had the motivation. (Or, in a lot of cases, the time) I know I should go, I know I need to go in order to lose the weight I’ve put on – but despite that knowing, the actual “OK, I’m going” hasn’t clicked into place.

The thing is, I don’t over-eat – I don’t sit at my desk with chocolate galore, nor am I a biscuit fiend, or a fast-food junkie. (Well, OK, I am a biscuit-fiend, but as a result we don’t buy many biscuits at all, otherwise I’d have an excuse) At home we both eat healthily (Usually vegetarian, occasionally fish, and very little ‘junk’ food) and not to excess. I admit, my portion control could probably do with a bit of work, but that’s it. Even on a diet, I don’t lose much weight – and most of the people we’ve talked to about it say I should eat more, not less, which is something I just can’t get my head round at all.

The lack of motivation gym-wise isn’t helped by the fact that the gym is now in exactly the opposite direction to my workplace, so to go to the gym I drive past the route home. It’s not much of an excuse – it’s not meant to be – but it still contributes. Equally, it’s not open late in the evenings, so we can’t go home, eat, relax, then go.

But all told, it’s really the motivation thing – I know I should go, and I should organise myself better in order to go. I just haven’t done so.

The stupid thing about it all is that I’m not actually happy with my weight being where it is – but at the same time, nor do I worry/care enough about it to want to do anything about it. It’s all a bit of a Catch 22 at the moment – logic and emotion tell me I need to do it, but the motivation side of things, yeah, that’s just not happening. And I don’t really understand why.

I want to go back in the New Year, and see how it goes. But if I’m honest, I don’t know – we’ll see.